Seriously. Please tell my head it's NOVEMBER.

Why can't I stop thinking about tris?

What has gotten into me?

Here are a few theories:

1. I am working my butt off. Working through most lunches while grading, grading late at night, finding some sweet new lessons for my APs and trying to really integrate my new iPads I got through my grant for World. This is good, but makes me really tired.

2. My kids have a level of energy that would make a squirrel on about 19 shots of espresso look slow.

3. I miss throwing my energy into races. I enjoy where I'm putting my energy now, but I do miss a good, hard, last mile at the end of a tri where I'm chasing someone or some goal. I heart that, and I haven't really had it since August (save the 5K where I accidentally broke my 9 year old PR for literally no rational reason).

So, I emailed Ana to see if I could talk her into something crazy--doing Rev3 Cedar Point with me next year. And you know her response?

"Oh my goodness...this would take some TJ (husband) convincing. Are you sure I won't drown?"

To which I thought, SHE DIDN'T SAY NO! VICTORY IS MINE!

Now here's the problem. Since early September I've been acting pretty much like a duathlete. Which a duathlete, I am not, people. I am a triathlete through and through. So I MUST get back in the pool. But how?

Sigh.

I have to make this work somehow. Some ideas I'm tossing around:

1. Picking one morning a week to go before school but I'd have to go straight to school. This requires a good deal of coordination on my end (bags, breakfast, lunch, clothes, etc.) and would not be fun for Matt since he'd have to get both kids out of the house solo by 7:00am which he's really good at but still it's kind of a headache. Four hands from 6:45am-7:00am are really almost a necessity.

2. Pick one day after school and go directly from school, hopping in the water sometime around 3:40, so I can be home by dinner. Pros--relatively convenient for Matt and I . Cons--I just hate spending more time away from the kids after school, even if it is one measly hour.

3. Go at night, after Bean is in bed and while Bug is getting put to bed. Judging by the schedule, this would need to be probably Monday or Wednesday. Pros: no missing time with Bug or Bean and easiest on Matt. Cons: OMG, do you understand how HARD it is to get motivated to head OUT to swim at 8pm? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I've been running, riding, and lifting mostly at night or in the wee hours of the morning lately. Realistically, I think Option 3 is probably my best bet. But man, that's gonna be hard. I'm going to need someone to hold me accountable. DO YOU HEAR ME, INTERWEBS?

I'm going to keep doing some thinking, crunching, and pool-scheduling research, but my goal is to get back in the water in December. I need to put the tri back in this athlete.

My Open Water Fishies

Well, my bike is still...in limbo, so to speak, so I've been swimming, running, and hanging at the beach lots this week. And these kids LOVE the beach. And I love that they get to grow up enjoying living down the street from this like I did.

And this girl comes from a long line of talkers...can you tell?

Anxiously awaiting some big news that I can't wait to share! Happy training and racing this weekend!

Ramping up!

Okay, no time for rest, it's RACE SEASON, BABY!

And, in the ultimate weirdness of the universe, my leg feels SO MUCH BETTER now. What? Seriously? Because if all I needed to do was RUN MORE...dude, I would have done that a long time ago. It's still a bit tight so I'm stretching and foam rolling like an insane person, but I feel like it's finally going in the right direction instead of getting worse. Maybe I can still have some fun on the run in these last few tris!

Monday I spun easy on the trainer, Tuesday I did a swim, short run to test out my new racing flats (SO cool--happy birthday to me! Thanks, Little Brother M and Mom and Dad!), and then lifted because after seeing my race pics I felt like Flabby McFlabberston. What is the deal with race pictures? Do they put a "fugly" lens on just for me or is that universal? The bike pics are fine--I have no problem with those, and in fact some are quite badass. But the swim and run? WOW. I am not sure it's possible to take a more hilariously un-flattering picture if you tried. Of course, I'm working on trying to post a few here so bear with me. You have to see these. The run ones are exquisite.

Yesterday I ran easy with Ana and it felt pretty good. The quads are still a little tired from the race, but I was just happy to not feel as tight or as much pain. Score!

Today, I decided to forego the pool (much to Ana and Laura's dismay--they are not into the open-water thing) and head to meet a few people at an open water swim. Let me just say that sometimes I forget how freaking awesome where I live is. Yeah, the winters are a bit on the snowy side and stuff, but I live about two blocks away from here:

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah. I love it. Except, wait...do you see those waves there?

Yeah, the ones crashing into the wall in that second shot? Um, those suckers were 4-6 feet.

We all gulped a bit and said, "Here goes!" And, hey! I finally got to have that swim at Steelhead that was cancelled! Because these conditions were probably the same if not a bit worse. But you know what? I had a BLAST.

There's just something about swimming in open water, especially when there's a sunrise like that. Need to sight? Just look at downtown and see Terminal Tower. Or use the sun as your guide. Yeah, my time was crap and I got thrown all over the place and my buddy Ken ran into what we think was a log the size of a telephone pole since it was so freaking wavy. Yeah, I got a whitecap to the face that did have me shaken a bit. No WAY would I ever have allowed Ana to have this as her first Open Water Swim--she'd be drifting to Canada probably by now since the waves made it virtually impossible to swim. But the four of us felt like rockstars when we were done. Because if you can swim a mile in that like we did, then you can handle ANYTHING on race day.

And that is exactly why it's so important to get in.

Money in the bank mentally for my next two swims. I'm determined to have a better showing in the next few races in the water. Looking forward to a solid weekend of training and getting ready to race the Huntington Sprint on the 24th. A sprint?! How do you race those things again? I have one speed--70.3. I'm going to have to find another gear here and quickly!

Summer is pretty much awesome. And that is all.

