Seriously. Please tell my head it's NOVEMBER.

Why can't I stop thinking about tris?

What has gotten into me?

Here are a few theories:

1. I am working my butt off. Working through most lunches while grading, grading late at night, finding some sweet new lessons for my APs and trying to really integrate my new iPads I got through my grant for World. This is good, but makes me really tired.

2. My kids have a level of energy that would make a squirrel on about 19 shots of espresso look slow.

3. I miss throwing my energy into races. I enjoy where I'm putting my energy now, but I do miss a good, hard, last mile at the end of a tri where I'm chasing someone or some goal. I heart that, and I haven't really had it since August (save the 5K where I accidentally broke my 9 year old PR for literally no rational reason).

So, I emailed Ana to see if I could talk her into something crazy--doing Rev3 Cedar Point with me next year. And you know her response?

"Oh my goodness...this would take some TJ (husband) convincing. Are you sure I won't drown?"

To which I thought, SHE DIDN'T SAY NO! VICTORY IS MINE!

Now here's the problem. Since early September I've been acting pretty much like a duathlete. Which a duathlete, I am not, people. I am a triathlete through and through. So I MUST get back in the pool. But how?

Sigh.

I have to make this work somehow. Some ideas I'm tossing around:

1. Picking one morning a week to go before school but I'd have to go straight to school. This requires a good deal of coordination on my end (bags, breakfast, lunch, clothes, etc.) and would not be fun for Matt since he'd have to get both kids out of the house solo by 7:00am which he's really good at but still it's kind of a headache. Four hands from 6:45am-7:00am are really almost a necessity.

2. Pick one day after school and go directly from school, hopping in the water sometime around 3:40, so I can be home by dinner. Pros--relatively convenient for Matt and I . Cons--I just hate spending more time away from the kids after school, even if it is one measly hour.

3. Go at night, after Bean is in bed and while Bug is getting put to bed. Judging by the schedule, this would need to be probably Monday or Wednesday. Pros: no missing time with Bug or Bean and easiest on Matt. Cons: OMG, do you understand how HARD it is to get motivated to head OUT to swim at 8pm? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I've been running, riding, and lifting mostly at night or in the wee hours of the morning lately. Realistically, I think Option 3 is probably my best bet. But man, that's gonna be hard. I'm going to need someone to hold me accountable. DO YOU HEAR ME, INTERWEBS?

I'm going to keep doing some thinking, crunching, and pool-scheduling research, but my goal is to get back in the water in December. I need to put the tri back in this athlete.

A Funny Thing About That...

So I'm sitting here, after enjoying a fully warmer-than-usual weekend with the family. Last week was insanity at work and I had a million things going on at the exact same time, so on the weekends I try to go on full-on hibernation mode and just chill. Of course, chilling involved a 7 mile run with Bean (in a jogging stroller that was pulling to the right the entire time--hello, right core muscles this morning! Owie!) and a solid spin session and weights today. But I fit it in between chocolate chip pancakes, Phineas and Ferb, and a few hours at the Zoo.

Weekends like this with sunshine and warm temperatures make me think of races. And how I miss them. So here are my very very very preliminary plans for 2012:

January 15th: Run for Regis Trail Half Marathon. I am so crazy excited for this--talked Ana into it and we may not be able to prepare much on trails, but it will be super fun anyway!

St. Malachi 5 Mile: It's kinda a rite of spring for Cleveland runners. You just have to be there.

Chattanooga Team Evotri Training Camp: Words cannot express the sheer awesomeness this will be. I am so so so pumped to hang with my teammates and do nothing but swim, bike, and run (okay, and maybe eat and sleep some too) for a long weekend!

Cleveland Half Marathon: Oh yeah, baby. It's on. I plan on puking at the end. In a good way.

A few assorted local tris, including Huntington and Lorain: TBD

And the one I'm toying with....Rev3 Cedar Point. No additions will be put onto my house next year, which means things won't be nearly as nutso as they were this summer. I still won't have enough time to train the way I used to, but who does have enough time to train exactly the way they want to, right? If I do this, I want to do it well and PR. This would mean under 5:44 (and in my head I'm already saying as close to 5:30 as I can get), which I am confident I could do, provided I have the blessing of my family (namely Matt). So I'm still mulling it over and probably will for the next few months.

So that's the tentative deal. I do need to get back to the pool soon, though. I'm still working out those details, since unfortunately, the last time I checked there was no 50 meter pool in my basement. The nerve.

The last thing I wanted to note of record is that several people have told me lately that I look like I've lost weight. Like, more in the past month than I've had in a long time. Which is interesting, because it was just about 2 months ago I decided I was done weighing myself. Like, probably forever.

I was one of those people who weighed myself every day, because I thought it would keep me on track. Which it did, for a while. But then it got to the point that it would dictate my day. Half a pound up because I had some pretzels the day before? I AM A FAILURE. Day ruined. I started to realize that this was quite silly. I know, I know. It only took me 34 years.

I decided I wouldn't be a slave to that stupid thing anymore. I know myself to know well enough that I wasn't going to get huge and bloated and let myself go a la Val Kilmer (I mean, seriously. Have you seen that guy lately? Where is my volleyball scene from Top Gun Val Kilmer? Sigh.) I planned on eating as well as I could and trying to be better about weights (like, 2 times a week, and no excuses--at least some pushups, chinups, lunges and core for crying out loud). So that's what I did.

I have no idea what I weigh. I am pretty sure it is about the same as usual. But I don't care.

I must be doing something right, so I'm gonna keep doing it. And I really don't want to know what the number is. It's not worth risking how good I am feeling. What if it's up? And then, DAY RUINED. I'm finally just kind of done with that.

For now, ignorance is bliss!

Big news--HUGE news, actually--coming very very soon from Team Evotri, too! I can't wait to share! But I have to. Trust me, though...2012 will be an awesome year.

The Responsible Thing to Do

I am usually very responsible.

Really, I am.

Already, I've spent about four and a half hours grading my DBQs for APUSH. Little by little, dent by dent, red pen mark by red pen mark, I'm getting through them.

To grade each one correctly requires a good deal of attention.

And focus.

And patience.

And lots and lots of writing: theirs, and mine, too.

