An Off Season Tale

And I'm not even pregnant this time!

So what does one do during an off season, anyway?

Well, I don't know, really...I'm learning as I go, I guess! I can tell you that I'm down a few toenails, up a few gin and tonics at weddings, down a few loaves of pumpkin bread and, somehow, miraculously NOT up a few pounds. I'm dreaming big, relaxing, and going to the pumpkin patch. I'm excitedly plotting my next move while still giddy from the moves of April to last Sunday.

So here's some evidence:

My 2 good buddies got married--one in WV, and one in Cleveland...lots of fun!

And little Bug loves the Pumpkin Patch!

Actual triathlon-y stuff to come later...for now, off to chill with my boys!

Race Report: Columbus Marathon, 2008

When the big races come, I've come to realize (and I also realize this is not conventional) that I do best when I step back from the hype a bit. Earlier this season I was questioned a bit in my rationale of pre-race strategies, but you know what? It just works for me. So we go with it--giddyup!

For example, at Ironman, I did not attend the pre-race pasta dinner--I ate dinner with good friends instead. I stayed in a hotel a ways away from downtown. And I tried my best not to hang out in the expo.

This weekend, I didn't even GO to the expo. I had no desire whatsoever. You've seen one, you've seen them all, right? In fact, as mentioned below, I hadn't even really thought about the race until Thursday evening, but not for the best of reasons or circumstances. But it's in these moments, of quiet and calmness, when I do my best thinking. And that's when I go over things in my head, and picture how the race will go. And every time I pictured the finish line I saw a 3. Every time. I can't explain it, except that there was no doubt in my mind I was going to do it.

So, my awesome buddy Cerveza picked up my packet and stuff for me. We were staying with her and her hubby since they were doing the half, which worked out really well. Matt, Bug and I loaded into the car and headed down to arrive mid-afternoon. Cerveza is kind of Betty Crocker and made enough pasta to feed a third world country, as usual. Which was good, because I knew we'd eat well that night for sure! My teammate Sweet and his wife Cara--my mommy/teacher/triathlete/runner partner-in-crime-- got to come over and share dinner with us, too. I am pretty sure Cerveza put rocket fuel in her pasta sauce with the way that all 4 of us ran the next day.

So we went to bed and I'm pretty sure I slept no more than 3 hours. Bug was so confused and didn't know where the heck he was, and FREAKED OUT pretty much all night. Around 3:40am, we gave up and just let him snuggle in bed with us. Then, after I closed my eyes for what felt like 30 seconds, the alarm was going off.

Your token "It's 5:27am and we're sleepy" shot

I got up, had some coffee and peanut butter toast on wheat, and got ready to go. The weather was PERFECT for me at least. A good solid layer of frost was on the car--bonus! Me likey cold. We drove downtown and I hit the port-o-potties (twice!) and before I knew it there was 2 minutes to the start.

Except I was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy in the back. Uh oh.

How do I find Pacer Catherine? aggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhpoop.

I started HAULING with 2 other dudes on the sidewalk, trying to get to the front. "Excuse us! Excuse us!" I kept saying as I blew by people and accidentally knocked into them. Then I hopped the fence. Whew! I made it.

Um, except for one thing. Now I was in the 6:00/mile pace group.

Yeah. Not in this lifetime.

I looked around and wiggled my way back a bit and finally found Catherine and her balloons with 30 seconds to spare. WHEW!

Okay. Focus time.

The gun went off, and we made our way to the front. My game plan was to stay with Catherine at least until 20, and then see what happened from there.

Can I just say this is a fantastic course, by the way? I think I underestimated the nice-ness of Columbus. It really was very scenic and had awesome crowd support. Definitely a great place to go for a mid-sized marathon. There are a few "hills" though, or really more false flats. It's not completely flat like a lot of people say, but I liked the slight change in grade and I think it was good to use different muscles for a bit.

Anyway, back to the story.

So the first 7 miles felt so slow I wanted to pull out a magazine. Which is good, I guess. I did have to make a port-o-potty stop around mile 4 for what I'll just say is a leftover pregnancy related issue that I ain't gonna go into here. It was all good, though. I caught back up to Catherine in no time. We chatted about Ironman and stuff, and she was such an awesome pacer--telling us stories, jokes, and giving us encouragement the whole way.

I saw Sweet at mile 7 and again at around mile 14! It was so awesome to have him out there and I hoped that Cara's race was going well, too. I knew she was trying to Boston Qualify and I knew we definitely lucked out with the weather. But anything can happen out there, you know? So I just hoped for her.

We hit the halfway point at 1:59:45. Right. On. Target. I still felt so slow I wanted to get a crossword puzzle or something, which was a good sign. I took a gel at mile 7 and again around 13, and had some water or Gatorade Endurance at most aid stations.

Around mile 15 I started to get into that area where you're getting tired but still have double-digits to go. I tried to just focus on Catherine's balloons, the crowd, and my steps. It was not quite as easy anymore, but each mile ticked by and I felt really, really good. I took another gel around mile 18 and drank some more.

Mile 20 came. I was both relieved and nervous, too. This, I thought, is when people blow up. This is when stuff goes wrong.

But so far, nothing.

So far, feelin' freaking fantastic, actually...which in and of itself was a little nerve-wracking. When, I thought, is the other running shoe going to drop?

It just never did.

Big ups to that guy around mile 21 with a big vat of vaseline--he even ran with me a little bit so I could get my grubby hands in there and smear it on my back and arm where my jersey was rubbing a bit. Thanks, random Vaseline Man! And, um, that's kind of nasty that I stuck my hand in some guy's vaseline jar. But hey, anything goes at mile 21.

At mile 22, Catherine told me if I was feeling good, I should leave her. I was feeling really, really good. So I did. Not very far, and I could still hear her a little bit behind me, cheering everyone on. But it gave me even more of a boost to think, "Holy crap. I just passed the pacer. And I feel awesome."

I took one more gel, and around that time I knew I was going to do it. It was just a matter of by how much, which is what happened in Cincinnati. But this time really meant a lot to me. There are things I don't talk about here, because I don't think the world-at-large needs to know, but it's safe to say I really didn't have any business doing this race. I wasn't sure I'd get through the training, and I questioned myself while doing my long runs. I thought about demoting to the half. And of course, now, I'm glad I didn't, but I knew going into this that this one would mean a lot. This one really would show me what I'm made of. This one took more than any other one just to get to the starting line.

I started to feel myself getting a little emotional. Gotta keep the emotions in check, I thought. Just like in Ironman. It's not over yet.

After mile 23, I rounded a corner to see a guy with a guitar providing entertainment (which the course had a TON of, too--another plus). He was acoustic and singing,

Whoa, sweet child of mine...
Whoaaaa sweet love of mine...

Whooooaaa sweet child of mine, mmmmm yeah....


And then, suddenly, all I could think about was Jackson.

I got a FEVAH. And the only prescription is MORE COWBELL, MOMMY.

I teared up.