Yes. That's it.

I've re-discovered something through all this running I did all spring.

Something was just missing.

Don't get me wrong...I loved running (most of the time) and really did enjoy pushing myself in the marathon. I tried my best to take setbacks in stride. I kicked my own butt on a daily basis, especially with those cursed Yassos. I dreamed big, and I went for it. And that was painful, but awesome.

But something was missing.

And over the past two weeks or so, I've found it.

I am, most definitely, a triathlete.

There's just something about the quiet calm of laps in the pool, the burning arms during a harder set, and 41 miles on a quiet morning with a friend.

Yes, that's better.

Exhale.

Another year, another season

Whew!

Up for air. Finally.

I am sitting at home in an empty house at the moment, which happens about, oh, twice a year. It's absolutely glorious. I have nothing on the docket today except to see my good friend's beautiful new baby boy and to head to graduation tonight.

Another school year, in the books!

I can hardly believe I've been doing this 12 years now. I really was a baby when I started. Barely older than my students.

You know what? I am so NOT barely older than my students now. And I LOVE IT. I love, love, love not being the "young teacher" anymore. I'm not quite a veteran, but I'm hovering somewhere in the middle. Or, let's be honest, the way things are going in my state I won't be able to retire until I'm about 80, so maybe I'm earlier in my career than it seems. There's a certain level of difficulty that automatically comes with being a young teacher, and I'm very, very content to say that I'm past that now. It's kind of nice.

The end of school was loco. For a good reason, though. I dreamed pretty big back in January and wrote a grant for 15 iPads so that I could have my students create oral histories and "mini-documentaries" on different aspects of local history with the ultimate goal of having them end up here, on this super awesome app: www.clevelandhistorical.org Which you should check out. Although you may not find it all that interesting if you're not from Cleveland, but it's pretty freaking cool. All the content is user-created with oral histories narrating the story of various landmarks here in the NEO.

Never in a million zillion billion years did I think I'd get this grant.

Except I did!

Which is super amazing. But the equipment didn't come in until early May, so we literally had 3 weeks to throw together this project: learning the equipment and programs, scheduling and conducting 19 interviews, editing and selecting images from the Library of Congress or local archives, AND presenting. And grading. And....let's just say, my kids rose to the challenge, and although we had lots of bugs along the way, I am SO PROUD of what they created. They did awesome. If I get the permissions that I need, I'll post a few links here for you to see. I can't wait to continue this next year!

So now I'm getting ready to really get into a new tri season, but I've definitely had a few bumps on the road. My right hamstring (the one that seized up on me often during the marathon) has still been really tight. It's been bothering me when I'm running, so Coach Emily has really ramped me down. I'm hoping that with some continued yoga and easy runs, I can ramp it up back here soon. What fun is short course if I don't get to hammer?

That being said, not sure if that 5K in 2 weeks is in the cards. Eyeing one on July 4th, but not sure I could hammer it and still be okay for Lifetime. We'll see--a lot will depend on now this stupid hamstring feels.

In other news, I SWAM! And it sucked. But it should, for dear internet, I have not swam since JANUARY. Boooooo. That's no good at all. Really, someone needs to install a pool in my basement and then I'd be fine. Anyway, I still eked out 2000 yards, which is a reminder that I can wing it in the swim, however, just because I can does NOT mean that I should. I am looking forward to getting in the pool and open water here pretty often over the next few weeks.

I am getting my bike legs back a little bit, which is nice. And I have completely turned Ana into a riding buddy! I'm right--that girl will do just about anything. I may be creating a monster.

Looking forward to this bizarre thing called "free time," although after today I will have two little bugs running around and giggling like crazy, so I'm going to enjoy this rare solo quiet house while it lasts.

Happy Training!

A Little Bit Jealous.

My swimmer kids have been coming to class, tired, wet-haired, sniffly, and grumpy. It's swim season again around here, and our high school team is always pretty loaded with talent. Yesterday they were all dressed up for their first meet--ties for the boys, dresses and skirts for the girls. Fancy-schmancy shoes. I was sure to ask each one what their event was, and cringed if it was anything over 100 yards. Cuz short and painful is how I roll, yo.

I have to admit I'm a little jealous.

They are whining a bit, but I know deep down they love it. They wouldn't subject themselves to the dryland, the 6am swims, the 5,000 yard workouts, if they didn't really love it.

One thing I do regret about high school was giving up swimming. I quit swimming year-round when I was 14 for (of all things...gulp...I'm so embarrassed to type this) cheerleading and softball. Yeah. But a lot of it was that our school didn't have a pool so it required a lot of travel time, and swimming is the kind of sport that unless you give it 100%, your times get slower and slower and slower. And also, there were quite a few people on the team in my class that had tormented me in middle school, and I was kind of over them, and DEFINITELY didn't want to spend extra time of my life with them. That seems like a silly reason now, but when you're 14 and had spent the past 2-3 years being relentlessly bullied, it seemed quite fine thank you very much.

So now I see my swimmer kids, all tired and chlorine-y and grumpy, and I just want to trade places with them for a day. Because literally all they do is swim, eat, study, and sleep. Repeat. I know that might be rough after a while, but man...right about now I kind of wish I could have just one day to swim, eat, study, and sleep. No bills. No mortgage. No huge pile of laundry to sort and fold that is spilling over into the hallway. Just swim, eat, study, and sleep.

One day of that would be just about perfect. One day to take back my silly mistake from Me, Version 1992. And then I'd be more than happy to go back to Adult-Land. (Wait. Adult-Land sounds like some perv store you see the sign for off the highway in the bad side of town...um, well, you know what I mean, right?) But I realize that even though I think I'm busy, there are people out there with much more on their plate than me.

