We talkin' 'bout PRACTICE.

Not a game.

PRACTICE.

Yes, over here at the TST household, we've been practicing binkies and bottles. And it's driving the OCD, Mama-Bear instinct in me crazy at 2am when Matt tries to give her a bottle and she cries for more than 30 seconds. But I can fix that! Lemme at 'er!

NO. She needs to practice.

The binkies seem to help as she's making the transition. She's not fighting it as much anymore.

The trouble is, with all the stuff I dislike about nursing, there is one thing that's awesome (besides all the medical benefits of it and yada yada yada)...

...she needs me. Only me.

And she's all me. Every bit of her exists because of me.

Now, I know it's silly to think like this. Using a bottle from time to time doesn't mean she'll need me any less, you know? And she needs her daddy, too. I don't need a bottle now but I still need my Mom. I can't imagine her not being there to help me. So here I am, 32 years old, and I need her.

No bottle required.

But it's crazy once you become a mother. There's this nutty instinctual thing that just goes on and you know parts of it are irrational, yet you feel it nonetheless. And one of those things is that when I stop nursing, she won't need me anymore.

Silly, I know.

What she needs me to do is to be there for her and calm her down and hug her and support her. And that can be done long after the bottles are done.

What she needs me to do is set a good example of how to be a strong and intelligent woman.

So I'm trying to remember that. And we're practicing over here. She's practicing a bottle....and I'm practicing letting go enough to let her grow. And remembering that she can't do that without me, no matter what.

On Slowing Down to go Faster

I've never been very good at slowing down. When I had Bug, I remember those first few weeks of craziness and hormones and sleep-deprivation and going from full speed ahead at work to STOP. SIT ON COUCH. NAP IF YOU CAN. It was kind of rough for me.

This time around, I'm trying to enjoy this more. It's still been hard, as I'm definitely anxious to get moving again. Moving at home. Moving at work. Moving in workouts. But this time, I'm definitely cutting myself some slack. Four weeks ago, my body did something freaking amazing. I know that I need to be patient with it, and work on its schedule--not mine. I'm trying to enjoy these crazy night hours as much as I can, despite them making me lose my marbles from time to time. Because I know as never-ending as this stage seems, I will blink and she'll be the size of Bug. And I'll barely be able to catch her.

I'm getting better at understanding that sometimes you have to slow down, or in your quest to do everything you'll miss everything.

Two more weeks...

Thanks for all the support and suggestions on the last post! It seems we are starting to make progress with our little battle here. Man, this girl's a fighter. :) I know it's a good quality to have, so I'm trying not to break it. Just get her to be a fighter who accepts plastic once in a while.

I am getting so so so excited about racing this season. More on that later--I have a post brewing in my head (if I ever get the time to have two hands to actually write it). My team is such a great group of people and I'm very lucky to be a part of something so freaking cool. So I hope you join us! Get those video cameras rolling!

My baby girl is a month old today. I can hardly believe it. She's brought so much joy to all three of us, and despite it being quite chaotic and me being really sleep-deprived, life is just perfect.

Two weeks from tomorrow I have my 6 week appointment. Which means, barring unforeseen circumstances or problems, that I should have the OK to start working out again. I've been walking lots and doing light stretching, and let me tell ya I am ANTSY to start running again. I think I will celebrate by calling my local running shop and setting aside some new kicks to run in. Because everyone knows new shoes make you go faster, right?

Right?

Come on, work with me here, people.

In other news, since I can't race the Cleveland Half Marathon, I have two awesome friends coming in to run it--Jacks and soon-to-be Mr. Jacks! Yahoooooo! And, my tribro TriEric and I have some big plans on how to be good entertainment on the race course. Let's just say it pays homage to the great Steve In A Speedo, my other tribro. Steve, you will be proud.

"That's my daughter in the water..."

"...I lost every time I fought her...I lost every time." --Daughter, by Loudon Wainwright

So I love that song. One of the first things I listened to in the hospital after Emery arrived.

But it is abundantly clear to me that this is definitely MY daughter. Because don't be fooled by her snuggles and coos, and her sweet little baby smell. This girl is determined.

Determined to NEVER EVER DRINK FROM A BOTTLE IN HER LIFE THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

We're fighting a little battle here and trying everything: different bottles, different rooms, different people. Singing, talking, NCAA basketball. Walking, bouncing, sitting. Crying. (me and her) Ugh.

Everyone say it with me, "Three cheers for PLASTIC!" Come on, baby girl....please please please.

She is bound and determined to have a showdown; nay, a complete and utter battle of the wills. But this is one I must win, my friends. Mommy's going back to work in a little bit, and it's gonna have to happen. Bug had no trouble at all going back and forth--we never had to deal with this with him. And it's been a rough few days here as we've tried to reason with a 26 day old.

She has NO IDEA who she's up against.

I mean, I've done marathons and Ironman and stuff. I should be able to handle this, right? No problem. Bring it on, small fry.

Oh...
...but the screaming.

And the sad, little crying face.

aggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

So I must be strong. We must be strong. Because this has to work--there's no way around it-- but I have a feeling that she's going to be a tough one to crack. Because, um, look at her mother. I don't exactly back down easily.

And I have a feeling that this won't be the first battle I ever have to fight with my fiery, determined, and snuggly sweet little girl.

"Making the Team"
March 15, 2010
Madison, WI

Now in its third year of giving back to the endurance community, Team Evotri once again wants you to be part of the journey.

This spring, the team will be adding another teammate from the endurance sport community. Along with joining the family, the new recruit will be awarded a prize package from the Team Evotri sponsors: SRAM, Robbie VenturaÕs Vision Quest Coaching, CycleOps Power, Zipp Speed Weaponry, 2XU, Headsweats, and new sponsor for the 2010 season, Specialized Bicycles!

Over the next few months the team and sponsors will be looking for an individual who embraces the spirit of triathlon: someone positive, enthusiastic, and dedicated to giving back to the community. Triathlon experience is not a deciding factor in choosing a winner, but passion is. Do you have what it takes to make the team?

Winners can rest assured their performance will undoubtedly be taken to the next level with the following prize package:

Trusted by world champions like Chris McCormack and Melanie McQuaid, the veteran racing professionals at Specialized will provide the winner with an unbelievable race package. Be prepared to light up the course with none other than the fiercely designed and wickedly fast Transition Pro Time Trial bike, technical helmet, and racing shoes.

Ever innovative CycleOps Power will provide the winner with a cutting edge Joule wireless Powertap SL+.

The endurance experts at Vision Quest Coaching will take the winner to the next level with a dynamic professional coaching package.

SRAM will outfit the Transition Pros with world-class Force drivetrains, engineered for top performance.

The velocity doctors at Zipp Speed Weaponry will provide 606 wheelsets, cranks and bars for the excellence in endurance sport trifecta.

The winner of the 2010 Team Evotri slot will receive a brand new wetsuit and race gear from 2XU, the industry experts in state-of-the-art style.

To top off this incredible package, the 2010 team slot winner will also receive a collection of custom racing hats and visors from the industry leader in endurance accessories: Headsweats.

Team Evotri and their sponsors invite you to submit a video conveying why you are the best pick for the team in 2010.

Making the Team: 2010: Contest Guidelines:

Endurance sport enthusiasts, do you have what it takes to make the team? Tell us how and why in a video submission no longer than five minutes, and be sure to recruit your friends to help you out! Videos will be evaluated by Team Evotri and their sponsors for creativity, quality, and how well they address the following questions:

1. How will you benefit the team if you're chosen? What are your personal attributes?

2. How have you, and how do you plan to give back to the endurance sport community? Nothing is too insignificant, list it all.