But today, we got an extra hour. Which I could easily have spent grading...again. It probably would have been the responsible thing to do during naptime, after we played at the park and went up and down the slides all morning, even though I did a good 2 hours this morning.

But, you see, today is November 6th.

And it's Northeastern Ohio.

And during naptime? It was 64 degrees, light winds, and not a cloud in the sky.

Which means, of course, that trainer ride I had on the schedule? Yeah, that's now being replaced by a ride outside.

Getting ready to hop on my Quintana Roo CD.01

*click, click...zooooommmmm*

A mid-ride snap

The great thing about rides outside in the sun in November in Northeastern Ohio is that it feels like such a gift, which really, every ride should feel like. I know that soon it will be gray here...gray sky, gray slushy snow, gray clouds. Soon enough, for sure.

A tiny example of the colors I saw...this was where I turned around

But today? Today was full of color.

Blue sky. Bright green grass. Bright blue lake. And the leaves were falling fast, but were still beautiful.

There was nothing gray about my ride today. Today was full of crayola leaves, of red and pink and orange and burnt sienna and goldenrod. And soon enough, I'll be running in the gray, bundled up with icicles on my eyelashes, but today was a huge inhale of color that I'll remember to carry me through the gray. And know that even if it is gray, it's still a gift.

Standing in my driveway after my ride, looking up

The Best Chilly Morning Breakfast EVER

I don't know about you, but when October hits, I become OBSESSED with pumpkins.

Pumpkin spice lattes?

YES PLEASE.

Pumpkin bread, pumpkin muffins, pumpkin pancakes?

GET IN MAH BELLY!

The trouble with this is that all of the above are really pretty loaded with sugar. And that plus the fact that it's easy to just throw on the yoga pants and oversized sweatshirt (it's cold, right?) makes it oh-so-tempting to succumb to the waistline-wrecking ball that is pumpkin flavored pastry or caffeinated goodness.

But stay strong, brothers and sisters!

I have found something that is just as tasty and is not nearly as full of sugar as all my favorite pumpkin goodies. AND, it's awesome after an early morning (or late evening if your schedule is as crazy as mine!) crisp fall tempo run.

(Disclaimer: I rarely bake, because I hate measuring things. But I love to cook, because food is art. You just keep throwing things together until you get what works best for you. That's my kind of recipe! So I do a little-of-this-and-a-little-of-that, but for the sake of a recipe here I've given my best estimates at measurements. Just try it out until you find the right pinch of everything for you!)

Pumpkin Cranberry Oatmeal

You will need:

1/2 C Quaker Oats

1 C water or skim milk

a pinch of salt, if you so desire

1/4 C or so of canned pumpkin (you can always add more!)

a healthy spoonful of brown sugar (more or less depending on your taste...and how concerned you are about sugar! I usually do about 1 TBSP or so)

a few pinches of pumpkin pie spice (maybe 1/2 teaspoon?)

a handful of sweetened dried cranberries (or any dried fruit, really!)

optional: add some chopped pecans or walnuts to really make it a hearty meal and add some healthy fats!

It's really easy, and takes just a few minutes! Simply prepare the oatmeal, using water or milk (and salt if you desire) in the microwave according to the directions. Then, add a glob of pumpkin puree, a spoon of brown sugar, the pumpkin pie spice, and your cranberries. Mix it all up, and enjoy your healthy pumpkin creation.

Now you can save your extra calories for something even better!

REESE'S PEANUT BUTTER PUMPKINS.

Enjoy, and happy fall running!

What?

No really.

WHAT?

Are you serious?

Yesterday, I am pretty sure I just beat my previous 5K PR by a second or two.

This is insane on many levels.

1) I am pretty much the least in 5K shape of my life. Or so I thought.

2) I am running MAYBE 15 miles a week.

3) I am not very good at 5Ks anyway.

This time that I set back in 2002 (I think--it's been so long I can't even remember!) which I believe was somewhere around 23:48 or so (again--so long I gave up really trying since I don't do these much anymore) and haven't been able to beat ever since....

I just busted it out yesterday.

According to my watch, 23:47. We'll see what the final times were (UPDATE--They have me at 23:46! Yippeeeeee): this wasn't a chip race, and I was back a bit (now I'm regretting that! DOH!).

To top it off, I even snuck into 3rd in my age group--which means you know it was a small 5K field! Ha ha!

Anyway, I should back up. So this race was literally in my front yard. It didn't run through it but came close, so the Mom and I signed up. Mom had to head out of town due to a last minute family emergency (it hasn't been the greatest 2 weeks in TST land, unfortunately) so it was just me, myself and I. My plan was twofold:

1. Run as hard as I possibly can.

2. Try not to hurl.

I had absolutely NO expectations about this race. I even told my buddy Shannon how NOT in 5K shape I was. I lined up kind of near the front but still pretty much in the middle of the pack. If I could average just under 8--like 7:59 or so--I'd call it a victory, given my lack of mileage. The good thing is that although I don't have many miles, Coach Emily has been giving me some good intensity and I've been doing some hard fartlek stuff. But I had a HORRIBLE run on Monday night. Awful awful awful. I could barely hold low-8s for my TWO MINUTE PUSHES. Ugh. So I really didn't expect much.

The first mile I was going hard, but comfortably hard. I kept looking at the Garmin in a bit of disbelief because it didn't feel that fast. Made it to the first mile marker in 7:23.

The second mile, things got a bit harder and I was laboring more, but the wheels weren't coming off as I expected them to. I tried to follow a few people in front of me who had a good pace and just zone out on them. The second mile was around 7:43 or so. Slower for sure, but given my lack of miles, I knew that would probably happen.

But I still felt pretty good.

It was about here that I realized that if I could hold it together, I might PR. I felt good, and it was hard but not too terribly hard.

Was this really going to happen today? TODAY? Nine years of trying to do this and I don't give a crap and it happens NOW?!

Around 2.5, I was regretting my decision to have coffee. That works really well in my short races for me, but started to make me froth at the mouth and feel nauseas. I let out a fabulous, classy, loogie-spit to the right and put on my big girl panties. It was here that I looked at my watch and knew it would be close. I was slowing down and it was starting to hurt, but I didn't want to get that far and blow up in the last half mile!

Mile 3 was 7:57. Uh oh. Time to turn on the gas!

