storm watch

We had our first great storm tonight.

Not rain, but a STORM.

I love storms.

I love watching the underside of the leaves start to show as the wind picks up. I love seeing the gray clouds come in over the lake. I like how everything is first quiet and calm before the wind starts. I can't wait to sit in front of my big window with a candle lit, hoping the storm has lightening and listening to the rain on my roof.

I don't know why I've been drawn to storms my whole life, but for some reason, I have. I used to want to be a storm chaser...you know, like one of those people in that cheesy movie "Twister" who ran after tornadoes. Severe thunderstorm warnings fascinate me. I love to see where the storm is headed...how we try to predict things about them but they never truly know where it will go. There is that element of surprise to it. A little bit of danger. It's more powerful than us, and for some reason, I enjoy the feeling of respect I have for a good storm.

I don't know if it's because I'm a Cancer or what, but I am just drawn to water--even in the midst of a thunderstorm. It calms me down. I feel like I can really breathe when water surrounds me.

The more powerful, the better.

One of my earliest memories was when I was a little kid--maybe 4 or 5?--at the Y that I swim in now, ironically. They had this pole that went all the way to the bottom of the deep end. They put it in there and had us walk our little hands down to the bottom so we wouldn't be afraid.

I was never, ever afraid of the deep end. I don't know why. I can't explain it. Water just felt like home.

I remember standing at the edge, watching little kids nervously shimmy-ing down to the bottom. Some looked really scared.

I couldn't wait for my turn.

I went to the bottom and held on.

I stayed there. All I heard was the eerie quiet of water as I held my breath.

I stayed there so long they had to pull the pole out of the water with little me on the end because they thought something was wrong.

So, I've always enjoyed storms. I look forward to them and in my mind I am still chasing them a bit--respecting the fact that nature is much more powerful than you or I or Triple Doppler Three Radar. The fact that it's unpredictable. It's a little bit dangerous. And it's fascinating.

And I guess when I really thought about it tonight as the thunder clapped and I sat by my window, I realized that even though I'm 28 years old, I still have quite a bit in common with little me.

I'm still sort of chasing a storm.