3. What are your future plans regarding triathlon and endurance sport?

*Upload all videos to You Tube and send the link to MakingTheTeam@evotri.com by April 15, 2010.

*Contestants should provide contact information along with his/her link submission. Team Evotri and their sponsors will announce the winner in May, 2010.

*Videos not within the time constraints will not be considered.

*By sending a video link to MakingTheTeam@evotri.com, candidates grant contest affiliates permission to use said video for promotional purposes affiliated with Team Evotri and the Making the Team: 2010 contest.

*The winner of the team slot forfeits all awards if he/she is unable to continue as a team member for any reason.

*The winner of the team slot agrees to contribute to the Team Evotri web site for as long as he/she is a member of Team Evotri.

*The winner of the team slot agrees to attend the WIBA training weekend in Madison, Wisconsin in July, 2010 and race the Rev3 Cedar Point Half-Ironman in September, 2010.

Transition Pros provided by Specialized, an industry leader committed to excellence in both performance and design. Visit http://www.specialized.com for their full line of men's and women's road and mountain bikes.

CycleOps Powertaps and trainers are provided by the Madison, Wisconsin-based Saris Cycling Group; makers of industry leading power meters, racks and indoor trainers, as well as home to the top minds in performance science. Visit http://www.cycleops.com for an up close and personal education.

Professional coaching provided by Vision Quest: a dynamic, hands on, fully involved coaching program designed to provide direct interaction between the athletes and the coach for triathletes and cyclists. Please find more information on the diverse and flexible programs at http://www.visionquestcoaching.com.

Wheels of Team EvoTri provided by Zipp Speed Weaponry, flawless craftsmanship makes these wheels, aerobars and cranks the industry leaders in speed and aerodynamic efficiency. For more information, and for a complete product catalog, visit http://www.zipp.com.

Drivetrain components provided by SRAM, manufacturers of world-class bicycle parts including the new Double Tap & Exact Actuation technologies designed for faster Tri, Road & CX machines. See & learn more at http:/www.willyoumaketheleap.com.

Cutting-edge and sleek, 2XU will assure teammates maximize their potential with the industry's most revolutionary wetsuits and race gear. Visit http://www.2xu.com for the latest innovations.

Headsweats custom racing gear surpasses all others in absorption and comfort when its needed most. All seasons, all conditions, Headsweats goes the distance. Check out http:/www.headsweats.com to see the entire 2010 line.

one handed typing is hella hard

so forgive my lack of capitalization here. or posting.

but i swear there is some HUGE and exciting news regarding my awesome team, Evotri, coming up VERY soon. look at that--so huge i even used the shift key, people! i am sooooooooooo stoked for this season...i can't even tell ya.

baby bean turns 3 weeks old today, and we all fall more in love with her every day.

see what i mean?

okay, stay tuned this week for some suuuuuupppppeeeeeeerrrrr exciting news. i can hardly wait!

Things I Thought On My Walk Today

That poodle does an awful lot of trash talking. I mean, come on. Dude. You're a poodle. Look at yourself. I can't take you seriously.

There goes a biker. *jealous* Sigh.

There goes a runner in a tank top and shorts. *jealous* Sigh.

I'll be there soon enough. Yay!

It's amazing how skinny you feel 2.5 weeks after giving birth, yet how skinny you are NOT. All relative, I guess...

I wish the next 30 pounds would drop off as fast as the first 30 pounds just did. Sadly, I know that's not how it works...gonna have to start running this post-baby muffin top off in about 4 weeks.

Two miles slowly walked with my snuggley Bean and this crazy Pug in the 58 degrees and sun = worth the wait. So will my first ride and run.

Patience....patience...

The Journey To Boston...

...began yesterday, with a very, very slow mile walked on the treadmill.

Enjoying all the snuggles, sleepy smiles, and time with our new little girl. I'm very excited to see where this journey goes from here, and I can't wait to run again. I just need to be patient and wait the full six weeks so I'm all recovered, and then ease into things.

But in the meantime, at least I get to start walking. :)

Emery Grace

Emery: industrious leader.

Grace: grace of God.

Two things that I hope my daughter grows to know and to be.

She was born at 4:15am on Sunday morning, and was 8 pounds, 12 ounces.

We are absolutely in love.

See? I told you so.

This baby will totally be late. Like me.

Still nothing....3 more days until the "official" due date, but I'm calling it now: LATE, my friends. Don't hold your breath. This is a product of Matt and I, and I should know.

Anyway, I gave up trying to sleep around 4:17am this morning and picked up the book I started last night: The Help. It is really, REALLY good. And I have this thing about books--I read RIDICULOUSLY fast (like, to the point where no one believes I'm really reading it) and I can't put things down until I know how they end. Which is a problem if it's long. I read Sarah's Key in 3 hours and 10 minutes. STRAIGHT. I had to. Now, I started The Help last night around 8:30 and currently, after this morning's 2 hours, I am on page 248. I swear I am actually reading it. Around 7:30, I gave up, and went to Panera to get bagels. Here it is, 8:32am, and Matt and Bug are still sleeping.

Last night, perhaps because I am the size of a walrus, I found myself thinking about how I'm going to get my body back. I'm definitely a little worried about 2 kids, as I've stated before. And people who love to tell me how "hard it will be" are starting to drive me nuts. (Thanks, by the way, to people out there kickin' it with 2 and taking names. You guys rock.) I know it will be a definite adjustment, but I've never backed down from a challenge before and I'm not about to start now.

So, as I've also stated before, my goal will be to qualify for Boston. It's going to take me a bit to get there, as I am hoping to avoid all anxiety issues that I had with Bug. That was rough. But that was different, because I had to work for 4 months instead of 4 weeks before summer break. And it was my first year of AP US History; not my third. I'm in a much better spot now professionally...not to mention, the timing is just plain better. Ever wonder why so many teacher's kids are born in late winter or early spring? ;)

Here's a few things I need to work on after this watermelon decides to make its grand appearance from my ridiculously stretched abdomen:

It will be very hard for me to get to Boston: a combination of skill, determination, sacrifice, and just a good day. I will need every edge I can get. Here's what I'm working on in my head now:

1. I need to get STRONGER. No more slacking on weight training. It will need to be efficient, but it will need to be OFTEN. Please hold me to this. I'm 32, and I know that's the first thing to "go." Plus, it will keep me from injury--especially as I ramp up mileage in late summer and early fall. There is absolutely no reason why I can't do some kind of strength training 2-3 times a week for 20 minutes.

2. I think dropping an additional 5-6 pounds might help, too. My typical racing weight is around 145-147. I noticed a big difference from when I raced slightly higher than this in 2008 to when I raced right at this in 2009. I'm thinking if I could get to around 140, it might really help shave off the minutes or seconds I need. This won't be too difficult, as it leads me to #3...

3. NUTRITION. I am very healthy and eat healthy, too. However, I love my sweets. I simply cannot pass up chocolate or ice cream. I really need to focus on cutting down on the refined sugars and eating as clean as I can. I definitely notice a change in my energy level when I eat well and skip the sugar. Next season, I need to think when I eat the sweet stuff and really try to remember my ultimate goal. I think by cutting down (notice I didn't say OUT--a girl's gotta have some ice cream or a beer from time to time) these empty calories, and combine that with a little more strength, I can drop a few more pounds. 140ish is about as low as I'd like to go, given my height and body type.

