it's finally may

(with apologies to e.e. cummings)

it's may and things are changing
it's may and it smells like it and today it rained and then was sunny
andeverythingwaspuddlewonderful

today i felt strong and like something new
and everytime i took a breath i felt the air in my lungs
and it smelled like flowers and grass
and the sun peeked out
and the shadow girl was back again

in may everything finally blooms
after a long, gray winter
and i passed lots of tulips as i ran
which is good because they are my favorite
and in may you remember that winter is long
and gray
but not eternal
and no matter how cold
and no matter how long
the red and orange and
even
the
white
tulips
open up

in may when you run and you smell this and see this
and remember where you were four mays ago
you remember you stood at the start line of something scary

you stood at the start line of your first marathon

and you were very afraid

and you had some extra baggage (both in body and mind)

and your course took you through the city
and the town you live in
and the town you taught in
and the town you grew up in
and the man who would become your husband was there
and your family and friends were there
and they watched you

become
something
new

and now it's may again
and in three short weeks
you realize you'll be at that same start line
but this time you'll be leading
and people will be
following you
because you will be pacing it
you will say
follow me
and you will help people reach their goal

and you'll smell the grass
and you'll feel the excitement
and you'll be overcome with the sense of change that has happened in four short years

that is still happening

that is four short months away

and sometimes things will be gray and cold
(not outside but inside)

but you know that in the end

no matter how
insurmountable
it
seems

you will open up

and the colors will return

and the shadow girl will meet her match