So here's to everyone out there, whether you're 16 or just young-at-heart, who are a little tired today and maybe even a little bit grumpy, because you got up to get 'er done in the cold and dark at whyamInotinbednow?-o'clock. Someone out there is wishing they could have that time you just did. Even if you think you are busy, remember someone out there at this very moment is dealing with more than you can even wrap your head around. And a good, healthy dose of endorphins is worth the smelly chlorine-y skin, the stinky running shoes tossed in the car, and the slightly damp hair on the way to work today. So turn that frown upside down.

And maybe one of these days I'll get to the pool again.

The Lap Lane

He waits at the side, with his Nana.

He stares and stares and stares.

I stop, and see his little face, quizzically watching me.

"What are you doing, Mama?"

"I'm swimming, Bug!"

He smiles. "Mommy swims."

I think of all the times I swam in this pool with him, carrying him...the only thing I could do that summer, since he was so big and my body was busy growing him. I wondered who he was, what he was like, and what he was thinking in there as I did my extremely awkward flip turns.

What are you doing, Mama?

Four years ago, I trained for an Ironman. It was, aside from labor and delivery, the biggest physical test I've ever endured. And for that I've been lucky. Unfortunately, I've seen many of my loved ones put themselves through things much harder than an Ironman lately.

I remember that journey and all it taught me. And I think about who I am now. Still an Ironman--always, an Ironman. But even more than that, too.

He watches. He isn't interested in the slide or the fountains right now. He stands, and he watches and watches.

"You need this, Mama?"

He hands me my kickboard.

"Okay, Bug...yeah, I could use that now." I smile. I hate kick sessions. I hate them because I'm not any good at them, but he wants to see me try, so I will.

After I kick a few laps, I tell my mom, "Just 20 minutes more or so," and she tries her best to pry him away from standing at the foot of my lap lane. Somewhere in that 400, she succeeded. I kept on swimming, focusing on my stroke and my breath and everything you need to when you swim.

Sometimes people ask me if I'll do another Ironman. Sometimes I ask myself. He is my Ironman right now; he is my epic journey. Someday soon, I know without a doubt that my Ironman will be a race again. But for now, I love taking him and his baby sister on this road--this ever-changing, intimidating, frustrating, exhilarating, amazing road that is called Ironman.

I get out and head over to him as he sits on my chair with my towel. He's eating a cheese sandwich and some blueberries. He sees me walk over with my kickboard, my cap, and my goggles, and his eyes light up.

"Mama!"

I run over to him and give him a big hug, feeling the high of a strong 2600 meters in the pool combined with the hug of a small little man. "Hi, Bug!"

"Mama swims. Mama swims fast."

I smile. (He doesn't need to know it's really not that fast.)

And I understand that he's still with me on every lap. Just in a much different way.

I Needed That

Here's the story--

Been having some trouble sleeping again--this happened after Bug and I have been on the lookout for it lately. This time at least I know what I'm up against, and it's not quite as surprising. Kinda like the massive hair loss postpartum that no one tells you about that HAPPENS AND FREAKS YOU OUT. Seriously. I had no idea! CLUMPS! It's MADNESS! I am still not sure how I have any hairs left in my head.

But I digress.

So last Saturday, after a week with three nights of less than 4 hours of sleep per night (more like 2-3), I tried to go on a ride with my riding buddy Laura. It was pretty hot out.

And I was AWFUL.

Just awful. We're talking embarrassingly awful. Like, I'm not sure if Laura would ever want to ride with me again kind of awful. I know I was riding on a bike that was a bit too big for me, but still. I was flat-out embarrassing and bonked like nobody's business.

I got home and cried.

How on earth would I ever be able to ride fast again? I was defeated.

After a bit of readjusting, talking to Coach Emily, some yoga and just mulling things over, I decided that I needed to really really put my money where my mouth was and start freaking focusing on the MOMENT ALREADY. Enough of worrying about WIBA, Rev3, and my BQ attempt next May. This is RIDICULOUS. The only way to get better is to get better every day, one day at a time.

So that's what I've been trying to do.

The sleep has been better (alas, the hair loss is not...just call me baldy), and I've had some great workouts this week. I feel like my swimming is starting to click a bit and I'm finding my "sea legs (er, arms)." My running is still slow but I'm able to finish strong, which is good for me mentally. And today I had an AWESOME ride. One of those rides that just reminds you that you still got game.

Coach Emily had me doing a few 10 minute pushes so I really tried to hammer these. Now, my wattage is still pretty pathetic, but I'm trying to remember that it will come, and part of that will come as the rest of the weight comes off. But for the pushes I was able to hold 22-24 mph with semi-decent (for me) wattage--and I swear it wasn't downhill! I was pretty happy with that.

I'm still feeling the extra weight I'm carrying around but only really on the hills. I am pretty confident that I should be able to drop the last pounds by Rev3. I have 18 more to go. Now, I know that sounds like a lot at 4 months postpartum. But here's the deal: when you gain 62, that's pretty good. I'm trying to remember that for whatever reason, this body freaking blows UP when I get pregnant. 44 pounds lost is 70% of that weight. So, it's similar to someone who only gains 30 having 9 pounds to go. Right?

(I like the way that sounds, at least.)

I have a post brewing in my head and if I ever get a second, I'll write it. But for now, I'm off to play on the new/old swingset we just inherited and have a date with my hubby tonight.

Feeling good, blogfriends. Feeling good. And WIBA is in less than 2 weeks...even better!

Enjoy your weekend!

I am the MASTER

The master of bringing up the rear in Lane 2, that is.