My last .1 was an average pace of 6:36, which means I had entirely too much gas left in the tank. And when I crossed the line, it said 23:47. And I about freaking laughed, except I was doubled over and wheezing from my lovely allergy-induced asthma. So I just smiled instead.

23:47. And I would say this was the LEAST prepared I'd ever been for a 5K, or really any race.

WOW.

Okay, so what did I do differently than I haven't done in the past? How did I actually pull this off?

1. Hats off to Coach Emily for working with my insane schedule and giving me just the right amount of intensity. I definitely respond much better to low-volume, high-intensity training. This further solidifies that. My best marathon time came on my lowest mileage, and now this?! Geez.

2. I had ZERO expectations. NONE. Therefore, my head was not my worst enemy as it usually is. I just ran as hard as I could, period, the end. No drama. No ridiculous obsessing. No nerves, even. Just run hard, try not to puke, run harder, done.

3. I have been more consistent with strength training. I worked really hard to get my core back after Bean and it's still a work in progress of course, but it's a big focus. I've also worked on large muscles like glutes, hammies, and quads, and kept up with my upper-body stuff. Maybe that helped me not die? I dunno.

Now, what did I learn?

1. This is clearly not even CLOSE to what I am capable of. If I were to have some decent mileage along with intensity, I should be able to do much better than this. Of course now, I'm wondering.

2. This 5K PR bar was set very low.

Me, Anne, and Laura after the race

Okay, so I'm thinking there's really no reason I can't drop down into the low-23s and maybe even get into the high 22s. Yes, that's a dare. You hear me, head? THAT'S A REASONABLE DARE. If I can pull this out of my bum, then I should be able to do better. There's no reason why I can't.

Shannon snapped this one of me getting my medal!

So, I have two more 5Ks on the books that I was doing "just for fun" between now and January 1st. And they will still be for fun. But they might just be a little dare to myself, too. TST, the 5K underachiever, is going to try and drop that bar a bit lower where I know it should be.

Giddyup!

Are you there, blog? It's me, TST.

I do believe that's the longest I've gone without a post since turning this thing on in November, 2005.

So on that note, hi!

So school is in full-swing and that means I am, too. Lots going on, not much time to talk about it. Just a quick post to say I'm alive and well, and enjoying this fall weather. Stepping back a bit the past month or so to just work out for the sake of working out...for health, to burn off some steam, and to relax a bit. There is nothing that I am training for at the moment, and it's pretty awesome. I have a few things on my radar, but overall, I am back to the land of the solo workouts squeezed in whenever I can. I've decided the early morning isn't working out so well for me for a multitude of reasons, and switched to late at night and mid-afternoon on the weekends during Bean's nap. So far, it's been a nice switch and I'm enjoying it.

My workouts are lonely. But right now? Lonely is nice. I'm surrounded by people all day and talk ALL DAY and it's nice to be alone, with silence, just for a bit. Me and my bike. The sound of my feet on the sidewalk. The sound of me not swimming at all.

(Well, actually, that last one blows. But I'm working on getting some pool time going soon.)

Days are so busy I barely have time for lunch, because I just won't bring much home. I am really trying to leave work at work, which, of course, in our culture is growing increasingly difficult. So I work my booty off pretty much straight from 7:15am until 4, and then it's time for pushing Bug on the swing, saying new words with Bean (her new fave? "down!"), loving my crock pot in a mildly obsessive manner, and chasing around a newly-minted 4 year old and a tiny little girl who is almost 20 months old and cracks me UP.

I'll be back, I promise. But I'm in survival mode. Survival-solo mode, but it's all good.

Enjoy the fall weather, wherever you may be!

Calm Before the Storm

I wanted to ride today.

It's been a long week, and I just wanted to sneak out for a bit before the fun but tiring whirlwind day started. So I checked the radar just to be sure I could fit it in before the storms that pretty much cancelled the Michigan game yesterday hit us. I thought I'd be okay, but I just wanted to be sure.

Ugh.

It said I had a small window of opportunity, but I'd need to be back by 9am. That wasn't really what I wanted to see. It was already 7:42. I pondered. I himmed. I hawwed.

I got out and quickly pumped up the tires and put my cell phone in a baggie and told Matt, "I may be calling you from the side of the road, k? bye" and as I stood in the driveway, I heard the rolls of thunder.

Crap.

Do I go?

A guy walking his dog looked at me like I was nuts and I told him, "I'm thinking about heading out...what do you think?" He told me he saw the radar so I might be able to do "maybe six quick miles." (I was thinking maybe more like 25 quick miles, but I kept my mouth shut.) So I told him I was just going to do it, and I rolled out.

I headed west, because, you know, when a storm's coming in from the west that's the smartest thing to do.

(or not)

The sky was dark and I was sure that I was going to get absolutely nailed. I put my head down, got aero, and was determined to make it a good solid ride. If I'm going to get soaked and this is going to be nuts, then I'd better damn well make it count.

This week school started, which is busy and fun and emotionally draining and exciting and overwhelming and absolutely EXHAUSTING all at the same time. Our family went back to school this week.

And our family went back to chemo this week, too.

Another school year; another September battle. This time we know a bit more of what we're up against at least. And the will to fight never ceases to amaze me.

I rode into that storm and pushed hard on those pedals. I got out some much-needed aggression. Sometimes, even though it isn't ideal, you just have to put on the obnoxious fluorescent orange jersey, put your head down, and send yourself headfirst into a storm.

But you know the craziest thing?

The heavens never opened up. The farther I rode west, the brighter the sky got. And even now it gets me a bit choked up. I think it was someone trying to tell me something.

As bad as things may look, if you soldier on through, the sun just might come out.

And then, it's just another beautiful morning.

A New Season

Well, my triathlon season is at an end. Sad face. I had so much fun this summer even though I spent the first part of it nursing my hammy. I was very proud and happy to end on such good notes at Huntington and Lorain, and I look forward to next summer and making the local tri circuit rounds again!

I am SO EXCITED also about what is to come for Team Evotri. Partnering with Quintana Roo is already completely awesome. I can tell they are as excited about us joining the QR family as we are! I got my new CD0.1, and it is pretty amazing. I can't wait to take it out for some good fall rides, and winning my age group on it for my first race definitely made me a happy racer!