I missed him so much, that morning and all those mornings I had to do my long runs. And he doesn't know the difference, but I do...and I just really felt like I wanted to make him proud and do this. I needed to do this for him, to show him someday how you can do what you think is impossible, that whatever your heart is set on is reachable no matter how many obstacles are in your way. No matter how many question you or your methods. That just over a year ago I got in "trouble" for walking 2 miles and was 50 plus pounds heavier wondering if I'd ever really compete again, and because my drive is so internal and focused this year I've blown every personal record out of the ballpark.

I've been rewired.

And someday I want to tell him that Mommy did it, but that I did it with him--that most of my runs were at 5am on a treadmill so I didn't miss a second with him, and that on my long runs Daddy and him would meet me and run the last 4 with me.

At first glance, it looks like I did this alone. But that's not true, because we did this together--all three of us. And I want him to know that someday.

So I held that in, until we got to mile 26. Because that's when I saw them. I saw them, and I knew Catherine was still behind me.

And I was going to do it, alright.

The last 300 yards or so are down a slight hill, and I don't remember anything except that I started crying with about 100 yards to go. I sped up as fast as I could and crossed the line to see 3:58.58 on my watch. A 20 minute PR; a new personal best.

A nice volunteer took my chip, and I told her "I'm sorry--I'm just happy" as I laughed with big stupid tears. The overwhelming amazement of this whole past year just caught up with me, I think. That doesn't just happen to me at finish lines. I'm usually the one who's laughing and high-fiving.

And then I found Bug and Matt, and Cerveza and her hubby Dave, and Cara. All four of us had near-perfect days. Dave PRd by 10 minutes in the half; Cerveza by 4. Cara is going to Boston.

And I saw a 3.

Me and Cara, the Boston Girl!

And then as I kissed Bug with big tears on my cheeks saying, "We did it, Buddy! We did it," he grabbed my banana. Cuz that's how he rolls.

Oh, sure, he looks cute but you'd better WATCH YOUR BANANAS.

So as I look back now, I'm even more happy with the results and dreaming bigger. I negative split a marathon.

Negative split. A MARATHON.


Who does that? Somehow I did, and I still can't believe it. Seriously--disbelief. Mile 24 was 8:53, for cryin' out loud. It means I had a combination of excellent training from awesome Coach Emily, a perfect day, I ran a smart race, and some good mental boosts from Coach Kara who has really become more like Friend Kara, and support from my team , friends, and family.

My awesome teammate, Sweet, fresh off a 9:58 in Kona last weekend!

So that's the end, really. I'll outline my training in another post, as well as my nutrition, more just so I can have a record of what I did because it freakin' worked for me BIG TIME.

And I've got quite big plans for the future, too. But for now, if you'll excuse me, it's time for a little off season. Because I haven't stopped moving since my 6 week checkup with my doctor last November, and I've got a lot to do over the next few weeks. I'll be going on lots of walks, leisurely rides, heading to the pumpkin patch, watching some football, and drinking some cider. WITH a little bit of Captain, of course. ;)

But be forewarned...I'm going full speed ahead when the season starts again. And I've got BIG plans. Because I've really redefined what my upper limits are, and I'm still not near them yet.

Not even close.

3:58

I'm sitting here typing in bed, because, quite frankly, I am POOPED and it's comfy. So there. I wanted to type up my race report now, while it's all fresh in my mind, but see this need (and I mean NEED) to inhale a nice juicy burger nownownownowNOW took over. So it will come. I promise. With some good pictures, too.

But for now, I need to sleep, especially considering I got (maybe) a grand total of 3 hours of sleep last night.

But you know what?

I did it.

And the really odd thing is that I just kind of knew I would. I told Matt that on Thursday. We were folding laundry that had taken over our room and putting it away, and I just stopped and looked at him and said, "You know what? I just think I'm going to do it."

So then I did. And I'm pretty excited.

We got an absolutely PERFECT day. Some would say cold, but for me the furnace, I was LOVIN' it.

And it's safe to say that some things I thought were simply impossible just really aren't anymore. I think I've finally gotten that through my thick skull. I don't even think I really believed it until now--even after Ironman.

2002 5:14
2005 4:18
2008 3:58

And of course, that leads me to the next question: can I take off 18 more?

Because that's something I just never, ever thought would be possible for me. But I feel like it is. Not tomorrow, or anything. Probably not next year. But in my five-year plan.

This season has been, in a word, unbelievable. From the news that I was going to join this wonderful group of people in April, through PR after PR all year. I am, quite simply, in disbelief.

And I just have a feeling that it's only going to get better from here.

Laying it all out there

It's quiet now, and Bug's asleep.

It's been quite a challenging week, and an emotional one at that. I haven't really even had time to think about the race, and maybe that's a good thing. There's been no obsessing, no freaking out, and I forgot to mention it to most of my students. A few of them remembered from a week or two ago when I let it slip, but other than that, my day ended quietly in an empty classroom like it usually does. Tomorrow it will just be me in my room for a scheduled work day, which I love. Time to actually plan, make some calls, look up interesting lessons, and do all the other things I never get to do in a jam-packed school day.

So it's Thursday night, and I have about 2 more days until the big day. I've never felt more ready, but the events of this past weekend have definitely taken my mind off the race. I think it's time maybe I started thinking about it.

Hmmmm.

So I have done 2 "stand alone marathons." One, in 2002. Trained alone, 30 pounds heavier than I am now, and just happy to finish. Finishing time 5:14.

Then, me and my partner in crime, Canada Jenn, did the Flying Pig in 2005. Trained with Second Sole and my awesome buddies there. Actually had a clue. Lost the poundage. Ran a 4:18.

This race, I'm setting the goal at 3:59.59. Things went so well during training, that I thought about lowering the bar even more. But I don't want to get too ahead of myself...18 minutes is a lot to chop off, and a BQ is still too far away, so I think sub-4 is a good goal for right now.

The plan is to run with Pacer Catherine of the Clif Bar Pace Team (who just so happens to be an IMW Veteran as of this year) for the first half. Then, pick it up just slightly if I can, or stay to her like glue if I cannot.

So that's the plan.

Weather looks good so far, but this is me we're talking about and I get rained on in pretty much every race I do, so I'd better not speak too soon. I do not do well in heat, and I think I'm out of the woods for that at least.

The events of the past week have been sort of a punch in the face of perspective, so I really am rather calm and collected at the moment. In the scheme of things, really....this is just a race. I'm going to do my best, do what I know I can, and enjoy the day and the finish with my buddies and Matt and the Bug.

So, there you have it. Not the usual intense pre-race situmatation that I usually find myself in. But, regardless, I just kind of have a good feeling about this. And I just kind of feel like I'm going to do it.

So that's what I'm going to do. For those who want to play along, I'm number 4025, and you can probably track me somehow here.

See you on the other side of the finish line.

And in a week from today

...it will all be done.

Whatever the results may be.

And that's kind of exciting. Scary, but exciting, too.