I think everything else is there. Treadmill for early morning workouts? Check. Group to run with on the weekends? Check. Masters swim this summer in the early am to push me in the pool? Check. (Yes...I might try Masters again, despite my disastrous start back in '07....where, I've come to realize, I just met the WRONG guy there who rubbed me the WRONG way BIG TIME. But he won't be at this one, so no one will get hurt.) Trainer for indoor quality workouts? Check. Friends to ride with at the drop of a hat during naptime this summer for longer rides? Well.....you can't get everything you want. But I've got almost everything set up here.

Most importantly: awesome husband who supports me? Check.

Very flexible summer job schedule for both of us? Yep.

Amazing family nearby who helps more than they know? Uh-huh.

So this will be a team effort here. If I am lucky enough to get to Boston, it won't be because I did it alone. That's for sure. There are some things I can do by myself, as listed above. But most of this will be made possible by those around me.

So the goal is...

Rev3 70.3 in September: push myself hard and see how it goes--if I'm in PR shape, than go for it. If 2 has been rougher than I expected, not to beat myself up and just have a great race.

Fall Classic Half Marathon: 1:40.

Cleveland Marathon 2011: 3:40.59 or better.

It's aggressive, but you know what? Sometimes I am, too.

So for now, I'm going to waddle and get myself a banana. Hopefully the next time I'm on here, I'll have some news to share about Baby Bean...wish me luck!

Early--and ME--in the same sentence?

Hmmmmmm..

So, I just sort of have been operating under the assumption that this baby will be late. Because, let's be honest--it's me we're talking about here. I'm late EVERYWHERE I go. Chronically 5 minutes late and frantically racing everywhere. Matt's the same way.

So I just got back from the doctor, and I still have about a week and a half to go, and to spare you the details let's just say things are definitely progressing. And I had a bit of a scare last night. Totally thought something was up. But then I fell asleep, so obviously not.

This baby is big, so I'm definitely rooting for the "sooner rather than later" scenario...however, I have my little world planned out with work ending next Friday and a few days before baby gets here. So, this SO doesn't fit in with MY plans. ;)

We'll see how it goes here...Baby Bean may be here before I sure would. After all, as my mom will gladly tell you, I was FOUR days late. In the heat of July. (Sorry, Mom....) Usually she likes to remind me of that when I ask why she couldn't have just held on for two more days so I'd be born on 7/7/77?

Any over/unders? Anyone want to place bets? I'm up for making this as entertaining as possible....

And then there were TWO.

As in, WEEKS.

Work has been KEEEEELING me lately. This baby has dropped fo' sho', so I spend my time waddling like there's a watermelon lodged squarely in my pelvis and trying not to pee my pants. It's pretty much awesome.

I did have a few good laughs today, mostly because I was teaching about Teddy Roosevelt's "Big Stick Diplomacy." Because you know what? That phrase might have worked in the early 1900s, but it really doesn't translate well into 2010. Especially if you're 16.

Uh, huh huh. Huh huh huh. She said, CARRY A BIG STICK. Huh huh.

Then, when teaching about the annexation of Hawaii, I put a picture of Queen Liliuokalani on the board and asked the kids if they could tell me who it was.

"Queen....oh, wait!....Queen somebody."

"Queen Lalalalala?"

Come ON guys, I responded. You're getting close. Queen L....?

"Queen Latifah!"

So that made me laugh.

I'm excited to find out if this bean is a girl or a boy. I'm excited just to not be huge and round, and to drink beer again, too. But finding out if it's a girl or a boy is what is really keeping me motivated. I know some think I'm crazy for NOT finding out, but for me it just seems to make these last 2-3 weeks of sheer uncomfortable hugeness much easier to deal with.

I do have to admit, though, that I am a little nervous if it's a girl. I am so in "boy mode," and just having a blast playing with cars and remote control dinosaurs and trains and getting dirty and stuff. I don't speak pink. I never have. I don't even really speak doll that well. What on earth am I going to do if it's a girly girl?

I am sooooooooooo not a girly girl.

I will say one thing: there will not be an overload of pink. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. A little pink is fine, but not every single thing. I might hurl.

It's not as much that I'm scared to have a baby girl, as I am scared to have a girl from age 14-16. Because I see that every day. Most of the time it's fine. But sometimes girls can be so mean and nasty. Like in seventh grade, too. Ugh. That's not a good year, either. Mean mean MEAN and nasty passive-aggressive UGH. And I feel like it's all gotten way worse than when I went through it back in the dark ages before the intarwebs and facebook and all this other stuff. Some of the stuff I hear that goes on is just so mean. Good thing that wasn't around when I was all awkward with bad 80s bangs and a horrible fashion sense.

(Although, seeing as I'm carrying most likely close to 60 extra pounds right now I am quite awkward. And am lacking in the fashion sense department, as I'm down to about 3 pairs of pants that "fit" me now. And "fit" is in quotation marks for a reason.)

So if this is a girl, I will have some learning to do. First lesson: how to survive aisle after aisle of pink stuff and toys that are all about dolls and clothes and stuff.

Or not. Right? Because girls can play with cars, too. And dinosaurs are totally unisex.

I picked up Bug at the sitter's yesterday, and she said, "Shhhhh...." and pointed to the corner. Bug was carefully "feeding" a baby doll that he had put in a toy high chair. "Baby want milk? Baby want egg?"

So my boy can be a caring little Bug that plays with dolls. And if I have a girl, she can play with trucks and dinos, too. This is 2010. There are no rules anymore, right?

So perhaps I need to not worry as much about what happened to ME or what I was doing at age 12, 14, or 16. Because chances are the technologies that this potential girl will have aren't even a blip on the sci-fi radar yet.

If I raise them to care about others, then it doesn't matter what color they like to wear or what toys they play with. Or, later on, what music they listen to and what color their hair is.

I just hope I can at least learn to tolerate some pink.

;)

Holy SMOKES.

So "uncomfortable" is putting it mildly.

Thankfully, I am blessed with a FREAKING AMAZING HUSBAND who has been helping out SO MUCH the past week or two. Work is absolutely draining me. When I get home, I got nuthin'. NUTHIN'. And there's a 2 year old Bug who doesn't really get that. So I'm so glad Matt has been helping out and letting me lay down so I can find enough energy to somehow put together some dinner and make it until 9 for bed.

Which, of course, then consists of me laying there and tossing and turning for a few hours. Gotta love the way the body preps you for what's about to come, right? I'm lucky if I'm getting 5 hours of sleep now.

The good news is that Bean is still SMALLER than BUG. Yay! But don't get too excited. It's still big. Just not ginormous. Bean is approximately 7 1/2 pounds (give or take--these tend to be off at the end) which puts s/he somewhere in the range of 9 pounds at 40 weeks on my due date. Bug would have been over 10. Still better...but still large. What is it with me and large kids? Good thing I'm tall-ish....

Got a somewhat alarming call today on my voicemail--the doctor's office said there was "something with my ultrasound" and to "call them right away." Yeah. THAT'S a great way to have me hyperventilate and freak out in my classroom. Turns out it's that there's more fluid than normal up in thrrrrr, so, that means every week I get to go in for some fetal monitoring and stuff before my appointments. She swears up and down everything else is fine and this is just routine. So I'm trying to relax. Still hoping for this to be a natural start to labor, but obviously, Bean's health comes first. I should know more tomorrow.