Someone else likes it, too.

My Bug is turning 4 in less than a month. It makes me really happy to see how much he values being active, and to think that Matt and I have helped to foster that in him makes us both really proud. He loves to do "exercises" and "stretches" and "ride bikes like Mommy." He also loves to watch me swim laps and thinks it's funny when I splash him on a flip turn. And he gets so excited to watch his daddy play soccer, too. (Daddy is one hell of an athlete, BTW. He just is so modest-slash-quiet that you never hear him talk about it!)

Fitting in my workouts gets tricky during the school year and usually involves me rising at some insane hour. I'm hoping to rope Ana into a run here and there before I head off to work, and definitely take the CD0.1 out on the weekends, too. And I'm definitely looking forward to mixing things up a bit here in the off-season. Maybe a 5K (I sure could use a new PR and am pretty confident I probably could do it), perhaps the Buckeye Trail Half Marathon in January (because running in 2 feet of snow = awesome), some work in the pool, and hopefully I'll even be able to fit in some group trainer rides once the weather turns nasty.

Dances With Dirt is coming up soon and let's just say my team has the BEST THEME EVER. Plus, it's a lot of my favorite running pals that I just don't get to see nearly enough. So I can't wait to head to Hell, Michigan, for some fun and crazy miles!

So the triathlons may be winding down, except for those in the warmer climes, but that doesn't mean you can't still have some fun! Sign up for something new. Dust off the speed in a shorter race--or hit a new distance in a longer one. Take your bike out for some fun rides with friends and enjoy the fall mornings (go ahead, buy yourself a sweet long-sleeved jersey or some arm warmers! You've earned it, I'm sure) Be active, and have fun.

The Hardest Thing I've Ever Done

The hardest thing I've ever attempted is being a working athlete mother. And I even have quite a bit of help, in the form of an amazing husband and family. But for some reason this past week seems to have been particularly tough. Tough physically, and especially emotionally.

Because, and I realize this is a good problem to have, there is simply too much for me to love and not enough hours in the day for me to fit it all in. I would never NOT want to work where I do. I would never NOT want to spend every waking second with Bug and Bean. And I can't even wrap my head around not working out at least 4 days a week.

So, by the wayside goes the unnecessary.

My beloved lengthy race reports, filled with pictures, for a start. Followed by all remnants of a clean and orderly house, dinner that involves more than a protein, a veggie, and brown rice, and afternoon workouts. I actually thought I could run after school today. Ha! Silly me. I know better. Even if I could somehow get that in (which it was literally impossible), all I ever want to do after school is spend time with Bug and Bean. And Bug's totally NOT down with the jogging stroller (yeah...he's been done with that for a while now).

Here it is, with random pictures and thoughts and I've got 15 minutes here so that's what you're gonna get:

Lorain Sprint Tri

I came, I did not have my heart in it, I tried to put my heart into it as much as I could, I still did pretty darn good.

Swim: Awful awful awful, but I didn't panic, which I take to be a result of me swimming in pretty rough conditions a few times this summer. So sucking is not good, but at least I didn't suck AND panic. Lots to work on here. I lost it in the swim on this race, and could have had a better finishing position with a better swim. Took a wrong turn in T1 to boot and had to turn back around. Awesome. Arg. 3/6 AG (<-----boo.)

Bike: Just didn't really have my head in the game here. Official results have me at 21.4 crazy miles per hour, which sounds awfully purty but is just not true. The course was a little short and I had 20.3 on my Joule, which is just about on par with what I did at Huntington. But only 160 watts?! Boo. I can do better. Held back a bit due to fears after a derailleur malfunction the night before, so kept it in pretty much the same gear the whole time. I should have trusted it a bit more, but wanted to have a good run so just kept on in the same gear. 1/6 AG

Run: Very proud of this. 25:05, which is an entire minute faster than Huntington. And I felt pretty awful! I could swear I was crawling. I need to take at least 90 more seconds off here. Work to be done, but definite progress! (1/6 AG)

All in all? Work to be done, but isn't there always and ain't that why I love this stuff? I muddled through after a challenging week and I didn't have my head in the game like I did at Huntington. So to finish where I did felt awesome.

5/52 overall females (a few seconds out of 4th--poop sandwich!)

1/6 Age Group (small field, but I finished just shy of 8 minutes ahead of 2nd, so pretty happy!)

Here are a few pics at least, courtesy of my awesome Mom:

And now I'm going to collapse. Goodnight!

Evotri and Quintana Roo!

Evotri Age Group Triathlon Team Partners with Quintana Roo

Chattanooga, Tenn. – August 17, 2011 – For the 2012 season, Quintana Roo is excited to partner with Team Evotri to provide each of the team members with the bike that Triathlete Magazine has called "the most innovative in the past decade from any brand," the CD0.1. The QR Shift Series is the only line of aerodynamic bikes designed specifically to minimize the substantial drag created by the drivetrain. QR's exclusive 18 millimeter offset downtube SHIFT Technology diverts concentrated airflow away from the drive side to produce a true, measureable bike-course advantage for every athlete at every level.

“We are very much looking forward to the partnership with Team EVOTRI for the upcoming season,” said Peter Hurley, QR CEO. “Having active social networking athletes on the CD0.1 for 2012 and beyond is an exciting direction Quintana Roo is heading.”

Team Evotri was conceived in 2007 based around the idea of finding out what happens when age group triathletes of all ability levels are provided with top coaching, technology and precision equipment. The team currently has eight members who share their journey via blogs, podcasts and social networking.

Evotri’s team model has been proven successful since 3 of the 8 age group athletes have qualified for the Ironman World Championships in Kona, Hawaii for the first time after joining the team. Other team members have also seen substantial improvements resulting from the team sponsorship package. The Evotri team also focuses on giving back to the triathlon community through organizing one of the fastest growing training camps for the Ironman distance. Held every summer, the Wisconsin Ironman Brick Adventure (WIBA) is a completely free weekend full of solid training, good sportsmanship and a wealth of knowledge.