It's been one of those whirlwind weekends. Something awful happened Friday. Something that is really your worst fear come true...something that makes you stop and realize how little you have in your control when you kiss your loved ones goodbye in the morning. Something that makes you stop and think that sometimes you almost don't have time for that kiss. And how you'd just never be able to live with yourself if Friday was that day for you.

I spent part of Friday evening in a place no one wants to be in--the Emergency Room, with a few other friends and quite a few tears. I spent Friday night thinking, what would I do if it was just me alone in this bed? Would I be able to handle that?

Somehow we have to, sometimes.

So this week, my race has been pushed to the back burner. And, the more I think about it, I remember that I do best when I push it back there. I am, first and foremost, a mother, wife, sister, daughter, and friend. I'm no professional athlete. I get to race in Columbus next Sunday morning and have that moment--where I have to wait in line for the port-o-potty, hands shaking, yawning like I always do when I'm nervous--because I am lucky enough to have that moment.

That morning.

After Friday, I woke up and drove to West Virginia with Matt and friends from my childhood-- most of whom I am lucky enough to still call my friends today. And I focused on the happy thoughts, because I had to--that one of my bestest guy friends since kindergarten found such an awesome girl. I danced with a ridiculous hot pink feather boa around my neck. I kicked my shoes off because they made my feet hurt, and danced to Baby Got Back like I was pretty much in the video. I did the best I could to live that evening like the gift that it was.

There is suffering and joy in all of our lives. I'm very blessed that most of mine is pure, sheer joy.

And with that, I look forward to the finish line next Sunday morning.

Fall, Taper, and other assorted thoughts

Had a great run on Friday--13 miles with a good negative split. Then we celebrated Bug's birthday Saturday with family and friends, and Sunday I had a nice recovery ride. Even had to pull out my new 2XU arm and leg warmers. Love it! Fall is pretty much my favorite season.

I'm pretty excited because one of my good running buddies is crossing over to the tri-side! So excited for her. I'm always pumped to get a new training buddy!

Now I'm in taper, which is nice, as I'm getting a chance to breathe. But, you know how it goes...taper time creates phantom pains and the feeling of being, essentially, a fat bloated cow. Although, the Friendly's Reese's Cup Sundae I took care of (well, I had about 3/4 of it. close enough) might have something to do with it. Today, I just had one workout. And it felt pretty weird! I've been "on" for a while now, and now that I'm slowing down and gearing up for the big day, it feels a little strange.

I've never been more ready for a race. But the marathon is a funny animal, and you never quite know with unwavering certainty what you're going to get. All you can do, is what you can, with the day that is given to you.

And trust yourself.

And that's what I plan on doing.

One Year Later

...and I love them more every day.

Happy Birthday, Little Bug!

Two weeks until Columbus...and I'm gonna make this one count. Big time. :)

Honestly

This week was quite a challenge. I was ready for a big-volume week with over 40 miles of running, a bike and a swim.

And then I got bronchitis. Ugh.

I've been trying to wrestle with some pretty serious stuff the past 3 weeks, and I think it's starting to affect me physically. I rarely get sick, so when I do, I usually take it as a sign that something is out of whack. The body has a funny way of letting you know things you just don't want to admit, you know?

I ran 10 on the treadmill earlier this week, with a few pushes. Not too much trouble, as I'm on antibiotics and have an inhaler to help clear things up.

Today, I had a 20 miler. My longest run before Columbus.

Alone.

I didn't have time to plan anything ahead of time, as a lot of people around here were running Akron today. Plus, Bug was up from about 2-4 last night...probably teething...good times, good times. So we all slept until 9. I woke up, looked at the clock and said to Matt, "Hmmm. I was supposed to be nearing the end of my 20 miler right about now."

Ah, yes. I am learning I need to roll with the punches here. And lately, there just seem to be an awful lot of punches.

So 20 miles gives you plenty of time to sort things out. I don't know if I have any concrete answers yet, but I'm working on it. And I felt all emotions on this run...invincibility, fear, pain, uncertainty, elation. Pretty much the whole gamut. Which, I have to say, is paralleling my life at the moment, too.

I wondered when I would get my work done.

I wondered what Bug was doing.

I thought about how I had no business at all doing a marathon in October of this year, and how this is probably the most insane thing I've tried to do in quite some time.

I thought about stopping.

I thought I might not make it.

I thought I wouldn't be able to negative split this thing.

I thought how long 20 miles is, and how lonely I felt.

I thought about how I just don't know what to do.

But I remembered a friend told me that even when we're training alone, we're not really alone. There are other friends out there, training with us. I heard an AT&T van honk at me, and saw my triathlon buddy JBird in it, waving to me. And just like that, I was reminded.

I thought about why I was out there, running 20 miles, when I could be at home with my husband and son. What is this all about? What does this mean? Honestly?

It will mean quite a bit on October 19th. I really thought about it, and I came to the conclusion that this might mean more than Ironman for me. There's less hoopla and time to write about epic stuff, for sure. But this just might mean more to me. Because this has happened on a delicate tightrope act.

I went to Miami University for my undergrad. Since I worked pretty hard in high school and my parents saved up, I didn't have to take out a loan. This meant that I didn't have to work during the school year; my job was to be a student. And I took that seriously, mind you. I got pretty stressed out over classes and finals and grade point averages and all that junk. I ended up graduating cum laude, thinking that those were the 4 hardest years I'd worked at that so-called "public Ivy" school.

But they weren't. Not even close.

The four hardest years I worked where earning my master's degree at Cleveland State--a good school but not as rigorous of an selection process as Miami, for sure. I took classes at night, after teaching all day. Three or four nights a week I drove downtown and sat in classrooms from 6 to 8:50 or so, and then spent my weekends grading my own students papers and then flipping the switch to become a student and write papers. Sometimes I fell asleep with student papers on my lap and my HIS 697 book on the nightstand, open to page 389, highlighter still uncapped. I was still very lucky, as I was on full scholarship, so money was not an added stress. But I worked my butt off those four years.

It put everything I did at Miami to shame. Miami felt like a walk in the park.

And I am proud of both my degrees, but there was a different feeling when I walked at CSU to get my diploma...I felt almost more ownership of that one. I had to really work magic for that, and it was one of the proudest moments of my life so far. I had tears in my eyes when they called my name in the CSU convocation center. At Miami, I was just beaming from ear to ear, and the only tears were when I drove away from my friends a few days later.

Columbus will be my CSU.

It's not my first marathon, first Ironman, or my first endurance event...those moments and finish lines have already happened. And they were wonderful.

But this one?

This one, I have really, really had to work for. This one has shaken me to my core more than any other event I can think of. That includes Ironman. Honestly.

There will be no Mike Reilly, no people in crazy outfits cheering me up any hill...no "M" dots anywhere, no Boston Qualifying time or anything like that. No hoopla at all.

Just me. Me, and my arbitrary goal of trying to get to the finish line while there's still a "3" in the hour's place.

I thought about that, and how much this journey has shown me about myself. How I still don't really know what to do about things, but one thing's for sure--one thing's in my control: I am going to finish this run. And I am going to negative split it.

