I got all my stuff ready last night: lunch, Bug's lunch, bag for swimming, school bag, outfit, purse. I seriously look like a bag lady every time I leave for school. Was quite proud of myself--yummy healthy lunch packed, cute outfit, swimsuit, cap, goggles...I really felt like I had it all together.
For a while.
Because I quick changed at school with my cat-like reflexes, and apparently was so catlike that I LEFT MY TOWEL IN THE TEACHERS LOUNGE BATHROOM.
And I didn't realize it until I was at the gym. And had dropped Bug off at Kids' Cove.
(translation: my babysitting timer was ticking)
Crap. I'll just get in the pool and figure something out.
So I jumped in and started swimming. I felt like...well, I felt like I hadn't been in the water since New Orleans. Which is true.
What about my backup tank top? Hmmmm. I have a backup tank top in there. It's super flimsy and cheap, but maybe I could at least dry off enough to put my clothes back on?
I finished 2500 yards and hopped out, because, time was ticking and I had to take a quick shower before I got Bug from the Kids' Cove. Pulled out my little flimsy white Target tank top and thought, this is no good. This is no good indeed.
And then it hit me.
I had a backup diaper in there.
Buried in the bottom of my bag was an unused, random Pampers diaper. I keep it in there in case we have a Level Five Poop Explosion. You know, because if I DON'T have it in there, I'm guaranteed a poop explosion.
(not me personally. you know what I mean)
I thought of a great hero to all, Vince the Sham Wow Guy.
Vince would TOTALLY DO IT.
So I did. I dried off with a Pampers diaper. AND IT FREAKING WORKED, PEOPLE.
Dem things ABSORBANT!
So, the next time you're in a bit of a towel-less pickle, just reach for the nearest Pampers. You'll be a complete freak, but you will get (sorta) dry.