Evotri Team Manager, Stu Joannes ("Simply Stu") states, "When I walked my rickety old bike into my first triathlon years ago, I remember seeing an incredible bike with a cool name - Quintana Roo. I told myself that one day I would ride one. Well, that day has finally come, and I couldn't be happier. The new CD0.1 is just an incredible ride that is packed with technology. I have come a long way since that first triathlon, and so has bike technology. My passion for the sport is only matched by the passion that Quintana Roo puts into bikes!"

Quintana Roo: http://www.quintanarootri.com/
Team Evotri: http://www.evotri.com/

Transitions, Part 2

"And when you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done." --Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go!

I started doing triathlons ten years ago almost to the day, with a good friend on a borrowed bike and following a computer-generated training plan. And I crossed that finish line, darn close to last. And loved every second of it.

And it made me want more.

And by more, I felt instinctively that this meant more MILES. Longer, longer, longer. Longer was better. Longer got all the glory. Longer got the NBC broadcast, right?

So that's what I did.

I set my sights on the long stuff in 2005. I completed my first half ironman the day before I signed up for my first Ironman. Because that's what you do. That's the natural progression of things, or at least that was how it seemed to me.

I kept up the long stuff and completed more half ironmans. Most were better; one was worse. All taught me a lot about what I am capable of and a fire that I have in here that hadn't been lit in a while.

I kept going long. And I did like it. But life started to change, yet my training did not. And for a while it was fun. It was exciting to me to prove to myself that I could still do the long stuff. I could still ride 3 to 4 hours, sneak it in during naptime, get up early and swim, and run on the treadmill while someone slept in the swing. For a while, that was exciting.

"You can get so confused that you'll start in to race down long-wiggled roads at a break-necking pace, and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space..."--Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go!

And then, after last summer, it wasn't fun. It became a chore. I dreaded the rides. I didn't feel like running. And swimming was something that I had a rough time fitting in because I knew it was 6am or nothing, and 6am is really tough when you have two children under 3 and one of them being just a few months old.

What motivated me, as the summer went on, was that I needed to make it worth it. Worth all the lost sleep, worth all the time on my bike when I could have been at home. That lit a fire in me, too, and I made it worth it to say the least. Shattering my PR by 16 minutes while still carrying around almost that many pounds is still something I'm extremely proud of. And it reminded me that 5:44 is still not my best. That there is something much faster than that in here, without a doubt.

But I was burned out.

I should have learned my lesson. I should have remembered all of this when I signed up for the marathon in May and set such a high goal. I did think about it when I got so sick last March, but the fire in there wouldn't let me quit. I had to at least try. And I still don't regret what I did.

But I realized more than ever after crossing the line in Cleveland that something had to change. I was trying to train and race the same way I did in 2005. And life in 2011 is completely different than it was in 2005.

I needed to adapt. To still feed that fire in me, but to adapt to the new reality of my wants and dreams. And my wants and dreams increasingly do not involve sitting on my bike for 3 or 4 hours. Because I've done that. I've done that, and I've done it well, and learned a lot and grown and succeeded.

I needed a change.

"It's okay to rest....but in the modern world, that's just not a popular idea. Outside of sport, in business, people boast about getting only two hours of sleep and still going into work. They're stressed, they're not sleeping, and they wonder why they feel like hell all the time. It's like the less you sleep, the more hardcore you are. Translate that to the triathlete world and it's 'Look at me, I ran twenty kilometers yesterday after riding for six hours.'"--Chris McCormack, I'm Here To Win

Instead of feeling pride after a ride or run, I felt almost inadequate. That no matter what I did, most of my training partners were doing double it. I couldn't keep up. And if I couldn't keep up with the volume, well, then, I must be worthless, right? I must not be cut out for this. Maybe I've outgrown triathlon.

"That's the monster that is human nature. We train to look good to other people, to look good to ourselves, to justify the cost of a coach, or as some sort of inoculation against the fear that we won't have what it takes on race day. But we rarely train for the only reason that matters: to be the best we can be in body and mind, and deliver our finest possible performance on race day, regardless of result."--Chris McCormack, I'm Here To Win

But this summer has shown me something. I have had so much fun.

SO much fun.

I can't remember having this much fun training or racing. It hasn't been a burden or a chore. It's been a release, an outlet, a social hour. It's pushed me beyond my comfort zone time and time again. It's left me crossing the finish line in a heap, ready to puke. It's made me ask, "Okay...is there another gear in here?" since the races are short enough that you have to--you have to push harder than is comfortable.

And I was totally comfortable with the attitude that I've held the past 6 seasons: that "I'm not very fast," that "I'm no good at sprints." I just thought if I wanted to succeed in triathlon, I needed to do what I was getting better at: 70.3s.

But I wasn't enjoying them. So maybe I'd do these shorter ones and even if I was horrible, it would fit into life better.

"One key to training this way is to attach no guilt to it. You have to let go of the numbers. Stop counting how many miles you did at the end of the week! You have to train yourself to be confident that you are doing enough and stop overtraining as a security blanket."--Chris McCormack, I'm Here to Win

The funny thing? I'm actually not horrible. Three races can't be a fluke. Yesterday I won my age group and finished 5th overall, once again shocking the hell out of myself. Even in a large and talented field at Lifetime, where I felt pretty rotten and like I wasn't ready and had a pretty horrible run, I still finished near the top third.

And I feel like yesterday has really forced me to turn a corner here and transition into something different. I want to keep this fun going. I love the fire in me when I'm chasing someone down. I love the feeling when I'm red-lining. It's something new and exciting, and it may not be as glamourous as Ironman, but it sure is a lot more fun for me right now.

Next season will be more of this. It will start with a super fast half marathon in May. And then it will be as many sprints and Olympics as I can pack into a summer, depending upon what works for my family. Because nothing beats racing close to home with my kids at the finish line. Nothing. Instead of spending hours on my bike every weekend, I'm going to spend a few hours racing like I stole something. I'm going to hit the track hard. I'm going to hit the pool hard. I'm going to continue to get stronger as a cyclist and mix up longer stuff with intervals. I'm going to continue to lift and get stronger.

I'm transitioning. And I'm ready.

Transitions

I don't do so well with transitions.

I'm like my soon-to-be-four year old Bug, who NEVER wants to go somewhere (bath, library, park, fill in the blank) and then when he gets there it's the BEST!THING!EVER! and does not want to leave.