And with that, my last 4 miles went 9:13, 9:03, 9:01, and 8:52.

Honestly.

Changes

I'm knee deep in the process of making some big changes. It's all good...much in the sense that Ironman forced me to simplify and clarify, I'm doing some of that now.

It does mean my writing here has been a bit sporatic, but the writing in my journal is filling up lots of pages. :) I'll keep it real here, training-wise, as often as I can!

Speaking of which, just about a month until Cbus, which I will be rocking a sub-4. Yep, I said it. I'm feeling really good. Did a 16 mile run with the last 8 supposed to be at race pace three weeks ago--and held 8:55 for the last 8, feeling pretty darn awesome. Last week, had an 18 miler in the pouring rain, and finished strong. Yesterday, ran 10 on my own, then the last 4 with Bug and Matt. I was supposed to go race pace the last 3...and I went 8:40s, which just felt about perfect.

(race pace goal is 9:09)

Part of me says shoot for more like a 3:55, but I'm thinking I'm going to stick with 4. Really no point in changing now, as BQ is 3:40 and I'd have work to do for that...so I'm going to stick with The Awesome Ironman Pacer Girl that I know for the 4 hour pace group and just see how it goes.

I'm gonna enjoy it, and hopefully carry Bug with me across the finish line.

That's all for now!

Silhouette Shadows

In the house I grew up in, there used to be these two silhouette cutout pictures of my brother and I in a frame. I don't even know if they're still up there, actually. Just my face, but a paper shadow...you can't really see my expression, but you can see my features.

I remember the first race I ever did...the Cincinnati Race for the Cure, back in 1998. I remember how it was a sunny day, and I was wearing the cotton race tee shirt because I didn't know any better. I remember going there with a group of friends, and wondering if I could really do the whole 3.1 miles. I remember in the middle of the race, looking down, and seeing all the shadows of people around me, bouncing, running, each for a different reason, and each a different shape.

Training for Ironman, I found my silhouette again. Expressionless, strong, and constantly one step ahead of me. I trained and trained and hoped someday I'd catch her.

Today, I ran.

In the bright sunny fall day, past middle school football teams and an elderly couple walking. And my shadow caught my eye again. Still a swishing ponytail; still expressionless and strong. Still one step ahead of me. But this time, there's another shadow.

A stroller, with a little man inside. I heard him giggling, saying "mammamabababadadada" which always brings a smile to my face.

So I took a little mental picture her--my shadow--wondering where she'll go next, if the ponytail will still swish, if that little man will be riding a tricycle next to her. Knowing, all the while, that the expressionless outline will still have strength, will still have grace, will still have hopes and dreams and will still be one step ahead, daring me to catch her.

I Heart Fall

First and foremost....major props and vibes going out to all my buddies doing IMW today! I can't believe this is my two-year Ironaversary. Wow, how time has flown...anyway, I am having so much fun tracking my buddies....GOOOOOOO guys go! You can bet I'll be glued to my computer screen tonight!

Okay, so I am feeling a bit swamped lately, but I have to say how much I love fall. It's a new start in a lot of ways--a new school year, I'm doing a new training season for a new race, and it's full of changes. This is good, but at times I feel a little overwhelmed. But my body's doing it's best to keep me going and surprising me, and the little Bug is filling up every second of free time and energy with so much joy, that I'm trying not to feel too overwhelmed with the other stuff.

There's a definite crispness to the air, and despite the hot humid stuff we had last week, at night it would cool off nicely so that you could open the windows and get the breeze. It's starting to be the kind of nights to put on a sweatshirt and make a fire--not just for fun but because you really need it to keep warm!--and watch football! And can I just say that my little Miami University Redhawks hung in pretty good against Michigan yesterday? Although, as my hubby reminded me, Michigan is definitely in a rebuilding year...BUT THE SCORE WAS GOOD SO THAT'S ALL I CARE ABOUT.

AND--Matt's alma mater, Ohio University, was beating the #3 ranked OSU Buckeyes UNTIL the 4th quarter?!?!?!?! It was super fun to watch that game! We went to a benefit for my former softball coach and Matt's former football coach, Bob Sielski. It was a lot of fun, and a special way to honor his memory. He passed away ten years ago of pancreatic cancer, and I can't believe ten years have gone by. He was an amazing person, and if anyone's interested in learning more about him or donating to the cause, you can do so here.

On the training front--had an AWESOME 16 mile run yesterday. Coach Emily said to do the first half easy, and the last half at marathon pace, so I did. Matt and the Bug joined me for the last 4 miles, which was such a nice boost! :) I'm proud to say I did the last 8 miles at just under a 9 minute pace, and felt fantabulous the whole time! I feel great today, too, which is also a good sign.

Lots of stuff going on this week, so I'll see how much I can get away with again...one day at a time, right?

GO Brownies!

Morning Runs

I don't talk about this very much, but around this time of year it bothers me. So I will today.

I like running in the morning, but not alone. And not outside.

Which is kind of sad, because I hate running inside. I hate that I've been on my treadmill the past 2 weeks, when it's perfectly nice outside. I hate that I've been riding on my trainer, with a fan pointed on me, when it's a gorgeous morning outside. Sometimes I'll let it slip, that I've been in my basement already, when it's just September, and people ask me why. And I say because I don't want to risk a flat at o'dark thirty and be late for work. Which, is kind of true.

But that's not the real reason.

When I'm alone, anywhere, but especially in the morning for some reason, it bothers me more. I don't feel safe. Which is often silly, as I live in a very safe neighborhood. Nothing ever happens here, right? Except that's what everyone said before it happened.

A jogger found her. In the morning. Someone jogging, alone, found her. I know, it's silly...it wasn't completely a random thing. I shouldn't be worried 20 years later. She was targeted, he had contacted her before, she was only 10 and she fell for the oldest line in the book, blah, blah, blah. But for some reason, around this time of year, I remember it again, and it bothers me.

I just remember that day, the day the principal came in to tell us they found her, because her brother was in my grade--what we all sort of knew but didn't want to hear--and that it was a jogger. In the morning.

My close friends will tell you I'm skiddish alone, and in the dark. I drove a few of my friends and housemates nuts in college, constantly nagging them to lock the doors, lock the doors, all the time hearing "but nothing ever happens here...."

It's just very sad, because, well, we're going on twenty years here. And a small part of me feels like I have almost twenty years of fear that I wouldn't have had otherwise. And, of course, anger. Because she would have turned 30 later this year.

Anger that he's still out there, as far as we know.

So, unless someone wants to join me, I'll be in the basement a lot here for a while. I'll miss some great sunrises, and maybe someday I will be able to be a jogger in the morning.

But not right now.

There's something especially fun...

...about chicking a dude running while I'm pushing a baby stroller.

;)

One Week In

I just lost my class for a meeting, so I'm sitting and just taking a breather.

Whew.

Figured I might as well throw a post up to state that I made it...one week down, one good solid week of workouts in for the next race, and so far, so good!