So I decided to head up to the local Masters swim for the first time in the pool. Shouldn't you swim a little first on your own, TST, so you don't get your rear end handed to you by all the fishies at masters? Why yes. Logic says that would be a good idea. However, I am cheap. And I have a free week pass to swim with the masters club, versus the eight dolla drop in fee at my old gym.

So masters it is. Who needs logic?

Now, I had a bad experience at the one time I went to masters back in '07. I showed up and met the WRONG guy. You know the type--the guy that is just so full of awesomeness and smugness that you can't possibly share the same water with him. Yeah, That Guy.

So I'm all trying to be friendly and stuff, which was a feat in and of itself, because at the time I was 10 weeks pregnant and felt like POO. So I just walked up and introduced myself to the first person I saw, which happened to be That Guy, and he kept sizing me up.

What do you swim? What are your times? What do you DO?

I told him I was a former swimmer turned triathlete and stuff. He asked what races I do, and I had just finished Ironman Wisconsin, so I told him that was my last race.

He said, with a smug little sneer on his face, "Did you finish over or under 10 hours?"

My reply was, "Well, since the winning female was 10:01, I'm PRETTY sure I finished over 10 hours."

Butt munch.

Anyway, that rubbed me the wrong way and that, combined with lovely morning-sickness heaving with every flip turn, pretty much kept me away from masters from then on.

But I decided to give it a go this past Monday. Why now, you may ask? Well, the answer is quite simple.

Hi, my name is Trisaratops and I am a pool slacker.

I am a decent swimmer who really has no reason not to turn in better swim times, except for the fact that I am a bona fide pool SLACKA. As in, when I swim by myself, I just putz around and don't really push myself very hard. And since no one can seem to figure out a way to install a 25 yard pool in the comfort of my own basement, I just don't swim enough to be very good.

(I don't ask for much, people. In my basement. That's all I really want.)

This might explain why my bike and run times dropped dramatically after I had Bug, but my pool times stayed the same or, in some cases, even got slower. BOO.

I'm happy to report that A) That Guy wasn't there, or at least stayed far away from me and B) I had a BLAST! It was hard, though. I definitely got my rear end handed to me on a platter. And I SO brought up the tail of lane 2. But you know what? It wasn't the slowest lane, I'm 9 weeks postpartum, and it was my first time in the pool. So I'm going to let it slide. And I definitely went a lot harder and longer than if I was by myself. I missed a few send offs here and there and had a foot cramp up, but still managed to hit somewhere around 2400 yards. Not too shabby!

My lane mates were super cool, too. They kept checking to make sure I was okay and told jokes on our rest breaks and stuff. And I think just having some people in my lane helped me push myself harder than I'd do on my own.

So I'm hoping to make this a weekly workout, and maybe if Bean sleeps well Friday nights I can even hit Saturday morning. In the summer, they swim outside in the wee hours of the morning, which I LOVE because everyone's asleep and no one "needs" me--hence, no mommy guilt. But for the next month or so it will require some juggling.

But I think this little relationship I have with masters is on the mend. :)

I'm a planet.

I really love the movie Juno. Just last night I was telling Matt, "remember way back when we could go see movies in the theater?" Sigh. I do like movies, but with us trying to save money for baby we have resorted to reserving whatever happens to be available at the library.

And just like that my parents called today to see if we wanted to sneak out for a matinee of Invictus.

SUPER. excited.

We're heading out in just a few, and it will be nice to see a movie in the theater that I've really wanted to see.

On the training front...what training? What is this "working out" thing? MANNNNNN. I have been SOOOOOOOOOOOO tired after work that it's all I can do to sit in a chair with Bug and play play-doh, or, if I'm feeling really crap-tastic, I lay on the couch and we watch Elmo. I know. Not the best example, right? I keep telling myself this is temporary and if the weather wasn't so cold we'd be at the park at least. Sometimes I'll take him up to the library so he can play and I can sit, but it's been a rough week. I'm hoping I can hold on here the next 4 weeks of work. I have some serious AP grading to do this weekend and plan on timing that up with Bug's nap tomorrow. Those kids don't exactly get patient with their test grades, if you know what I mean! They're basically like a room full of me's. Very type-A. Very not understanding of what 9 months pregnant with a toddler means. (Which is good. Because they are 16.) So, I'm doing my best to keep up.

Today, however, was my return to the pool, in a ridiculously inappropriately miscast Baywatch red suit. I was so afraid I'd see someone I knew at the pool, besides my awesome preggy friends JenC and Bridget of course! They came all the way to my side of town to swim again, which was really nice of them. I was a little worried about what a month-hiatus or so, plus massive extra poundage would do. My upper body was all, "HUH?!" for the first 300 yards or so, and I had a really rough time catching my breath, but other than that it felt great! We did about 1200 yards which was all fine by me. And then, we hit the Original House of Pancakes again for PANCAKES. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM PANCAKES.

I know, I know--no pics = it didn't happen. But I'm sorry. I AM SO NOT GOING THERE. There will be NO documentation of me in this suit going on 9 months pregnant.

I am happy to report I was still able to flip turn! It wasn't pretty of course, but I could do it. Boo-ya!

Okay, off to a movie for the first time in maybe 6 months or so--yahoo! On tap this week will be prenatal yoga, some dreadmill walking, and trying not to fall asleep at my desk again during lunch.

Extra protein with a side order of gills

The end of school is almost upon me, and I have about 3.7 nanoseconds to breathe and post, so I thought I'd update you on what I've been up to since kickin' it at the Cleveland Half Marathon three weeks ago!

It's midgie aka "Canadian Soldier" season here in the NEO.