On a somewhat related note, I've been having slight panics lately over the fact that (are you ready for this?) I'm about to have 2 kids.

Yes. TWO kids. Because I've had NINE MONTHS TO THINK ABOUT IT, but it's finally hitting me now. And I'm really scared.

Part of me feels like I am just getting the hang of one. What on earth am I doing adding another one?!?! (Those of you with 3, 4, or 18 kids, feel free to laugh) If you've been along for the ride for a while, you know this is standard operating procedure for me. Yes, my name is TriSaraTops, and I AM A WORRIER. I like to think of it as my tragic flaw. I'm getting better, though. I swear. ;)

Anyway...so, yeah. Two. How will I do two? Will I still be able to juggle everything? Teaching full-time? Being an athlete? And I'm reminded that I have felt this all before...that this, most definitely, is normal...ESPECIALLY for me. Whenever Negative Nellies like to tell me how "impossible" going from one to two is and how "you'll never have ANY time to yourself again" (yes, those are actual comments made to me in the past 2 weeks), it's a little intimidating. But that's them.

I'm not them.

I must consider the source.

My source handled things before, and damn well, if I do say so myself. Not that it wasn't hard from time to time. I definitely had my moments. But looking back at how scared I was for that first baby now, I realize how much I had in me in that moment and the moments after that I didn't even know back then.

So I'm hoping it will be the same this time around. Hereby granting myself wiggle room, in every aspect of life, though. But I did this once, and it made me and everything around me even better.

I can only hope for so much this time around, too. And in approximately 20 days, I'll find out.

Good news. Really.

So last night we got some good news.

Now, I don't speak Doctor, so this is totally unscientific and I might be screwing it up. But you'll get the basic idea.

Matt's mom is about to have her 3rd round (out of 6) of chemo. They did some bloodwork and found that whatever counts of bad cells (? see. I'm screwing this up already) there were related to the cancer in her blood are going down. WAY down. The doctor was very excited. I guess before she started the chemo, her counts were over 1,000. Now they are under 200. 35 is considered normal.

SO--this means that it appears her body is responding well to the chemo. Which is HUGE. And awesome.

Prayers and thoughts are working. Thank you, to those who have sent any up on account of us.

Three weeks from today will be my last day of work. It's so hard for me to go from complete work mode, where I'm veryveryveryfocused to STOP. Sometimes I feel that without me in room 221, then room 221 falls apart and THE! WORLD! ENDS! which is very silly but just how I roll. Kind of like how I feel about not doing any structured workouts, a nice hard track run, hard 400s in the pool, or a tempo ride. You know. I got over that, eventually, and when I get to do it again it's nice and new and all exciting all over. Usually the same is said for work, too.

Matt and I have the nursery all ready--little bitty yellow and green onesies and gowns ready to go, bouncy seat out (which, by the way, my 33 pound toddler still thinks he can get into--and it's hilarious), dog totally knows something is up and is NOT happy (so we're giving him lots of extra treats), and I am in full nesting mode with making stews and soups and food and trying to freeze what I can.

And I'm TIRED, yo. Seriously tired. I am having a rough time sleeping--MAJOR heartburn (maybe that means a full head of hair on this little bean again?), and lots of tossing and turning. But that all comes with the territory. Oh, and I probably shouldn't watch 24 right before I go to bed. Unless I want nightmares about Russian hit men coming to shoot me in the head.

So things are getting a little better...the pinky has healed nicely and although it's still quite angular, at least it's kind of almost back to normal. I can type with it, at least!

Been overwhelmed with the support of good friends these last 2 weeks...thanks to all, both on the interwebs here and my "real life" friends who have been checking on us, praying for us, and just being good people. You guys rock.

Tomorrow will be another swim with my Preggy Pals. Operation Can I Still Do Flip Turns at Almost 37 weeks is ON. Maybe I'll even try to get some video. Because that would just be good quality entertainment.

Good news, good news...good stuff.

Confessions

So, I have a confession to make.

2010 has not been kind to me so far. And it has very little to do with me chopping off my own pinky finger. Although I must admit that added to the situation.

I just heard even more bad news this evening, which makes last night's bad news even more emotional. And the news from the week before is still fresh in my mind. It's one of those weeks where I am literally afraid to even answer the phone, or now check my email. And I definitely can't look at the news right now.

I'm not much into talking about stuff here like this. I have been doing a very good job putting on the happy face at work over the past 2 weeks, so the kids don't know what's going on. But it's harder to put the happy face on here, since...well...you don't see my face. It's just my words and thoughts here. And I have a rough time not showing you those.

Last week, we found out about our good friend's brother who was killed in a car accident. Hit by a driver who was texting while driving. He lost control on an icy patch and slammed into the median. 25 years old. He was just starting to turn his life around, and his girlfriend is due with their child next week.

Last night, I found out we have another battle with cancer to wage in our family...one that we all thought was over. That we had won. Now the hard battle will be picked up again, but it's going to be very, very hard.

And just now I found out that a running and triathlon friend's wife passed away yesterday from a heart attack.

This, all on top of Matt's mom bravely fighting her cancer and in her third round of chemo.

Right now, I'm having a hard time accepting why bad things happen to good people. I don't understand it, but I do understand that I'm not supposed to. I need to make peace with that. Just when I feel like no one's there and I just want to go from my bedroom, to my classroom, and back home again, not talking to anyone that I am not required to talk to, several of my friends (who don't even know what's going on) have been calling and emailing me "just to check on me." I'm taking that as a reminder that someone does care up there. And I need to trust that everything will work out somehow.

The trouble is, since I'm 9 months pregnant I'm not sleeping well. I'm up often. And last night when I got up, I just thought about the horrible news we got yesterday, and I just kept crying. So, I'm really, really tired. All the time.

(Now would be a good time to remind me NOT to use my mandolin slicer, lest in my tired state I sever another digit. ;)

I'm not sure how much I'll want to talk here the next few weeks. Maybe I'll decide that writing here is a good thing. But I might disappear for a bit. I just don't know. I thought I'd explain what was going on, just in case I temporarily vanish.

The good news is that everything is fine with the baby, so I didn't want anyone to worry about that. But it's pretty much everything else around me that seems to be crashing in.

It's right about now that I wish I could go for a good, hard tempo run. With some Pantera. Or a 3 hour ride by myself. But I can't do any of those things.

So I'm focusing on yoga a lot, and hopefully will be swimming with my preggy pal JenC tomorrow morning. That should help. I can't go hard, but at least she can make me smile.

Somehow, someway, everything will work out.

What other stuff?

I was going to talk about some other stuff today, but all I can think about is Haiti.

I know I'm a little emotional being 9 months pregnant and all, but...wow.

I've definitely had my fair share of bad news these past few weeks, but it kind of all goes right out the window thinking about the sheer suffering happening there.

So for now, I'm sending all my thoughts and prayers in that direction.

I'm a planet.

I really love the movie Juno. Just last night I was telling Matt, "remember way back when we could go see movies in the theater?" Sigh. I do like movies, but with us trying to save money for baby we have resorted to reserving whatever happens to be available at the library.

And just like that my parents called today to see if we wanted to sneak out for a matinee of Invictus.

SUPER. excited.

We're heading out in just a few, and it will be nice to see a movie in the theater that I've really wanted to see.