I'm not used to standing, talking a lot, or wearing anything other than flip flops, so me poor widdwle toes are quite blistered. And I have not much of a voice left. But it's been pretty fun, nonetheless.

And it's not 90 degrees, nor am I nine months pregnant and scared out of my wits, so that's always good.

Most of my workouts were done early, or while pushing Bug in his stroller. Let me tell you how NOT fun it is to push a 24 pound Bug in a stroller while trying to do 5K pace pickups. He sure liked it, though! I've got about 9 hours planned for this week, and, barring any major disasters, I should hit that. That, in and of itself, is quite a victory for me.

Tomorrow morning I'm super excited to be able to hit the trails and run with another person that can talk to me! Yahoooooooooo! It's not just me and my Garmin! :) I'll be doing 12 miles with Aimee, my buddy and my Iron-Bro Eric's wife, who is training for the Nike Women's Marathon the same day of C-bus. We're about the same pace and have the same goals, and want to start REALLY early, so it works out perfectly! Then later that day I'll take Bug out for a few more miles to get about 14-15 in. Sunday I've got a ride and some weights, and Monday my last swim outside for a while. I really wish the pools were open in September around here, because it's still CRAZY hot here in September! Oh well.

I've been focusing on good nutrition, and it seems to have paid off! I'm pretty pumped about that. Now, I still eat my ice cream, don't you worry....but I just try to do as much whole grains, fruits and veggies, low-fat dairy and lean meat as I can, and--drum roll please--I've lost 4 more pounds, which puts me below my pre-pregnancy weight! Yahoooooooooooooyippeeeee! So now I'm all about maintaining and toning up what I've got, which is (to me) a good place to be.

Tonight, though, it's all about celebrating...a new year, a good start, and cashing in on a gift card from my brother for my FAVORITE restaurant, which happens to be a Mexican place. I sure hope I don't pay for that tomorrow morning... ;)

Oh, and the little Bug started walking on August 17th. I forgot to mention that. And it's been sooooooooo fun. I like to think he did it so that I could be there for it. Thanks, Bug!

So, yeah, I did this race and stuff.

No, really!

Remember I said I couldn't end this tri season on a du?

We've got these great little local races around here put on by NCN. Small, cheap, and local. Can't beat 'em. So I decided I'd trade in my race voucher from volunteering last year when I was all pregnant and huge and do the international distance today. Signed up online last week, packed my bag yesterday before my friend's wedding, and was all ready to go.

Until.

I spent the better part of last night and this morning, um, clearing out my system, so to speak. What?!?! I didn't eat anything that I normally don't eat, so it's still a mystery to me. Perhaps it was a little bug or something. It was no fun. So I decided at about 3am this morning that I could either A) bag the race, which totally stinks, and end my season on a du or B) downsize to the sprint, because, hey, then I'm not too far away if I crash and burn, right? It has been hot, hazy, and humid as HADES here lately and I knew that trying an oly in this weather with the amount of bathroom time I was seeing was a recipe for disaster.

So I got to the race and dropped down a level to the sprint. I'm REALLY glad I did that. I'm fairly certain that the oly would have meant lots of port-o-potty time. Mmmmmmmm. Port-0-potties in August.

;)

So, I also got to thinking, that holy crap, I haven't raced a sprint distance tri since 2005. I sorta think they are too hard, which is kind of how I feel about 5Ks. Because you have to go all fast and stuff, you know? I like to zone out at one speed. Plus, there is no room for error. But I thought, what the heck? I might as well step outside the comfort zone and try something different. So I knew this would be an interesting day.

Saw a ton of my CTC buddies there which was awesome! It made it so much easier to face my tummy. I hit the bathroom not one, but two more times before the start. DEAR SWEET ALMIGHTY THERE CANNOT BE ANYTHING LEFT IN MY GUT, I thought. Turns out I must have been right. Whew! Good timing.

So the gun went off, and I'm not even sure how far this was supposed to be but I think it was a 1/4 mile swim, so we're looking at roughly 400 meters. I forgot what a beach start is like, and it showed. I tried some dolphin dives and got nowhere. I arrived at the first buoy in a complete bottleneck. Poop sandwich. I then was swimming next to someone doing breastroke. I was like, "Okay, no. I'm not staying here." So I tried to turn on the jets, but it didn't seem to work too well. Total time including the run up the hill to T1 was a (for me) VERY disappointing 9:43 (I think). Looking at the results it seemed that the times for most people were pretty slow, so I'm thinking it had to be more than 400 meters. Let's hope, at least!

T1 was uneventful. Got on my bike and took off.

And then realized something was rotten in the state of Denmark.

Why, oh why, was I pushing 300 watts and going 15 miles an hour?!?!?!?!!?? I knew there was a little headwind, but I rode along the lake all summer so I'm used to it and NEVER saw anything like that.

Oh no. I know what happened.

The $%$&%(@ tire is rubbing against the rim. Damn horizontal dropouts that are so tempermental. Arg. I had this problem earlier this week but thought I solved it.

There comes a moment when you realize you should have thought about this earlier, and curse your stupidity. Then, you have a few thoughts go in your head:

"It's not that bad...I can just ride it this way."

But when I couldn't go more than 13 mph up a TINY hill, I knew I needed to stop.

"Damn. There goes your race."

"You know, self, sprints are too fast to make this up."

And then a few other things went through my head that I will refrain from typing, so to keep things PG around here.

Stop #1. Tried to fix it. Got on. Didn't fix it.

Sigh.

Stop #2. Tried again. Watched people whiz by me again. Got on. Still didn't fix it.

#%#$$*@.

Stop #3 This is it, I thought. We don't fix it this time, we're just a' gonna ride it as is and call it a training day.

I fixed it! Hoooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy!

Whizzed by quite a few people at this point like they were standing still. :) But as in a 5K, you screw up a little, and there just isn't much time to make it up. I figured at least I might be able to have a decent run.

Got into T2 and still managed about a 19.3 average, despite three stops. I'll take that.
And since I still, yes STILL do not have Yankz on my shoes, spent about 47 minutes TYING MY SHOES LIKE A FOOL IN T2. Note to self: if you are going to do short course stuff, please act like a short course athlete and do a little preparation. Oh well. I was just happy my stomach was still okay, but I was afraid to have anything but water.

Took off on the run and passed a few people instantly. Then got passed by a tiny little thing in my age group who I flew by towards the end of my ride. I remember thinking, "Hmmm, she looks like a runner. Wish I had a few more minutes on her." Oh well. Turns out she was a runner, and she took OFF. She eventually won my age group. Competitive Sara curses having to stop 3 times on the bike because I might have had a shot with a few more minutes on her. Arg!

Got passed by another girl in my age group and let her go, as it was early and I wanted to hopefully pick it up. But it was hot, and I felt a little weak. I saw her about a half mile later, stretching on the side of the road. My goal became to hold her off, and I did. She eventually finished a little bit behind me for 3rd in age group.