They look like skeeters, but don't bite and don't live more than 24 hours. They are just here to swarm black clouds and become fishy food for Lake Erie. I hate to complain about 'em, because they are a sign of a healthy Lake Erie. However, they swarm in nasty black clouds and you can even HERE THE BUZZING in the evening of said clouds. If I hadn't lived hear Lake Erie most of my life, I'd be seriously freaked out. They're not quite as bad as this picture, but you get the point..

See, they are good for something! A-ha, Stupid Yankees. :)

So why, then, did I think it would be a good idea to do a ride on Route 2 during Midgie season?

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Bugs. TASTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Also, I decided to act like a triathlete and actually swim.

Do you know how many times I've been in the pool since IM New Orleans 70.3?

In honor of freshman final exams, I'll give you a multiple choice question:

A. ONCE.
B. FORTY-TWO THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED AND SIXTY SEVEN.
C. NINETY TWO.
D. ALL OF THE ABOVE.

Yes, friends...it is sadly ONCE. So I knew I had it coming for me when I got in the 25 meter outdoor pool on Saturday. I was literally afraid to start swimming! My mush-tastic arms didn't know what was about to hit them.

I did 2000 meters (slowly and out of breath) and it took me just over 31 minuts to swim a mile, which normally is HORRID for me, but all things considered I was okay with that. Now that I have access to a pool from 6am until 9pm, there are NO EXCUSES for me not to hit it at least 3-4 times a week. Bring back my gills, please!

So if you want a non-traditional protein shake made with midgies, just let me know. Otherwise, I need to get ready to hang on those Wisconsin Hills at WIBA--giddyup!

That is what we call BEING RESOURCEFUL.

I got all my stuff ready last night: lunch, Bug's lunch, bag for swimming, school bag, outfit, purse. I seriously look like a bag lady every time I leave for school. Was quite proud of myself--yummy healthy lunch packed, cute outfit, swimsuit, cap, goggles...I really felt like I had it all together.

For a while.

Because I quick changed at school with my cat-like reflexes, and apparently was so catlike that I LEFT MY TOWEL IN THE TEACHERS LOUNGE BATHROOM.

And I didn't realize it until I was at the gym. And had dropped Bug off at Kids' Cove.

(translation: my babysitting timer was ticking)

Crap. I'll just get in the pool and figure something out.

So I jumped in and started swimming. I felt like...well, I felt like I hadn't been in the water since New Orleans. Which is true.

What about my backup tank top? Hmmmm. I have a backup tank top in there. It's super flimsy and cheap, but maybe I could at least dry off enough to put my clothes back on?

Arg.

I finished 2500 yards and hopped out, because, time was ticking and I had to take a quick shower before I got Bug from the Kids' Cove. Pulled out my little flimsy white Target tank top and thought, this is no good. This is no good indeed.

And then it hit me.

I had a backup diaper in there.

Buried in the bottom of my bag was an unused, random Pampers diaper. I keep it in there in case we have a Level Five Poop Explosion. You know, because if I DON'T have it in there, I'm guaranteed a poop explosion.

(not me personally. you know what I mean)

I thought of a great hero to all, Vince the Sham Wow Guy.

W.W.V.D?

Vince would TOTALLY DO IT.

So I did. I dried off with a Pampers diaper. AND IT FREAKING WORKED, PEOPLE.

Dem things ABSORBANT!

So, the next time you're in a bit of a towel-less pickle, just reach for the nearest Pampers. You'll be a complete freak, but you will get (sorta) dry.

Hey swimming and cycling--YOU LISTENIN'?

What the freak show has gotten into my running lately?!

I don't know what the heck's going on. But it's in a good way. Earlier this week I did 6 miles and negative split it heeeyooooggggee-ly, and today I did the same thing on my 1:45 run. Ended up going 11.5 miles with a ginormous negative split.

Bonus!

It's seriously nuts. What feels like a nice easy pace is what used to borderline my half marathon race pace. I'm not sure what's going on. I swear I'm not on "the cream" or "the clear."

You hear that, A-Rod? I AM LEGIT.

Anyhoo.

Training is ramping up, which means I am teetering on the borderline of sanity/insanity. It also means I am EATING EVERYTHING THAT IS NOT NAILED DOWN. This week threw some crazy curveballs at me, but I'm going to be able to hit most of my workouts, which I am pretty darn proud of.

The pool is--the pool, meaning, it's not in my basement so it's harder to get to, but I'm super consistent when I'm there (pace-wise, that is). I feel like such a pool underachiever. If I could get there 4-5 times a week, I'm sure I'd see some definite time dropped off. But I just don't have that luxury. So, I'm just trying to get there as much as I can, which lately, hasn't been much. Good thing I can (relatively speaking of course) kinda wing it...I definitely can't do that on the bike or run.

Cycling is coming along. I am coming to terms with the fact that I might have to just sack up and get outside in very much less than ideal conditions here pretty soon. I mean, holy CRAP it's almost March, which means I'm almost a MONTH OUT...and I really need to get a little actual road experience, you know? So I'm really, really hoping for a nice 60-70 degree dry Saturday or Sunday in March. However, Cleveland is known to have absolutely nutty March weather, ranging from 75 and sunny to 15 and 18 inches of snow. So, the reality is, I might have to bundle up and get out there in (gulp) more like 40 degrees.

*crossing fingers*

So there you have it. A teensy part of me is thinking perhaps I should have signed up for a spring marathon with the way this running is going, and knock a few minutes off on my quest to BQ. But, there's plenty of time for that, right?

After all, in 4 years, my qualifying time goes up five more minutes.

(don't worry--there ain't no WAY I'm waiting THAT long) ;)

I'll leave you with a little conversation that was had in my doctor's office last week:

Nurse: I'll just need to take your blood pressure.