Let me be straight: I love my job. But I hate the transition from full-time SAHM for 10 weeks to full time working mommy. I usually get a healthy dose of guilt with a side order of not sleeping well for about 2 weeks or so. The two weeks that happen to usually be the craziest of the school year (tied with the last week of school).

So I was really trying to stay positive. I felt guilty for doing a race this weekend the day before I head back, though. Especially with such a late start time: I don't even start until 8:20 or so. And the course is slightly longer (you know, one of those local deals, not a USAT course) so I'm looking at being done after 11, not home until at least noon, etc etc etc. Guilt. GUILTY.

I was thinking about downgrading to the sprint just for the sake of time. Still fun but done much earlier since their waves go off earlier anyways. But then I felt like a slacker.

And then I felt like punching myself. Who does 3 triathlons in 6 weeks with two children under 4 and is SLACKING? Seriously.

Sometimes I let myself get a little warped since I train with people who have much higher volume and go much longer than I do. I knew this summer would be like this, and that's why I adjusted my schedule accordingly. So why am I feeling bad about that? Have I become so warped that I really don't think a sprint "counts" anymore?

Because if I'm becoming one of those people, I need someone to throw a pie in my face or something. Maybe smack me. Because that attitude is annoying. And just plain wrong.

Lately, I've been lucky to be able to even get out at all, and it's been so great, even if it is alone sometimes. I will miss my early morning sunrise swim and runs with friends, since those are gone until next year. I will have to be done by 6:30am from here on out during the week, and I've come to accept that I need one day of rest on the weekend for nothing but family things: zoo, library, snow fun, etc. So it's about to get pretty isolated up in hrrr, because I don't think I can convince my SAHM friends to meet me as early as I need to.

Because their job is seriously tiring, yo. I have huge respect for them. I'm tired after work, too, but it's a different kind of tired.

And then yesterday we got some news that is a game-changer. It's a game-changer for the next few months, and quite stressful to say the least. I was already up at 4am consumed with it. And it made me want to do the sprint for sure.

But then now I'm thinking maybe to continue with the slightly-longer-than-an-olympic Olympic. Because it's my last tri for months. Because I (somewhat) trained for it all summer. Because yeah, I can't do the mileage and hours most of my friends can do right now, but I still love this stuff anyway.

So I'm going to think about it. I'm going to do the race either way, and I think it might be a game time decision.

For now, I need to transition myself to hit this major pile of schoolwork.

My Open Water Fishies

Well, my bike is still...in limbo, so to speak, so I've been swimming, running, and hanging at the beach lots this week. And these kids LOVE the beach. And I love that they get to grow up enjoying living down the street from this like I did.

And this girl comes from a long line of talkers...can you tell?

Anxiously awaiting some big news that I can't wait to share! Happy training and racing this weekend!

Goodbye to a friend

Ahhhh. I just had a bittersweet parting with my Specialized frame. Bittersweet, because I get very very attached to things. Like, take for instance, my piece of junk '99 Chevy Cavalier base model car. I sold it to a nice kid, and then teared up when it drove away.

I just think about all the places it took me, that's all--DON'T YOU JUDGE ME (SNIFF SNIFF).

So I had one more awesome ride on it this weekend--took it for a spin with my former college roommate turned tri sensation (which I take full credit for, thank you very much) DaisyDuc. Hammered out a nice 2 hour ride on it for my last brick and today, I said goodbye. I am passing it on to my good friend Laura, so I will still have visitation rights.

But I am very excited for what's to come. Oh, yes. VERY excited.

And I should have some news and pictures hopefully by the end of the week!

Last week was a solid week of training despite craziness at home. I should seriously do a post or two about how insane in the membrane this summer has been. Between our addition, chasing after my Bug and Bean, and working on creating content and presenting it for ClevelandHistorical (which I am super proud of and very excited to be a part of), Matt and I haven't really had any down time. And this is exactly why I knew I wouldn't be able to put in the miles for a 70.3--that and my rotten right hamstring issues.

Which, by the way, (knock on wood) are NO MORE! Apparently the cure WAS more running! Who knew?

Anyway, I am still having fun swimbikerunning albeit at shorter distances. This summer I've been reminded how much I just love this sport for what it is and what it does for me. If I need it to be long, it can. If life is crazy and I don't even have time to do laundry or grocery shopping, it's still there for me in a different way.

But I am very very very excited for the direction my team is heading, both with our sponsors AND our team event next year.

And I know next year, if all goes well, I will be able to get back into the long stuff and do Rev3 Cedar Point again. I had such a great experience there and am looking forward to seeing what I can do when I'm not a few months postpartum and a few pounds up. And of course, to have the family at the finish line with me.

For this season, I have one more Olympic distance on the 21st--another great, local race--and then Dances With Dirt with four of the coolest people I know in late-September. It feels weird to NOT be gearing up for the 70.3 right now, but I know this was the right decision.

And it has me chomping at the bit for all the exciting stuff to come next season.

Goody Goody Gumdrops

I got a VERY EXCITING PACKAGE in the mail just now....ACK!

Very exciting news for Team Evotri coming soon! More pics to follow!

And then the HEAVENS OPENED UP

I haven't had a ride like this in a while!

So I am visiting a few buddies tomorrow and had to get my long ride in. No big whoop, since Matt wasn't building today (that's a whole 'nuther post about what we've been up to this summer) so I could hit the road by 6:30am or so and then even get in a 15 minute runoff. I'd be home while the kids were still watching Jake and the Neverland Pirates in PJs.

I worked out the deets with Ana last night and then passed out by 10.

Got up this morning and Ana had not one, but TWO sick kiddies, so she had to bail. Bummer all around. Two hours solo is aiiight and all, but I'd rather have a buddy.

Set out by about 6:40 or so and went down the block to head west on Lake Road. But, um, that sky looked pretty dark.

Hmmmm.

I didn't check the radar.

My neighbor Mike was taking his garbage out, so I yelled to him, "Hey! It's Sara! (because he looked really confused as who this crazy biker was) Have you seen the radar?"

He replied that he hadn't, but we both agreed it looked a bit ominous.

"Oh well," I yelled to him, "It's just water, right?"

And I took off.

(famous last words)

I made it out to Sheffield slowly forcing my way through a nasty headwind and got hit with the first round. It was raining pretty hard, but just for about 3 minutes. No big deal, I thought! I've totally got this! That was it?