Somehow I managed to eek out a 25 minute 5K...hey, not bad! I finished the whole shebang in 1:22 and change. Good enough for 2nd in my age group! I'll take that fo' SHO'!

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO proud of my girl JenC...that chick flew by me on the bike and had a solid bike (as usual) and then pretty much PR'd her 5K to win her age group! Jen, I tried to catch ya but you were smokin'! GREAT JOB! It was so good to see her do so well, and pretty much everyone in CTC finished strong or even took home some hardware.

So, you know what? Short course stuff is pretty fun. I'm very very glad I did the sprint and not the oly today. I think I could get used to it!

And I guess that's pretty much a wrap on my tri season this year!

What a freakin' blast. :)

Now, onto my marathon goals. Time to up the runs big time. I'm feeling good and I know I've got some speed in me, but do I have 26.2 miles of enough speed? That is the million dollar question.

I also head back tomorrow, so it will be a challenge to fit this in with the first few weeks of school. Here goes!

Reality Check

Okay.

Deep breath.

This is a call to remind yourself that you do this because you love it. You have been doing this ten years and that's just about a third of your life. It is as much a part of you as blinking your eyes and breathing. It is what you were born to do. You truly enjoy it, and that's more than a lot of people get to say about where they spend most of their waking hours.

In those ten years, you've tried your best to teach the history of this world and of this nation to about 1,300 students. Some got it. Some didn't. Some don't want to admit they got it, which is a tiny victory. You entered a barely-22 year old who thought she could change the world and was heartbroken to find that wasn't entirely possible. You almost left.

You know now at 31 that you can't change everything, but you can change some. And knowing that has brought a certain amount of peace to some of the heartbreaking things you've seen.

You went to more school at night, on a full scholarship that you worked so hard for, and you earned your M.A. in history over three years of writing papers late at night after going to class after teaching classes. You graduated with honors, without a penny of debt, and it meant just as much as the four years of undergraduate work you did where you also graduated with honors and, thanks to a lot of scholarships and a lot of help from Mom and Dad, graduated debt-free.

You've worked so hard to get where you are. And, as far as jobs go, you have the perfect one. There is not another place you'd rather be, save perhaps the Capitol as a United States Congresswoman.

You are going to have your 27th first day of school on Tuesday because you want to.

You don't have to.

You do this because it's who you are and it's what you worked so hard to become. It makes you a better mommy. Some mommies are happier when they are at home, too, like your own was, and that's perfect. Every one, every time, and every situation is different.

You have this choice.

You just enjoyed two and a half months of time with him and your husband, too, with paychecks still coming in every week. Sure, you could make a lot more doing something else, but you would never, ever, find something with such a good schedule.

Many mommies do not have this choice. They work because if they do not, there is no food and the electricity is turned off.

So, for crying out loud, relax. He's fine. He gets to play and sleep with a few of his friends, and chase them around. He even gave you his first steps this week, just so that you got to see them. You still can go feed the ducks, head to an Indians game, go for a ride, take him for a jog, catch lightening bugs in the backyard, and at least for next week go for a swim. You won't stay as late as you used to in your classroom, and that's okay. The house won't always be clean, and that's okay, too. Sometimes you're not going to be able to cook a nice meal, and that's okay. Lean Cuisines are your friend. Dust bunnies can be your friend.

All of this is your choice, and that in and of itself is such a wonderful privilege.

So go have your first day of school. And stop freaking out about it.

He still loves you and his Daddy more than anything in the world, and you wouldn't trade one choice you've ever made for anything.

I sho' am SMART

How to:

--kick your own arse

--look like a total tool

--make your neighbors think you are nuts

So I got this interesting workout from Coach Emily. She said it was supposed to be "fun." It was! But I looked pretty silly.

Tuesday's workout went like this: the plan was to ride at an easy pace to warm up for 20 minutes, and then run for 10. Then, I was to hammer at about 170-180 watts on a "course" for 10 minutes and run hard for 5. Then I'd do that all over again. Finally, I'd cool down easy on the bike for 20 minutes. Now, the only way I could really think to do this avoiding stop lights and traffic was to do a loop around my block. It's a bigger block and has two sidestreets so I could at least alternate. My own little velodrome, I guess.

So I got all decked out in my IMW outfit and took off. I've been feeling really strong on the bike lately, but it's been a while since I dropped the hammer on the run. My 20 minute warmup was done before I knew it, and then I ran at just under 9s for my run warmup. I stood in my driveway and thought, "Okay...here goes."

ZOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM! I took off. It was pretty fun! I don't usually ride this hard so I was enjoying it. I had to slow a bit to take the corners but I figured this would be some good handling practice for me. I was eyeing my PowerTap and seeing numbers in the 200s and high 100s, so I knew I was pushing enough. It was really tough, and I started to see a few of the same people several times. I wondered if they noticed me as I flew by their house for the 5th or 6th time.

Then it was time for run number one. I tried to just go at a controlled-fast pace and negative split it. I ran on the same little "course" I made and got a strange look from a little old lady weeding her garden. Finished that little run with a pace of 7:42.

Um...okay. Now I have to do it again.

I know it's dumb, because no one was even noticing me except the little old lady--and only because I made eye contact and saw her quizzical look. But I just felt kinda silly zooming around the block 80 times, you know?

Did it again, and felt really good! For run #2, I was tired as hell, but determined to make it faster. I negative split that one, too, and finished with a pace of 7:28. Now for a lot of people out there that's a nice little stroll but for me that's about my 5K pace, so I was pretty pumped. Did my cooldown, and relaxed the rest of the day.

Fast forward to the Wednesday. I've been feeling really rotten about my eating the week after Steelhead, so I've tried to tone it down and eat better this week. The day after this tough workout, I had egg beaters and soy protein boca sausage for breakfast, and then a grilled chicken salad for lunch.

Then I took Bug for a 5o minute fartlek run in a moderately humid and warm day.

Notice something?

NO. CARBOHYDRATES. AT. ALL.

What was I thinking?

Have you ever BONKED on a 5 mile run? Cuz I have. It was crazy!

I don't think I've really ever hit the wall--even during marathons--but I felt weak and shaking within the first 15 minutes. "What the heck is going on?!!?" I thought. Then, I really thought about it.

DOH.

I'm in trouble.

I was laboring to hold a ridiculously slow pace. I did have a water bottle with me, but nothing else. Bug sat quietly in his stroller. I tried my first pickup.

Nothing.

I. had. nothinginthetank.

So I decided to scrap the fartlek part of this run, and just sludge through. Ugh. With about 2 miles to go, I stole some of Bug's Cheerios--CHEERIOS!--and chased them with some water. That's how desperate I was. I almost called Matt, but I decided I could get home on my own. Got to my house in a little under 48 minutes, but that's run time only. I didn't factor in the times I had to stop to steal my son's FREAKING CHEERIOS.

Oops.

So, the moral of the story is, the day after you kick your own butt, HAVE SOME CARBS before you do it again. I know, I know. You can just call me CAPTAIN OBVIOUS.