TST: OK--no problem!

Nurse: *looks at the numbers* Wow, that's really low...

TST: Yeah, I know. My old doctor used to joke with me about it...

Nurse: Well, that's a good thing! Now let me take your resting pulse.

TST: *thinking: oooo goody! this is always a fun one*

Nurse: *scrunches face* Um...wait, let me do this one more time...

pause for dramatic effect

Nurse: *makes funny face* Wow--are you aware your resting pulse is 47? Do you exercise or something?

TST: Uh, yeah. A little bit.

Yahoo for endurance sports! You make TST's ticker strong. :)

A Love Note

Dear Speedo Long-Hair Silicone Swim Cap,

I heart you.

Forgive me for gushing, but I've never met a cap like you before. I just can't explain how much I lurve you, oh cap.

I figured I was just doomed to have my cap suck the life off my head forever. Or, until I cut off my hair. And the last time I made a drastic haircut was in 1998...ten inches, cap. With some nice layers, too. You know who else had dark hair with layers that was shoulder-length and made some BAD PRESS in 1998? Let me give you a hint: it rhymes with Schmonica Ploominsky. And I was a bit overweight. And student teaching 8th graders.

Never. Again. Cap. Never again can I cut my hair short.

So I just figured I was doomed to my ears being pinched and mumbling obscenities as I fixed my cap three times in one 20 minute time trial. Or even trying to perfect the one-armed cap-fix during a race. I've gotten quite good at that, actually.

And then I met you.

Long-hair cap, you will be with me forever. I never knew I could feel this way about a cap. Now I don't have to cut off my hair OR have my brain sucked out the top of my plastic-coated head.

As far as love is concerned, you fall somewhere above delicious enchiladas, the color red, and lip gloss, and slightly behind Stadium Mustard and peanut butter.

(Trust me, cap...that's not an easy spot to earn.)

Love always,
TST

What NOT to eat before a swim

One of the things I love about Cleveland is how ethnically diverse it is. There really is every different kind of person and background in this town. Which, of course, means great food. Ethiopian, Thai, Czech, Polish, Italian, Slovak...and especially, my FAVORITE PLACE TO EAT, Aladdin's Eatery. Mmmmmmmmm. Tasty Middle Eastern cuisine.

SOOOOOOOOOOO tasteeeeeeee.

But, my friends, that is NOT the best thing to eat before you crank out 3000 yards. Unless you want it to go like this:

Stroke stroke stroke breathe
BURP FALAFFEL
stroke stroke breathe
BURP GRAPE LEAVES
stroke stroke breath
FLIP TURN BURP BABA GHANNOUSH
stroke stroke breath
BURRRRRRRPPPPPPPP ARAYISS PITA

Yeah. Pretty much my swim yesterday. Lesson learned.

(still totally worth it, though)

Big disappointment in my swimming TT from Sunday, BTW. Boooooo hiss. I did the EXACT FRICKEN THING I DID LAST YEAR. And, my STOOOOPID cap came off three times. To quote the great movie "Christmas Story," the cloud of my obscenities is still hanging over Oberlin pool. Good thing no one heard me, since everyone else was swimming. Arg! No excuses. If Michael Phelps can win a gold medal with his goggles full of water, I should have been able to get through a 20 minute TT with my cap not sucking the life out of my head.

Needless to say, I also ordered a silicone cap for "Long Hair" from swimoutlet.com. It's that or get my hair cut short, which is just not an option.

Anyway, I guess I should still be OK with my performance. It was fine. But I am just kinda tired of being sorta fine in the water. I've been swimming like crazy lately...couldn't I have at least been a 50 faster than last year?! Arg. I swear I have one speed in the water...slightly better than mediocre. We can just call me TriSaraTops the Slighty-Better-Than-Mediocre-Swimmer.

/end venting/

There, I feel better now. ;)

I'm getting pumped for New Orleans, fo' sho'! Can't believe I am just about 2 months out. So basically, this is like June for me. I usually race in August, and I've never raced hard in April before. So I'm trying to get in the mindset of June. June's pretty serious. June's time to put the hammer down.

And the hummus and tabbouli.

Um...really?

So I've been really having great workouts lately, which is awesome. But pretty strange.

Because it's DECEMBER.

As in, "OFF SEASON."

As in, shouldn't I be feeling slow and bloated and full of buckeyes and Christmas Ale right now? But I'm totally not. Bizarro!

(except for the buckeye and Christmas Ale part)

I had a great run on Sunday, followed by a swim yesterday. The plan was to do this:

400 Warm Up Choice
5X100 on 2:10
100 kick EZ
4X100 on 2:00
100 kick EZ
3X100 on 1:50
100 kick EZ
2X100 on 1:40
100 kick EZ
100 hard
200 Cool Down

Great workout, by the way, Coach Emily! It really kept me on my toes. And HOLY SMOKES AM I CONSISTENT. I was really pleasantly surprised! I mean, I've been only able to get in the pool, like, two times a week at MOST. And, I so haven't paid attention to the clock lately. So I was very excited to see that my times were (although not the fastest in the world) pretty consistent. It went something like this:

1st set of 100s: All between 1:33-1:36. I swear I heard crickets as I waited for 2:10.
2nd set of 100s: All between 1:33 and 1:35. Crickets again.
3rd set of 100s: Starting to get a little out of breath, but still...1:34, 1:36, 1:35.
4th set of 100s: 1:34, 1:35
Balls to the Wall: DEFINITELY tired here, but still managed to eek out a 1:29. I'll take it! Yahoooooooooooooooooooooo

I've been very disappointed with my swims in races lately, so this is a promising sign. Hopefully I'll be able to keep chipping away here and be able to actually hold a decent pace for New Orleans. Or maybe this is just some kind of Christmas fluke. I hope not.