On the training front...what training? What is this "working out" thing? MANNNNNN. I have been SOOOOOOOOOOOO tired after work that it's all I can do to sit in a chair with Bug and play play-doh, or, if I'm feeling really crap-tastic, I lay on the couch and we watch Elmo. I know. Not the best example, right? I keep telling myself this is temporary and if the weather wasn't so cold we'd be at the park at least. Sometimes I'll take him up to the library so he can play and I can sit, but it's been a rough week. I'm hoping I can hold on here the next 4 weeks of work. I have some serious AP grading to do this weekend and plan on timing that up with Bug's nap tomorrow. Those kids don't exactly get patient with their test grades, if you know what I mean! They're basically like a room full of me's. Very type-A. Very not understanding of what 9 months pregnant with a toddler means. (Which is good. Because they are 16.) So, I'm doing my best to keep up.

Today, however, was my return to the pool, in a ridiculously inappropriately miscast Baywatch red suit. I was so afraid I'd see someone I knew at the pool, besides my awesome preggy friends JenC and Bridget of course! They came all the way to my side of town to swim again, which was really nice of them. I was a little worried about what a month-hiatus or so, plus massive extra poundage would do. My upper body was all, "HUH?!" for the first 300 yards or so, and I had a really rough time catching my breath, but other than that it felt great! We did about 1200 yards which was all fine by me. And then, we hit the Original House of Pancakes again for PANCAKES. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM PANCAKES.

I know, I know--no pics = it didn't happen. But I'm sorry. I AM SO NOT GOING THERE. There will be NO documentation of me in this suit going on 9 months pregnant.

I am happy to report I was still able to flip turn! It wasn't pretty of course, but I could do it. Boo-ya!

Okay, off to a movie for the first time in maybe 6 months or so--yahoo! On tap this week will be prenatal yoga, some dreadmill walking, and trying not to fall asleep at my desk again during lunch.

23 Lesson Plans, and 1 Missing Pinky Tip

Last night, I decided to try out my fancy pants new mandolin slicer to make some yummy sweet potato chips. This is really the sole reason I wanted the slicer. I can never seem to slice sweet potatoes thinly enough, and I thought it would be a fun gadget.

It was. Until I sliced off the top of my pinky.

Safe to say I was in a bit of shock. My main concerns included turning the oven off, putting away the garlic, and telling Bug that Mommy was okay, Mommy was okay. All the while I tried not to look at the missing piece of my finger and pay little attention to the fact that blood was gushing all over the place.

Matt's Dad came over to watch Bug and Matt and I got in the car. Then I just let loose. F bombs galore, lots of tears, and ridiculous statements about how "I can't even carry Bug anymore, can't even carry the laundry up the stairs, and now I can't even make a nice dinner." I was, moreover, furious with myself for being so freaking stupid and not paying attention to what I was doing. It was serious enough that I was really scared. I actually wondered if I could still play the piano as well.

Thankfully, I didn't hit bones or any nerves. I was in and out of the ER in about 30 minutes--I guess it pays to be a bleeder! I should be okay in 7-10 days, and I'm getting pretty good at typing with 9 fingers and becoming a de facto lefty for a few days.

I've been doing a pretty good job taking things day by day lately. In some ways, this pregnancy is so much easier that way. I know now that I won't be two tons forever, that the races will be there when I'm ready, and that I might even get faster. But believe me...I have my moments.

Like when the nurse accidentally told me my weight last week. Despite the huge "DO NOT TELL" warning on my file. They might as well put, "ABSOLUTE FREAKING HEADCASE--SERIOUSLY, DON'T GO THERE" on it. But she did. And I heard.

And I freaked.

Pretty much the same as before. Which, after a few tears and yes, a few f-bombs alone in my car, makes sense. My body is just going to do what it needs to do. I. have. little. control. over. that.

Let.

go.

already.

It doesn't mean I'm doing things wrong. It just means I'm doing what I need to do. Sometimes that means being creative. Although, true creativity doesn't involve missing pinkies usually, but whatever.

Luckily, I got most of my school work done pre-pinky incident, so I can relax and enjoy this last day off here. I also planned most of my lessons until Friday, February 12th, which will be the last day if I don't go early (which it looks like I will definitely avoid a 39-week induction--YAY!). With a week of midterm exams and a teacher work day in there, that left me with--at MOST--23 days of lessons.

23 days. I can handle that.

Then it's off for 12 weeks, and finishing off a few weeks at the end doing my favorite lessons of the year anyway.

I can do this. Even if I screw up, I can do this.

And hopefully my screw-ups won't involve any more missing digits.

Y2010

Remember all that Y2K stuff?

I found all my old pictures from that. Had to laugh--my Cleveland buddies all came down to visit me in Cincinnati and we went out to this bar in Mount Adams. I remember drinking green fruity drinks and seeing fireworks over the Ohio River and being 22. It was my first year teaching...I still had my OSU law school application stuff in my apartment because I really didn't think I'd make it through that first year of teaching. I was dating some random guy from Kentucky--should have known it would never work as he was a UK fan. (Ew.)

Remember all that "new century" hype? And how everyone thought the world might end at midnight because computer glitches might make our ATMs freeze up? Oh, the horror.

It turns out the real day the world changed forever would be a sunny Tuesday morning in September, a little over a year and a half away.

I forgot, almost completely, that this would be a new decade tomorrow. And let's be honest--2000-2009 hasn't been the greatest decade for my country. 9/11, two wars, the worst recession since the crash of 1929, Katrina. It's pretty depressing, actually. And even more so when you factor in the world. Darfur. The tsunami. Iran.

I'm gonna stop now, before I get sick to my stomach.

But despite that, I have to say that this has been a wonderful decade for me.

I finally let go of some things that had to be let go of, and should have years prior.

I spent two weeks in Germany as an Armonk Scholar and got to see things no punk kid who is 23 should ever be lucky enough to see.

I re-met my husband. I say "re-met," because we had known each other ever since he took me to Homecoming my sophomore year. But we met again, and this time at just the right time.

I became a James Madison Fellow, and it allowed me to earn another degree that I put lots of blood, sweat, and tears into. I earned those two letters, "M.A.," for sure.

I married my best friend.

I fell in love with my career, despite all the challenges it continually throws at me. And because of those challenges.

I became an Ironman.

I fell in love again with my little man in October of 2007, and more and more every day since.

This year will bring challenges, no doubt. A long and hard battle with cancer in our family is one that is ongoing.

But I am just about 6 weeks away from falling in love all over again. Two of my close friends are getting married this year, and I'm going to be a part of both of their big days. Several of my close friends are expecting. I get to race again. I still have a fantastic job that I enjoy going to.

I still can't help feeling like I'm 22 a bit--staring at the stars over the Ohio River, surrounded by my friends and wondering what the future will hold.

I still feel like I'm the luckiest girl on the face of the earth.

52 and Raining

Just got finished watching the World Championships.

About 2 weeks ago, when I was driving my car home from work, the temperature registered as 52 degrees on my dashboard. It was raining pretty hard, and also pretty windy. Unseasonably warm for Cleveland in December, and the wind reminded me that it was in fact, a fluke. It wasn't supposed to be 52 and raining. It wouldn't be for long.

Whenever I see 52 and raining, it takes me back to that day. The day that was also, in essence, a fluke. I remember the months of training...deliberately waiting until 1pm in July when it was a good 84 degrees or so to start my long run. "So I can be ready," I thought. Because it's always, always hot and humid in Madison.

Except when it wasn't.