Ha. Noooooooo. That was NOT IT.

Turned around in Lorain and texted Ana that I was gonna get slammed with a storm but it was too late now! Took off back and then it got CRAZY.

Like, could barely see in front of me crazy.

I kept thinking that it reminded me of some insane rides I had training for Ironman. I mean, when you're spending 6 hours or so on your bike EVERY Saturday, stuff like this is bound to happen. And I am of the school of thought that it's better to keep on training in it because you never know what race day might bring.

But then the lightening started. Uh oh.

I finally capitulated and pulled off at a rinky dink beer and wine shop that had an awning. Tried to text Ana and Matt but it was the lovely half a mile or so dead zone where my cell doesn't work. Arg. Wrang out my gloves and tried to get the fog off my glasses while I weighed my options.

I was about 6 miles from home. Just long enough that it would be a royal pain to bail and take poor Matt longer to get the kids in the car than it would be to just keep going.

So I HTFU and kept on going as soon as it cleared a bit and the lightening stopped.

Finally made it to my street and then figured, what the hey, might as well make it the full 2 hours. I was already covered in mud and nastiness. So I kept on going into Rocky River a bit and then eventually made my way back home. It was a little slower than usual, but I still got in over 36 miles which, all things considered, wasn't too shabby.

The rain stopped when I got home--of course!--so I threw on my shoes and did a quick runoff. Shocked the heck out of myself by averaging 7:45 for the 15 minutes that I ran. Where was THAT last week?!

And then, I was done.

And tired of being soaked.

So what did I do next?

Showered and--wait for it--took the kids to a splash park. And got wet again! If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, I guess.

All in all, a fun ride that was a total flashback to my Iron-Summer five years ago. Gotta love it.

Race Report: Huntington Sprint Triathlon, 2011

As I explained in my previous post...I was very excited for this race.

It's a mile from my house. How cool is that? So I still didn't sleep well the night before (standard), but at least it was easy to get to! Plus, a lot of my local tri buddies were going to be there, and that rocks.

I felt like I needed to redeem myself a bit from Lifetime--I know that I did the best I could there, but I felt like it just wasn't good enough. I could do more. But I never know what sprints can bring. I sort of have one speed, and it's 70.3. I can dial that speed in, no problem. But a sprint? It should hurt. You should be gasping for air at the end. And that's not a race pace I'm really used to.

So I decided it was time to dial it up a notch.

I wanted this to hurt.

Despite crazy nasty storms, the lake was NOT choppy! I was pretty stoked about that. It was pretty warm and I wanted to go hard, but not totally blow it. I definitely felt like I needed to push it, though, especially after my pretty rotten swim at Lifetime. So push I did. I found a few legs, drafted for a bit, passed, and went comfortably hard. I knew I could have gone a little harder, but I didn't feel like I dogged it like I did at Lifetime. I was happy with my effort.

Swim Time 9:57

Place 6/19 AG

Got out and ran the almost 1/4 mile up to transition--sheesh! Tried to stay calm and collected and remember that I was about to embark on what's become my best leg. My buddy Ken was there and told me there were some girls to catch. I had a rough time getting my right leg clipped in but then I was off.

One of my former students and I leaving T1! She was doing her very first tri and finished 2nd in her age group--yay, Megan!

OFF OFF OFF.

Long story short--I killed it. I felt FABULOUS on this ride and my watts were high but I felt good. I picked people off left and right and got especially excited when I saw a leg that had a "U" on it, as that was my age group. I passed 4 or 5 girls with U's, and didn't see any U's pass me, so I was excited. I knew I was near the front of the age group and felt awesome.

And then I took a wrong turn.

About 1/2 mile from transition. SO STUPID. I even knew it was wrong. I knew we were supposed to go straight, but the police officer was waving right. Turns out, he was waving the cars and not us, but I saw a fast chick turn and stupidly I followed like a lemming. She really let the police officer have it and yelled, "I was winning this!" at him, but I silently turned and chalked it up to not trusting my gut and knowing the course better. I knew better than making that mistake and turning, and was mad at myself for doing it.

I probably lost 30-45 seconds.

But I hoped that I had built up a big enough cushion to still hang onto an age group place. I was not sure what this run would bring as my hamstring has been much better, but I haven't really tried to go that hard on it. I put on my brand new birthday racing flats, Saucony Mirages, that are obnoxious blue, grabbed my visor, and took off hoping for the best.

I was kind of being the Chris Leito of the average-Jane 30-34 females in NEO. I took his strategy of hammer the hell out of the bike and pray you can hold on. I felt a bit like a hunted/wounded animal, but I tried to just focus on the run ahead.

Bike: 36:19

1/19 AG

20.2 mph

I felt SOOOO slow. The first mile, I expected U's to pass me left and right. I certainly must have been running 10 minute miles.

Except I wasn't.

My pre-race dream goal was to hold 8s, and it appeared that I was doing relatively close to that. I don't know because my little Nike kid's watch doesn't take lap splits, but I did time my 2nd mile and it was just under 8. Could this be true? One of the volunteers told me at about 2.5 miles that I was "the fourth female, and you can catch those other ones if you hurry." I knew that wasn't true because of the wave starts--I knew for SURE there were some SMOKIN' fast 40+ masters females behind me that were actually "ahead" time-wise. But if there were only 4 ahead of me, and I knew two of them I knew for sure were masters, then that meant maybe one more that was possibly in my age group.

Or not.

Or it was me, in first place.

I knew then, with about .6 miles to go, that this was going to be my race to lose. And I sure as hell was NOT about to lose it then. There would be NO U's passing me, and if one did, and this turned into a Raelert-Macca thing, then I WOULD BE MACCA.

(*of course, both Raelert and Macca could beat me while running backwards wearing stilettos blindfolded, but you get the point, right?)

This was a huge mental victory for me, because usually at this point in a race, I am talking to myself and saying things like, "Hey, 3rd place is pretty good" or "well, I had a great bike today," but there was NONE OF THAT in this race. I knew coming off the bike that I was probably in first, and I made up my mind throughout most of the run that it was going to stay like that. End of story.

I knew those girls behind me might be fabulous runners, and I was hoping for maybe a 25 minute 5K at best, and can I really win this thing with a 25+ minute 5K?