This morning I worked on my cadence which needs some help while watching both the Hills and the Hills Aftershow. I know. The first step is to admit you have a problem.

And I've already got the TiVo set for The City. But I definitely am drawing the line at Bromance. Sorry, Brody.

Because if 5am is truly me time, and the Daily Show and Colbert are both done for the season, well, then, I WANT THE EQUIVILANT OF BUCKEYES THROUGH MY TELEVISION. Okay? Just a little. Moderation is key, right?

Just don't tell anyone I watch those shows, K?

Reason 578,492 Why I Love Swimming

I remember in April, 2006, when I was backpacking to the bottom of the Grand Canyon with friends, my buddy Cort said something that's just so true:

"The best thing about backpacking is you don't think about anything else besides backpacking."

There's a certain therapy in immersion.

When I'm swimming laps, there's nothing else I can really think of. When I run and cycle, my mind often wanders. I dream, I rehash a situation at work, I wonder where I'll go next. I think about a race; I think about a song. I think about what I want to have for dinner that night.

I'm always thinking.

But swimming demands focus. Breath, reach, count. Breath, reach, reach a little bit more. Pull.

The black line methodically passes below me and when I see the "T", I start my turn.

I suppose it might be this way because I've spent a good part of my life in the water. But there's a certain calmness to swimming for me; even when it's hard. Even when I'm pushing myself. The only sound I hear is my own breath bubbling beside me and the swish of the water past my ear.

It's enough to make me forget just about anything...whether it's from 20 minutes ago or 20 years ago. I always come out of the water feeling calm. Feeling ready to move on.

And I can't explain how much I needed that today.

Move Along

Okay, so I did it. It rocked. It was a blast. And now I have to move on.

I've got a half ironman to get ready for. And, hopefully, another PR to shatter.

But that is going to require some serious work. Mostly on my bike.

I've always known I was a decent swimmer--not record breaking by any stretch, but I feel pretty good in the water and can git-r-dun without too much worry. And I've been sort of forced to see myself now as a pretty decent runner. Again...emphasis on the word decent. Not fantastic, but I can pull it out and do okay. I'm not standing on any podiums, but, you know.

The bike is another story. I know it sounds silly...I try to explain to my students how the bike is the hardest for me, and inevitably someone says, "How hard can it be? It's a bike."

I know. Believe me, I know.

I think this is why I am super stoked to train with power this year. It's no secret that I don't heart HR training. Mostly because I feel like it's always held me back. I'll be getting tested at VisionQuest soon, and I am so freakin' curious of the results. Because, seriously, who holds a heart rate of ONE HUNDRED EIGHTY ONE for an hour and fifty minutes and feels fantabulous? It just doesn't make sense. Hopefully I'll get some answers. My max heart rate must be about 397 or something.

So I think power will be a good thing for me.

So when I'm looking at where I stand, proportionally, my run and swim are about at the same level. But the bike? Oh geez. Pa. Thet. Ickkkkkkkkk.

So, I've been getting back into getting up early this week. I haven't said much about it here but, for several reasons, it was really, REALLY hard for me to get up early during most of this second half of the school year. And, eventually, I decided I needed to let it go. It worked, and now things are much better. And you know what? After a morning swim yesterday and a morning spin today, I realized the following things:

• My mommy guilt for working out virtually vanishes. Because JayZ is still asleep. He doesn't even know I'm working out. So I'm not missing anything. Except his cute little snoring that I could listen to all day, but that's another issue.
• I can catch up on the Daily Show and Colbert on the trainer, or my favorite podcasts from InTransit, Tac Boy and The.Bigun, Simply Stu, and GYGO. Again, no mommy guilt. It's just me! My time!
• Holy crap does it make me SUPER DUPER PRODUCTIVE. Yesterday I even had time to hit the local coffee joint for a tasty brew before work--and still made it to work 15 minutes early.

So, I think this former sleep-in junkie turned early bird during Ironman training and then back to getting sleep whenever she can will be turning back to the dark side of morning workouts again.

Oh, and I've been working on my initiative for EvoTri, too, and I am getting some great response. As soon as I firm a few things up I'll tell you all about it!

Well, that's about all. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must move along.

Twelve Year Old Me

I've been going to this awesome triathlon swimming clinic thingy my buddy Rob is running out at Oberlin College. It's been a lot of fun, although I haven't been as regular as I would like. But, I'm getting out there and seeing some of my tri buds and getting a real tough workout in, which is good stuff.

And the best part?

It's totally working.

Somehow, on only swimming once every 2 weeks, I'm getting faster. This makes me get excited to think what I could actually do when life settles down a bit and I can get to the pool more than once every 2 weeks.

How much is it working?

So much that I've actually been pretty shocked when I've been hitting the wall for most of the sets. From 50s, to 100s, and all the way up to 1000 yards. I'm like..."huh?" And, "really?"

Okay. We'll go with it.

But last week in the pool I thought of something, as I hit the wall for another set of 50s. I hit the split I needed to, and it was pleasantly hard...I was out of breath and had to really move the arms as I saw the black line rising up the wall. Rob asked me, "How'd those go?" I should have said good. Great even.

But I replied, "....okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah, okay..." I said. "I mean, I hit it, but I just remembered what I did when I was 12 years old."

He laughed and assured me that his twelve years old times were also a wee bit faster than today. And this coming from a guy who's freakishly fast.