Or she who hits the wall on a five mile run.

Or she who rides around the same block 87 times.

:)

The things we do, huh?

Shifting Gears

Whew. Lots going on this week. I'd better run down in listy-like fashion:

• ate more ice cream than any human being should be allowed


• had two great swims, one nice ride, and a two hour hike with the Bug and Matt to celebrate our 4th anniversary on August 7 :)


• decided for my other "30 minute ride" to "spin out my legs" on Tuesday that it was TOTALLY ACCEPTABLE to ride 13 minutes to the nearest Dairy Queen with Bug in tow and Matt on another bike, eat a Thin Mint Blizzard, and then ride 13 minutes home.


• I SAID IT'S TOTALLY ACCEPTABLE SO BACK OFF


• Speaking of which, I'm still trying to figure out...how long is the window to eat ice cream without abandon after a 70.3? One day? Two?


• Probably not six.


• Tried out some new recipes this week and actually had time to read a magazine


• realizing that chasing Bug around ONE ROOM is quite tiresome
• I'm pretty sure my 100 IM is the most HILARIOUS thing around. I might sell popcorn and charge admission next time Coach Emily prescribes it. It ain't pretty

I've also made some peace with the duathlon thing. I was really upset about it for a good 24 hours or so. I think it's just because I feel like I worked so hard all summer and I really was ready to blow this race up. But I have to remember that I did blow it up, just not in my element. Shaving almost 40 minutes off the bike and 23 minutes off the run is nothing to sneeze at, so I'm feeling pretty good. I'm kind of feeling like nothing can stop me right now.

Which is probably not good.

See, I've got this little thing called a marathon coming up. And I haven't been in the marathon mindset for a long time...like, since the Flying Pig back in '05. So I really need to shift a bit and get it in gear. Coach Emily has already informed me of what my training weeks will look like, so I'm ready to give it a go.

Sub-4 ain't gonna be automatic, kids. I need to focus. And put down the ice cream.

I've already had one good solid freak out about going back to work...not because I don't want to, because I love what I do. But I have some real issues with leaving the Bug, because, in my head, HE CANNOT SURVIVE TEN MINUTES WITHOUT ME. It's the same reason why I don't have a good swim when he's AT the pool with my Mom or Matt. Because, the whole time, I'm thinking, "Is he okay? Does he need me? Maybe I should get out."

Seriously. The WHOLE time.

I guess this is sort of just what happens when you have a little Bug, no? You just have to learn how to squelch the irrational thoughts, and realize that YES HE CAN SURVIVE FIVE SECONDS WITHOUT YOU. And a few hours. And eventually college, even.

Yikes.

So, I am going to try and shift mindset a bit. Hopefully the transition will not be as hard on me as it was in January. I am not going to get into details, but I will just say this: I didn't deal well with it. And it took a good 2-3 months of getting used to.

So in the meantime, I'm going to get up earlier, and either do schoolwork or get a workout in...but still have time for the Zoo and the Nature Center and the pool in the afternoon, followed by a walk with Mugsy Pug and maybe a sunset at the beach. And I'll do one more triathlon, because who ends their triathlon season with a du? Seriously.

Because you know what? I might only have two weeks left of summer, but they will be my two weeks.

A Race Report

The day before, in the nice calm lake...Wil, Pharmie, Me, and Rural Girl

That is:

1. "A" race report, which now I feel a little stiffed on, because my "A" race was turned into a du

2. Why you should step on a dead fish after you find out your swim is cancelled

3. How much fun I had with friends

4. Holy smokes, pregnancy doping strikes again

Well, I'll give the report here. I don't have any pictures, because why would I take pictures when Steve and James are there? Seriously. So I'll post a few of theirs. Those guys rock! All photo credits to them. Thanks, guys!!

Drove Friday morning to Benton Harbor, Michigan, and pulled into the HoJo parking lot to see a big EvoTri banner and my teammates, Stu and Michelle on the deck! That was good to see. A few minutes later, Pharmie and Steve arrived. It was so good to see everyone again!

Let's just say that, um, the HoJo, is NOT the place you want to stay. Ew. Ewewewewewewew to the max. Like, toenail clippings on the floor nasty. And I'm not kidding. But staying with my buddies made me pretty much forget that!

We met up with the rest of my teammates and a few buddies from CTC at the pre-race pasta dinner. It felt really strange to leave my bike in transition and walk away. I felt kinda naked. But it was sort of nice to NOT have to worry about that the morning of the race.

Enjoying some pre-race food with my girls

Now that's what I call a big transition

Rural Girl's alarm clock went off at 4am, and she got out of bed all rarin' to go. Me...it takes me a few minutes. ;) She brewed some coffee so that helped.

Why yes, I AM aware how HAWT we all are at 4:52 am. Me, Stu, and Rural Girl

Then we packed up, met Stu, Pharmie and Steve, and headed to the race site.

Immediately, Steve warned us the chop was bad. I wasn't too worried about it, because, A) what was I going to do about it? and B) swimming in Lake Erie can get pretty choppy, so I'm used to some chop. I always feel comfortable in the swim, and sort of knew today wasn't about proving my swim anyway, but seeing how far I've come on the bike and run.

So we headed out to the start, walked almost the full mile there, when we heard the swim was cancelled.

I'm pretty much adding up all those yards I swam in the pool in my head

Poop sandwich.

I was really disappointed. I mean, damn. That meant I just spent $220.00 on a glorified brick workout. This was my A race. I trained really hard for it. Boo fricken hoo. And I was grumpy.

Then I stepped on a dead nasty Steelhead with fish guts spilling out.

And I freaked out and ran into the water.

So I took that as a slap in the face from the race. Like, get over it, chick. Do your thing anyway. So, I did.

We all suck it up and accept the new du.

We walked pretty far to get to the start of the uber-lame 2 mile run. (Hey, I was still allowed to be a teensy bit grouchy ;) I decided I'd just use it as a warmup. I knew this was a Clearwater qualifier, so there would be some hard core chicks hauling it. But you know what? It's a long day, and I didn't need to max out myself in the first 2 miles.

Yes, I'm smiling but inside I'm quite grumpy.

Garmin had it at 2.3 for 18:05, race says 18:09 for 2.1 miles. Whatever. Who cares.

You'd be smiling, too, if you got to high five this guy!

So then the real race started in my book. What can I do for 56 miles? Watts were to be held around 150-160, and Coach Emily told me to go rock it, so I did.

Rocked.

It.

It was soooooooooooooooooooooo fun. That is a seriously fast course. A bit of headwinds in the beginning but nothing really too troublesome. And, they were at your back the way back, which is always good! It had some nice little rollers, and I just felt like I really got in a great rhythm and felt AWESOME. Nutrition was good, weather was perfect, and I could hardly believe the mile markers when I got to them. The kind of ride I hoped to have all year, you know? The one that made it worth it to leave my little guy for those rides. I was very, very happy.

Except for one thing.