I remember the emotions of that day: the profound disappointment, extreme pain, gratitude for my friends and family and their support, love for my most loyal fan Matt, fear of the unknown and of 5:30pm and of cutoffs, belief in myself, and utter, sheer joy when I crossed that line.

I remember this:

For me, Ironman is not a one-time event. I just know I'll be back there someday. I don't know where, exactly. And I definitely don't know when. But I can say with 100% certainty that it will not be anytime soon. For me, I just respect the race too much to do that. I know what I, personally, would need to do to get there, and I have no--and I really mean this--NO desire to sacrifice what I'd need to sacrifice at this moment to get to that start line...let alone the finish line again. Some can get by on a lot less training than I could, and that rocks. But for me to do it the way I'd want to do it, it would take a lot of major, major sacrificing. And I really, truly believe that about 90% of completing an Ironman is wanting to complete an Ironman.

But just knowing that I will get to that finish line again someday is pretty exciting.

And it might not be 52 degrees and raining again. Maybe this time it will be 90 degrees and humid. Or 65 and cloudless. Or whatever. Who cares? Because that's not really the point.

Ironman is about learning who you are and what you are made of.

AVERAGE!

YAY!

Usually, I am not one to celebrate average-ness. But today at the ultrasound, I got word that my little bean is right around the 50th percentile in size. Approximately 4 pounds, 1 ounce, to be exact. And this is EXCELLENT news.

I am about 31.5 weeks. Jackson at 36 weeks was an estimated 8 pounds, 5 ounces.

So there's your frame of reference.

The doctor said he doesn't THINK I'll be looking at another 10 pounder here, but obviously anything can happen. I'll have one more ultrasound around 36/37 weeks just to be sure, but this was the best news we could have gotten today. So we're pretty pumped!

Plus, it's just fun to see the baby on the screen. I get to see the little person who has been BACKING THAT BUM UP against my belly, like, nonstop for about 3 days. And if I do say so myself, it's a cute little bum shaker.

One step closer in my goal of avoiding both an induction and a C-section. Of course, I know a lot could happen and it's not all up to me. But this was pretty good news!

Now, for a trail run tomorrow with JenC and B! Preggers, UNITE. Hopefully I can actually still run--I haven't tried since the 5K and have just been walking and doing yoga.

But, most assuredly, pancakes WILL be consumed at the end.

Oh yes. They will.

Baby Sasquatch?

So far...no.

I have taken the liberty to NOT LOOK at the doctor's every time I get weighed. Seriously. I close my eyes, announce I'm not looking, and don't look. It just messes with my head too much.

The last two times, my doc has said, "Can I tell you how much you've gained?"

My response has been "NO" both times. Very emphatically.

So today, she asked again..."Seriously...can I tell you?"

NO WAY.

"Well, is it okay...?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yes. You're fine!"

Whew.

So, I definitely don't FEEL like I look like I did with Bug at 32 weeks, but that was the dead middle of a very humid Ohio August. And record breaking temps that September (in my non-air conditioned classroom. Which was AWESOME, by the way). I am still able to wear my rings, I don't really have cankles (yet), and I haven't blown up quite like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man like I did last time.

So here's hoping.

I will be having an ultrasound tomorrow to "see what we're working with" (my doctor's quote). Doc said last month and this month that I'm not measuring "particularly big," which is very good. And important. I'm hoping to avoid both A) an induction (because now I know what that means...and it is NOT FUN) and B) a C-section if at all possible. Obviously, I don't have a crystal ball, and I understand anything can happen in a delivery room. I'm just hoping that I'm on track for a nice, healthy baby who's hopefully not 6'4 and 22o. I don't ask for much.

At Bug's 36 week ultrasound, he was already measuring 8 pounds, 5 ounces. And that, my friends, is when I knew I was in BIG TROUBLE.

So, crossing fingers here...I've been able to be active still and am eating as clean as I can (except for my RIDICULOUS sweet tooth--that's clearly not very clean at all), so I know I'm doing everything in my power to bake a healthy bean. The rest, quite frankly, isn't up to me.

But I sure am excited to see the little one on that screen tomorrow morning. Two months from today is the approximate day I'll meet Bug's little bro or sis.

I'm gettin' pretty excited. :)

A HUUUUUGGGGGGGGEEEEE PR!

Huge being ME, of course.

So I ran the Reindeer Run 5K FASTER today than I ran the Turkey Dash 5K 10 days ago! WOOT! Not sure how I pulled that off, as I thought I'd definitely need to do LOTS of walking. I think yoga is really helping with my back and strength, though! That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

It was so fun to be at a race again--I wish there were a few more but the next local 5K isn't until the Chili Bowl which I'm pretty sure is, like, the week before I'm due. And going into labor on the course might not be the best idea.

Pretty darn proud of myself for running through 30 weeks. I'm going to keep on keepin' on here until it doesn't feel good and isn't fun anymore, and then I'll stick with walking, yoga, and swimming. Although I must admit, my choice of suit to replace my extremely low and borderline indecent 2 piece is...um...interesting. I'm too cheap to get an expensive maternity suit, so I ordered a cheap one piece in the biggest size I could find for $25 on clearance at Dick's. The only trouble is that they didn't have black. So I got my favorite color, red.

And now, folks, I look like the most horribly miscast actress on Baywatch EVER.

Basically, I look like this. EXCEPT NOT AT ALL.

But whatever. 2 more months, right? I can look ridiculous for 2 more months. I'm pretty sure I look ridiculous often, anyway, so no big whoop.

Here's a few pics from this morning...

All the crew at the Original House of Pancakes afterwards! ESpeed not only PRd today, but WON THE RACE! Yay! And, technically, there are 13 people in this picture... :)

There were actually 5 of us running who were pregnant! I am the farthest along, but JenC's not too far behind me!

Me and JenC

Hooray for running buddies, and especially hooray for my preggers running buddies who paced me to a blazing fast PR today! :) You guys rock!

Because it's SUPER FUN TO TORTURE YOURSELF

\So what do I decide to pull out last night?

The book I bought when I was first preggers with Bug.

Core Performance: Endurance.

Why? Why anything about CORE right now?

My core is seriously obliterated. Sigh.

All kidding aside, the book outlines some great stuff about strength and nutrition. I am happy to say I've been pretty good on the nutrition front (minus the Pumpkin French Toast I had with JenC last Saturday...but come on, could you pass that up?!) lately. I still have a sweet tooth like nobody's business, but I've been really trying to focus on whole grains and clean food.

I guess I'm just trying to research as much as I can about strength training: preferably in short bursts where you still get a lot of output. Because if I want to do everything I am planning on next season, I will need to get my strength back. I'm not really a spring chicken anymore, right? After two pregnancies, if I'm not good about strength and core, I'm a bit worried about the "I" word.

You know, the thing I never really have had too much trouble with.

That makes you miss races and stuff.

That rhymes with "Schminjury."

That hurts.

That I won't mention right here, for fear I jinx it.

Okay, enough about that. I have been making the tastiest oatmeal this week and have to share. I made gingerbread waffles Sunday morning for Bug and Matt (they really aren't too unhealthy--I swear) and had some leftover pumpkin puree. So I've been using it to make Pumpkin Oatmeal! Super quick and easy, and literally is holding off my appetite until my 4th period lunch, which I wasn't sure anyone or anything could do. Here's how I make it:

1 cup water
1/2 cup of oatmeal

Nuke for 1:45.