For some reason, I thought about this on the whole ride home. I remembered what it's like to be in a swim meet. I haven't had one of those in a long time, but I still remember this one in particular. The one where I set my PR. The 50 free. In North Olmsted, Ohio, in a sort of crappy indoor complex. Those of you who are swimmers know what I mean here as I describe the sound of a 50 yard freestyle sprint. It's the quiet sound of your arms moving in water followed by a brief interlude of absolute screaming as you turn your head for a breath.

By the looks of this one, I could tell it was going to be close. My coach was screaming and I could see my teammates yelling at the top of their lungs. You can never make out any words...you just hear this mumbled roar. So I kicked it into the highest gear I could.

And I beat her. By barely a half a stroke.

That was Twelve Year Old Me. Shortly thereafter, I stopped swimming year 'round. I made the cheerleading squad (I know...don't laugh), decided I really wanted to be a fastpitch softball pitcher, set my sights on first chair flute, and went onto high school. Eventually, boys actually talked to me. Times got slower as I wasn't able to give swimming my all, as they usually do.

And then I was done.

(For a while.)

Now, Thirty Year Old Me swims in a pool with triathlon friends and tries to bring down my times as best I can on an every-other-week-swim schedule. There are bills to pay, diapers to change, and work to be done. There's no coach screaming for me to outkick the girl next to me.

But once you hear those sounds...you sort of always hear those sounds.

And I think what I've come to realize is that I am in triathlon because of Twelve Year Old Me.

Because, whenever I come to the wall after a hard set, I can sort of see her in the lane next to me. She's already at the wall. She's even smirking a little bit.

I don't know if I'll ever catch her. But her presence helps drive me.

I don't really get too into the age-group awards thing anymore, and that's probably a result of me not having much of a chance to place in age-group anymore unless it's a short distance race with not many people in it.

But I do get into beating Twelve Year Old Me.

I just wanna wipe that smirk off her face.

She doesn't know a lot of things. She doesn't know that Thirty Year Old Me has seen a lot more than she has and done a lot more, nor does she really care for that matter. She doesn't know how Twenty Nine Year Old Me trained for an Ironman for a year while performing a delicate balancing act with my career, friends, family, and relationships. She doesn't care about all that, because she can still beat me.

I can race her knowing these things. Understanding that, although she might beat me to the wall, there's a lot more that I've gotten to see and do by being a few seconds behind her.

She has no idea what 18 Week Pregnant Me did when I ran a 5K faster than she'd be able to do.

(She hates running, you see.)

She also doesn't know that 18 Week Postpartum Me is able to run 10 miles at a pace faster than Twenty Nine Year Old Me was able to do during Ironman training.

All she cares about is that she's at the wall faster than me. So she bobs there with her swim cap and her royal blue summer swim team suit that's faded a bit, with her event written on her hand in a black sharpie. And I'll let her go, because I know that I wouldn't trade those few seconds for the world.

But the idea that I might even be able to come close to her again is pretty exciting. And the understanding that I could absolutely annihilate her in anything over a 50 freestyle is also pretty cool. But she doesn't want to race that, you see.

When she mouthed off at practice, she was always getting threatened to be doing the 200 IM or 100 fly or some other event that would have been horrible horrible horrible for her. She only wants to do what she's good at.

And Thirty Year Old Me has done a lot more, mostly way out of my comfort zone. So I'll let her have this one little victory.

(For now.)

I Can't Fight It

So, I've had this problem/issue since I was a little kid. Often I wake up in the middle of the night for some reason and then my mind RACES RACES RACES over everything I have to do and OMG, it's getting late and did I do this already? and I can't believe I have so much to do tomorrow and oh no now it's 3:37am.

So, since I was probably 8 or 9 years old, I turn my alarm clock around. I have to, or I drive myself nuts. And this has worked pretty well.

So the plan was to work out before school so that I wouldn't have to do it when I got home. BUT, JayZ usually gets up once a night, unless we are lucky and he sleeps totally through, or to about 5am. The past 2 nights it's been around 2am.

It doesn't even matter if I get up or if Matt does. I'm up. And then I start to worry.

And then I can't fall asleep for, oh, about 2 hours.

Ugh.

So I had wonderful runs Monday and Tuesday, when he slept the whole way through. But since then I haven't because I've had the most random sleep schedule ever and been totally stressing about it.

So, I've decided on a new plan of attack.

• I will run at least 2 times during the week. This will happen Mondays and Wednesdays when Matt can get home fast after his school lets out. That way I can still spend good quality time with JayZ but Matt can play with him while I run...or JayZ might even take a little catnap, which would make me feel even better. I just don't want to miss anything.
• Runs won't be more than 6 miles for now, so I will be done in less than an hour.
• On the weekend, I'll do my longer run of 8-10 miles Saturday, and then either swim or run on Sunday.
• Core work will be done almost every day that I can, since I can have JayZ on the floor with me.
• A Friday 5 mile-ish run will be added when I can, to give me 4-5 runs and 1 swim for the week.
• I'm going to not worry as much about riding for now. I should be getting some spinervals DVDs soon so when I do I'll sneak them in on the weekend...maybe on Sundays. Something's gotta go, and since my early race is a half marathon, I feel like for now I can put cycling on the back burner. I know I should work on my limiter, but I just don't have enough hours in the day for now, and Steelhead isn't until August, so that buys me a little more time.
• Next year, when I get more settled and JayZ hopefully sleeps through most nights, then I will resume early morning runs, since I do actually enjoy them.

This way, when I get up at 2 or so, I won't put so much pressure on myself to hurry up and get back to sleep for 5am's wakeup call. Plus, I will be leading a 7am review session for APUS History every week starting next week. I will get to school relatively early all days and use that time for grading/planning, since even that still gives me some extra morning time.

So that's the plan.

Whew.

Now if I can just get through today without falling asleep...