I have NEVER SEEN SO MANY PEOPLE DRAFTING IN MY LIFE. I mean, we're talking packs of 6-8 DUDES WITH DISC WHEELS all flying by riding TOGETHER like it was a Saturday group ride. Passing people TOGETHER for as far as I could watch them ride away. I know they are probably figuring it's better to risk a 4 minute penalty and get to Clearwater than do it the right way, but you know what? DUDES, THAT IS SHADY. Karma will get you sometime.

/end rant/

Got back to T2, and pretty much did a jig in transition. I was estatic. I almost welled up with tears like a big loser, and I'm not even kidding. It just felt good to know I made that time away from The Bug and Matt count. I know that some of that was the bike I was on, and I'd be curious to see what I'd do on my Trek. I know it wouldn't be the same. But you know what? I think some of that was me, too. I really believe that--I literally worked my ass off this winter, spring, and summer, and I'm very proud of what I did yesterday.

By all accounts, this was a little short. My PowerTap said 54.5 but I had trouble starting it so I thought maybe it was my fault. However, after talking to Pharmie and a few others, most people said it was between 54-55. Another reason I feel a little stiffed, but...a huuuuuuuuuggeeeee PR nonetheless.

My goal on the ride was to break 3 hours. I rode 2:44.34. If we adjust that and say it was 54 miles, I still averaged 19.7 mph. By my calculations, at that pace I would have come in at 2:50.

And that is what I like to call progress.

Seriously, back to T2. I'm just so darn excited. :) I was excited in T2, too. So excited that I left ALL MY SALT TABS IN MY BENTO BOX.

DOH!!!!!!!!!

Bad move. It was getting pretty hot, and it was very sunny. I did remember to apply sunscreen SPF 45 for the third time that day, so that was good. I realized I left the salt tabs in the bento box pretty much when I stepped out of transition. I then decided to roll the dice, drink more gatorade than usual, and see what happened.

Goal on the run was to come in just under 2. Like, 1:59 would have been cool. But I have to remember I've never even broken 2:25 in a half marathon at the end of a half ironman. However, I know how well the running's been going lately so I felt pretty confident I could do it.

The first loop was rough. Around mile 4 I was still averaging about 9:10 but feeling the effects of no salt tabs. Took every sponge and cup of ice I could get my hands on at each aid station, and the volunteers were WONDERFUL. The course surprised me with a few hills, including one that made me say a few bad words under my breath and walk part of it. I didn't expect that. My new teammate who is super tall and ran by my on his loop two LIKE HE WAS WALKING, PoohBear, absolutely rocked the course! It was nice to meet him--holy tall lean ball of talent that guy is!!! :)

Still feeling pretty good on loop one!

I was still feeling OK when I saw James and Steve (and Steve was wearing his amazingly awesomely bad outfit, which just cracked me up) but I knew missing my salt tabs was going to catch up to me. I just hoped it wouldn't catch up to me before I hit 13.1.

Look! I have a leg muscle! And an arm muscle, too! Or is that a mirage....?

Started loop two and started to succumb to fatigue. However, I was passing dudes left and right. There were a lot of guys walking on loop two. I was still running, but it was definitely slower. I felt my legs starting to cramp up.

Please, please, legs... Just wait...come on...keep going and you can cramp all you want after the finish line. I promise.

I started counting steps. I started singing songs in my head. I cursed that stupid hill again. And then, I was at mile 12. I knew I wouldn't break 2, but I still knew I was going to be close to 2. And that was good.

Smiling for the camera...just a few more miles!

At the very last stretch, we had to run on sand. I said, laughing to the spectators as I tried not to fall over, "Are you KIDDING ME?!?!?!!?" They laughed, too. It must have been funny to see everyone running like they didn't drink their V8. But I saw the finish line and I did get a little teary, but hopefully no one saw because I AM NO PANSY, AIIIGGGGHT?

Note to RD: THANKS for the sand dunes at the finish line. :)

Total run 2:03.18 (9:24/mile)

Finish time 5:10.39

I wanted to break 6, but what I called my "super secret goal" shared only with those who know me very well was to go under 5:45. By adding my worst 1.2 mile swim ever to this bike, run, and transition time, and adding another 5 minutes onto the bike so it was 56 miles at my pace, I would have finished in 5:41. Which is comfortably enough under my goal that I feel like I sort of did it. (Even though sort of is just sort of....sigh.)

So, when all was said and done, I kind of PR'd my half distance by just under an hour...if we're thinking somewhere around 5:41. I'm no 5:10, that's for sure, so I feel like I can't use that as my half PR. I'll have to wait until New Orleans to see what my "real" PR is. ;)

I am so happy and excited for what I did do, though. I don't want to downplay that. I just feel like I have to add a few asterisks, which is a bummer. But I know, regardless, that this was a big breakthrough for me. My swim is fine, I'm a lot more capable on the bike than I thought I could be, and my run is okay. My next goal will be to knock some time off my run and try to improve on the bike even more. Training less with more intensity has DEFINITELY worked for me.

After the race, I cheered as loud as I could at the finish line for my buddies. And then snarfed down food like nobody's business.

Buddies at the finish line!

But I really, really wanted to get home and see my little man. So I didn't get to stay long enough to see my amazing rockstar teammate ACCEPT A POSITION TO CLEARWATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I called her and screamed a little in her ear in excitement. :) Congrats, Rural Girl! We are all so proud of you!

Got home, and wished my little man a happy 10 month old birthday. Saw him, remembered what I did 1o months ago that night, thought more about what I did in the race and how far this body has taken me, and then cried.

Okay. So maybe I am a little bit of a pansy.

I'm home!

And tired.

But at the same time buzzed up on caffeine so I could make the drive home.

Got to kiss my little man, who turns 10 months old today, and now I'm going to sleep in my own bed.

Lots to tell, but here's the short version: we all just did a $220 brick workout. I was grumpy and grouchy when I found out the swim was cancelled, because it's my FAVORITE part. I guess I understand why, but I was still pretty bummed out. I'm no duathlete for a reason. But I think I might have a new favorite part....

The bottom line is, despite the snafus and this NOT being a triathlon, I had a ton of fun. It was great to hang with my team and my tri club buddies. And I absolutely shattered my goal on the bike, and pretty much nailed it on the run.

My "time" with a two-mile run substituted for the swim was 5:10. Which means even if I had swam the worst time I've ever swum for a 70.3 distance I would have finished in 5:36. But "would have" doesn't mean much. That and 89 cents will get me a cup of coffee. Oh well....

So I'm going to try not to focus on how this didn't feel like it "counted" as much, and focus on the good stuff:

Previous two 70.3 bike split averages: 16.5 and 15.7

Today: 20.4 mph

Previous two 70.3 half marathons: 2:30-somethin' (I don't know and I can't find it anywhere, but it was in that general vicinity), and 2:25

Today: 2:03 (9:24/mile)

And the best stuff of all was having my buddies there! I wish we had another few days to play around.

More to come, but for now, I'm sleepy. :)