Then, mix in:

2 T pumpkin puree
a handful of craisins
a dash of nutmeg
a few sprinkles of cinnamon
just a teensy bit of brown sugar to sweeten a bit

MMMMMMMMMMMMMM. If you're a pumpkin fan, you MUST try this.

Stay tuned for the last installment of "Pregnant chicks running 5ks" this weekend! I'm making some signs for our backs...any funny sayings I should put on them? I threw the gauntlet up on my facebook account and got some great responses!

LOL for the week

Okay, this is too funny and I had to share...

Last night, while picking up a few things at the store, I decided to get some beer for my buddies who were coming over to watch Bruno with me.

(By the way--quite possibly the most DISTURBING MOVIE EVER. My retinas are still burning. But I laughed. I must admit, that sadly, I laughed. And laughed often.)

So I get to the checkout line, and here I am, all 7 months pregnant in a big puffy vest, and...

I GET CARDED.

I started laughing. As if it wasn't funny enough for me to be buying beer at 7 months pregnant...now I get carded for the first time in a while?!?! I told her she just made my night. She claimed she didn't even realize I was pregnant! I was like, SERSLY? Do you SEE this watermelon I'm smuggling under here?!?! I guess the puffy vest did a good job of hiding The Bump.

So the moral of the story is, that just when you think you're done getting carded because you are 32, you really can appear to others as a 20 year old who is massively knocked up and buying beer.

In running news, I had a FABULOUS run with my fellow preggers friend, JenC, yesterday! We did 3 miles on the muddy trails and it just flew by! Then, we hit First Watch for some Pumpkin French Toast. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM it was tasteeeeeeeeeeeeee. JenC's even going to join me tomorrow night for prenatal yoga! WOO HOO!

Next week, tune in as I do my final 5K of the pregnant season at the Reindeer Run with quite a pregnant crew! It should be a blast--and followed by pancakes of course!

Stay classy, and be sure to carry your IDs at all times...

Race Report: Turkey Dash 5K

I know, I know...it's been since May around here that I've had a race report! This one was definitely a different kind of race, fo' sho'. It was kinda funny to get ready for a race knowing it would be your slowest ever. I did do a 5K when I was about 18 weeks pregnant last time around and it was slow, but I was pretty confident that this one would include many walk breaks, so I'd be lucky to finish in 45 minutes or so.

Went to the doc's yesterday for my appointment, and there was good news. All is well with baby, and so far I'm not measuring particularly big for 28 weeks. This is very good, as from what I hear and what doc says, second babies tend to be bigger. And given that Bug would have been over 10 pounds had I gone to my due date, this is troublesome.

(And by that I mean that this kid MIGHT BE ABLE TO DRIVE ME HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL kind of troublesome.)

I'm once again hoping to avoid a C-section if possible, and a baby of a bit less-gargantuan size (but just as healthy, please!) would help me out there. Doc's ordered an ultrasound on December 18th and one again when I'm 37-38 weeks to "see what we're working with." Then, we can make some decisions from there, regarding inductions (boo--now I know what that means, and it's no fun) and C-sections (which I hope to avoid like the plague. Or at the very least the swine flu).

So I was happy to hear all was well and that so far baby isn't a sasquatch. But I am pretty big, and I knew this would still be a slow race.

All picture credits to TriSaraDad!

Karen Nakon lost her battle with breast cancer on her 38th birthday. She wanted to start a foundation to raise money to help support families that are going through breast cancer, since the Komen foundation does such a great job at research. And that's how her foundation began. Karen was diagnosed with cancer while pregnant with her 3rd child, Madison. My mom taught Madison in pre-school while Karen was fighting the disease. From what my Mom says, Karen was just the kindest, most caring parent around and a wonderful person. It's always our favorite race to do every year in her memory, and we are so happy to see how this race has grown over the past few years! With my cousin Judy being a breast cancer survivor, it is especially meaningful for me to give to such a wonderful cause.

Got all decked out in my black yoga pants, one of Matt's long-sleeve tech tees, and of course my favorite pregnant running shirt, and got ready to start with TriSaraMom.

Caption on my shirt reads, "Does this baby make me look fat?"

My BIGGEST fear this race? That I would have to pee within 8 minutes of starting and be forced to grovel, beg, and plead to some random homeowners to use their bathrooms. Or bushes. Or whatever I could find. Lately my runs have been up to the library, peeing, and then back home. So I wasn't sure if Baby would let me actually go for 3.1 miles without making me pee my pantalones. Sometimes when I run it's fine, but other times, Baby decides to use my bladder as a trampoline. I crossed my fingers and headed to the start...after 3 potty breaks in the 20 minutes leading up to the race.

TriSaraMom pins my number on The Bump while I'm waiting for my 2nd potty break BEFORE the race

I got to see a few buddies at the start, including my friend Peter, and my awesome running/tri buddies TriEric and his wife, Aimee, with our running friend DS Racer. TriEric suggested I should change my shirt to say, "Does this baby make me look FAST?" Too funny! And DS Racer said, "You know...you really should stick to Bud LIGHT." Made me laugh!

DS Racer telling me to stick to Bud Light! Buddy, I wish I could have a nice cold ANYTHING right now...!

TriEric, Me and The Bump, DS Racer, and Aimee before the start

It was a nice 45-50 degrees or so which was PERFECT for me as I tend to overheat anyway. I settled into a little shuffle pace and my Mom was nice enough to run with me despite my protests. I didn't want to hold her back!

My iPod made me laugh several times (yes, I wore an iPod for a 5K...I was afraid it would be a long, lonely run, okay?) by playing SexyBack by Justin Timberlake and Bigger Than My Body by John Mayer. First of all, I am most definitely NOT bringing sexy back right now. So that made me actually laugh out loud. Second of all, if "I'm bigger than my body gives me credit for," than I am THE SIZE OF GREENLAND.

That's me on the far left. As if you couldn't tell which one of these runners was not like the other ones....

I kept waiting to either pee my pants or have to walk, but neither one seemed to be happening! Score! My pace must have been just about right.

We got to the two mile marker and the volunteer said, "25:40." And that also made me laugh, because of every 5K I've ever run in my life, be it at the end of a sprint tri or a standalone race, that was slower than ALL BUT TWO. My first 5K ever, when I was a chubby and very much out of shape senior in college, and the one I ran 18 weeks preggers with Bug. Hee hee! I was gonna do this up in slow style, alright. Instead of trying to pick off runners in front of me or glancing at everyone's calves to see what age group they're in, I found myself trying to pick off panting golden retrievers or people pushing jogging strollers with multiple children in them. Hey, whatever works, right?

But the funny thing is that there were plenty of people around me. I thought I might literally be last, but that was so far from the truth. Lots of people were running with their kids, run/walking, or just running slow like me. So my fears of being alone never came true, which was nice. We were all out there, supporting a great cause, and enjoying the sunny Thanksgiving morning.

I thought of how many people sacrifice this Thanksgiving, like all our men and women serving overseas. I thought of people who didn't have their health to even be able to walk a 5K, let alone run one 28 weeks pregnant. And I thought of my mother-in-law, who will be starting chemotherapy next week to battle Stage 4 cancer. All of that made every single step seem easy.

TriSaraMom and I running to the finish line...I was so excited that I didn't have to walk at all! Victory!

Before I knew it, we were at the end! The clock said somewhere around 39ish minutes. I was very happy with that! A far cry from my PR of 23:33, but as far as I know, I was First Overall Female in the 28 week-pregnant division.