The answer today was YES.

I dashed up the hill, kicked it into high gear just in case, and finished in 1:16.47, just 10 seconds ahead of the 2nd place girl in my age group.

Thanks to my awesome friend, Anne, for taking these pics for me!

She almost got me, but I was NOT going to have that today. No way. I finished the way I wanted to--gasping, almost puking, and smiling.

Run 26:05

Pace 8:25/mile

5/19 AG

Met my two kiddies and Matt afterwards and got to hug them lots and lots.

1/19: 30-34 Females

9/115: Overall Females

72/292: Total Finishers

And THAT is how I rang in my next decade of triathlons.

10 Years

Right about now is the 10th anniversary of my first triathlon.

So that's kind of what makes tomorrow so cool.

At 24, I had just moved back up to the NEO. I had decided that law school would not be for me, and that despite the beatings that teaching tends to give you (especially as a young female teacher in a high school setting), I was in it for the long haul.

A nice little Saturday at 24 included happy hour, lots of pizza, dollar drafts, and staying out with my friends having a wild rumpus until approximately 2:00am, chasing the evening with bagel bites.

(Needless to say, I had some junk in my trunk.)

That summer, my girl TriShannon and I decided we were going to make some changes. She was going to leave a job that was secure but not fulfilling, and I was going to do a few daring things myself. We both signed up for our first sprint triathlon and trained diligently on a plan we found on Beginnertriathlete.com. And by diligently, I mean we rode mountain bikes. And sometimes had DQ Blizzards after our "grueling" 15-20 mile rides.

What became a lofty goal quickly changed into a lifestyle. We finished the race that day, despite the rain. Despite running into a buoy with my head and almost losing my goggles. Despite the doubts and fears.

I felt like I could do anything after that.

So I did.

Two weeks later, I took what I now refer to as The Most Important Road Trip of My Life--something I had been meaning to do for years. I finally let go. I signed up for Weight Watchers, cleaned up my act, and lost 35 pounds. And 6 weeks after my first triathlon I got up the courage to tell Matt how I really felt.

(Okay, so that one did require a little liquid courage. But the end justified the means, people)

Then came a marathon. And Pedal to the Point. And my wedding. And then all doubt was shot since I knew the answer to, "Can I do an Ironman?" after I did those things. I had the base, I had the desire, and I had the support, which is all you really need. So then came my Wisconsin Year.

A few more blinks later came my little Bug, and finally my little Bean. And here we all are, 10 years later, I-don't-know-how-many-races-later, and still a few DQ Blizzards later.

So tomorrow's race will most likely be in a choppy lake, as we've had some big time storms roll through. It will be hot, it will be humid. If I do it well, it will be a suffer fest where I end gasping for air and doubled-over, since that's the best way to do a sprint, right? I never do these sprints, so this should be interesting. But for me, I'm thinking it will be more like a celebration of the past 10 years and what that simple little local triathlon race did for me.

It brought me courage. Friendship. Health. The ability to really, finally, believe in myself.

And I kind of wish I could go back 10 summers and see that 24 year old girl and tell her, yes, you can do this. You can do everything you want to do. Sometimes it will be hard and you'll fall flat on your face and have a choppy lake and humidity that will suck and headwinds both ways. But that life you always wanted to have? The happiness, the health, the two children? It's even better than you can imagine.

And it's just down that road. So put your goggles on and rack that borrowed bike.

It's time to go.

Ramping up!

Okay, no time for rest, it's RACE SEASON, BABY!

And, in the ultimate weirdness of the universe, my leg feels SO MUCH BETTER now. What? Seriously? Because if all I needed to do was RUN MORE...dude, I would have done that a long time ago. It's still a bit tight so I'm stretching and foam rolling like an insane person, but I feel like it's finally going in the right direction instead of getting worse. Maybe I can still have some fun on the run in these last few tris!

Monday I spun easy on the trainer, Tuesday I did a swim, short run to test out my new racing flats (SO cool--happy birthday to me! Thanks, Little Brother M and Mom and Dad!), and then lifted because after seeing my race pics I felt like Flabby McFlabberston. What is the deal with race pictures? Do they put a "fugly" lens on just for me or is that universal? The bike pics are fine--I have no problem with those, and in fact some are quite badass. But the swim and run? WOW. I am not sure it's possible to take a more hilariously un-flattering picture if you tried. Of course, I'm working on trying to post a few here so bear with me. You have to see these. The run ones are exquisite.

Yesterday I ran easy with Ana and it felt pretty good. The quads are still a little tired from the race, but I was just happy to not feel as tight or as much pain. Score!

Today, I decided to forego the pool (much to Ana and Laura's dismay--they are not into the open-water thing) and head to meet a few people at an open water swim. Let me just say that sometimes I forget how freaking awesome where I live is. Yeah, the winters are a bit on the snowy side and stuff, but I live about two blocks away from here:

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah. I love it. Except, wait...do you see those waves there?

Yeah, the ones crashing into the wall in that second shot? Um, those suckers were 4-6 feet.

We all gulped a bit and said, "Here goes!" And, hey! I finally got to have that swim at Steelhead that was cancelled! Because these conditions were probably the same if not a bit worse. But you know what? I had a BLAST.

There's just something about swimming in open water, especially when there's a sunrise like that. Need to sight? Just look at downtown and see Terminal Tower. Or use the sun as your guide. Yeah, my time was crap and I got thrown all over the place and my buddy Ken ran into what we think was a log the size of a telephone pole since it was so freaking wavy. Yeah, I got a whitecap to the face that did have me shaken a bit. No WAY would I ever have allowed Ana to have this as her first Open Water Swim--she'd be drifting to Canada probably by now since the waves made it virtually impossible to swim. But the four of us felt like rockstars when we were done. Because if you can swim a mile in that like we did, then you can handle ANYTHING on race day.

And that is exactly why it's so important to get in.

Money in the bank mentally for my next two swims. I'm determined to have a better showing in the next few races in the water. Looking forward to a solid weekend of training and getting ready to race the Huntington Sprint on the 24th. A sprint?! How do you race those things again? I have one speed--70.3. I'm going to have to find another gear here and quickly!

Summer is pretty much awesome. And that is all.