I patted my belly and gave my Mom a high-five. We all did it!

And for once, at the end of a 5K, neither one of us felt like puking. Bonus!

Thanks, Baby, for letting mama have a great race! You will be rewarded with massive amounts of carbs and pumpkin pie today. Feel free to kick away. You've earned it.

And now, for your daily dose of SMILE

Do ya think if we start a petition they'd bring back The Muppet Show? Because seriously. Has there BEEN a better show on television?

EVER?



It's been a long 2 weeks over here. I'm looking forward to a nice Thanksgiving to celebrate with family. And that little ditty was just the thing to kick off my little vacation.

Hope you enjoyed it, too!

Back with more regularly scheduled stuff soon--including--wait for it--A RACE REPORT! Yes, I'll be doing a 5K at the Nakon Foundation Turkey Dash Thursday morning. Very fitting as I went to a memorial service today for my student's mother who passed away from a long battle with breast cancer at the young age of 48.

I have so much to be thankful for.

Smile, everybody...life is short. And life is so good.

First swim in....uh....about 8 weeks

What, you got a problem with that?

Squeezing into my TYR 2 piece tankini kinda reminded me of a scene from the classic drama, Tommy Boy...


Except it's more like Big Girl in a Little Suit. And so far, it hasn't ripped. So that's good. But the top is definitely a little bit low for my liking. Anyone have any leads on some maternity suits--NOT just swimming suits, but more like competition style? I got this one out of the grab bag at SwimOutlet.com and I don't know if it will make it to January!

So I went a mile. In 200 yard increments. I forgot how swimming is hard if you take 2 months off! But the good news is that it felt FABULOUS! Way better than some dumb elliptical. I think I'll shoot for 2-3 times a week at the pool after the 5K, and supplement with some trainer rides and walk/jogs on the dreadmill if it's icy and outside if it's not.

So, that was definitely the slowest mile of my life. But on the bright side, I can jump in the pool 26 weeks pregnant after an 8 week pool hiatus and just whip off a mile. Not bad.

Was trying for 2000 yards but got a late start and still needed to hit the Nature's Bin before I headed up to Parent-Teacher Conferences from 1-8:30 tonight. Then I made some tasty couscous with black beans, scallions, and tomatoes and DEVOURED some. Swimming always makes me HUNGRY!

The weather is still nice around here, so I'm hoping to try for a run tomorrow or Saturday!

Yippeeeyippeeeyahooooooooooooooooo

Reasons why today rocked:

1. I finished grading all my DBQs. In case you're wondering, the grand total was just shy of 8 hours. EIGHT. HOURS. Sheesh.

2. I won 3 nice Gap Maternity Sweaters and 2 cute tops for work on eBay in 2 separate bidding wars. Because I'm awesome like that. Got a super good deal on all of them. Sweet!

3. The little bean let me have the BEST! RUN! EVER! this afternoon. Well, best run while pregnant, we should say. Whereas I had to take lots of walk breaks yesterday, today I was just smokin' along at my blazing 12-13 minute pace! Yahooooooooooo! (Okay, it felt fast. Work with me.) I ran to the library, peed, took 3 sips of water in the drinking fountain, and ran home. It was FABULOUS!

4. Bug and I played a game of hide and seek today and he was laughing hysterically every time I jumped out and yelled "BOO!" It pretty much rocked. It was 70 degrees again here so we took full advantage.

4. Just got home from prenatal yoga and now I'm all relaxed and chill. Time for a shower and bed, after my required reading of What to Expect when You're Expected. I seriously laugh out loud when I'm reading it. Written by a writer on the Daily Show and Colbert Report. You're in for a treat, I promise.

I wish every day could be as rockin' as this Monday was!

Operation Make It To Thanksgiving

Got my first run in almost a month in yesterday!

Sunny, almost 70 degrees. Awesome. I know there won't be too many more days like this in C-Town, so I knew I had to take full advantage.

Since getting smacked in the face and sucker punched by the Stupid Swine, I haven't been able to do much. I slowly eased back into things this week with some elliptical work, my awesome prenatal yoga class, and some walking. So I wasn't sure how this run would feel.

The answer: good. And not good.

For those minutes here and there that I don't feel pregnant, it's awesome. I don't wear a watch (that would be too depressing) so I just run by how I feel. I love how running reminds me of who I am.

The trouble is, I don't feel like that all the time. I ran the first half mile without stopping, and then Baby Z decided to let me know s/he was there. It's funny how much things change in a month. Probably because I'm significantly bigger than I was last month, but I can really feel the tightening in my belly that reminded me of why I stopped about this time with Jackson. But once I took a 3-5 house walk break or so, and started up again for a few more blocks, I'd always feel better.

When all was said and done, it was a very slow 2 miles. Normally, 2 miles is a warmup for a tempo run. Sigh. However, I have to remember that I'm about 26 weeks pregnant here. 2 miles is still more than a lot of people do every day. So, I'm hoping to hold steady at 2-3 miles of run/walking here and ease my way back up to the 5K mark. I doubt I'll be able to run the entire Turkey Dash 5K, and I'm fine with that. I'll just be happy to be at a race, and I'm kind of excited to just be out there and still able to run at all given that according to my pregnancy journal I stopped about 3 weeks ago when I was preggers with Bug.

I'm wondering if I can transition to some swimming after Thanksgiving? The trouble with swimming, as I've stated before, is that I do not have a 50 meter pool in my basement. Therefore, with Bug running around like crazy all the time, it's hard to fit the pool in. Hence why my swim times have remained stagnant since I had him, yet my cycling and running times dropped dramatically. I'm thinking if I can take him to the Kid's Cove gym babysitting and just do a half hour of laps, that might be worth it. I could do the elliptical, too, but I just hate that stupid thing. Swimming would definitely be more fun, albeit more of a hassle.

I already had a great walk with my 2 buddies and our collective 3 (going on 5!) kids this morning. I'm thinking I might need a run break to pull myself away from the massive amounts of DBQs I have to grade, and the weather is picture perfect again. Maybe I'll see if I can do my warm-up-I-mean-run this afternoon. We'll see how it goes!

This Is Just To Say

I remember being 17, sitting in my AP English class, and loving this poem.

Sometimes you just have to say what's on your mind.

This is just to say
that cancer is scary and awful and
I am very afraid

And I'm trying as hard as I can
to stay positive
but I don't have a good track record
with cancer versus people that I love

And it's bringing up old feelings
of grief and fear
and remembering people that I've lost
and it's hard

Some days are harder than others
and today is one of those days

...and that is all.

Taking Inventory

Stuff I really miss now that I'm pregnant:

1. A nice cold beer during a football game.

2. A nice cold beer during a bonfire.

3. A nice glass of wine with dinner.

4. Full-strength coffee.

5. Yummy cold cuts that are actually cold.

6. Not having to roll out of bed to get up in the morning.

7. A nice, hard, tempo run.

8. Going 20+ mph down the road on my bike.

9. My rear end being it's usual size.

10. Not having thunder thighs.

11. Having normal sized shirts.

12. Being able to paint my own toenails without any trouble.

13. Two words: ALLERGY MEDICINE.

Things that make it all worth it:

1. My healthy baby.

2. My Bug learning new words every day.

3. Kisses and hugs and thinking about having double of all of them.

4. Knowing with 100% certainty that I will be able to swim, bike, and run again, and probably faster.

5. All of this: