Thursday, January 18, 2007
Mission: To exit during the long break between midterm exams/lunch and hit the snazzy new Y to do a swim.
No one suspects a thing. Flying Pig bag is all packed up. Zoot suit is ready to go.
Enter 29 civilians to take a 143 question test.
Play role of "teacher." Code name: Mrs. Z. (Other Aliases: ZimDogg, ZuhzuhzuhZEEEEUNIT.) Answer questions. Read the riot act about cell phones and iPods. Pass out scantrons. Watch for wandering eyes. Demand nothing but a number 2 pencil.
Collect tests. Eye clock. You will have a short amount of time for said mission. Must complete 2500 yards or it's not worth getting in the pool.
Testing period ends. Two subjects approach you. Keep your cool. They are what the District calls "freshman." These types of subjects usually ask questions incessantly. They are overly excited to actually go out to lunch, since they never get to do this.
"Mrs. Z, we're going to Herb's Place for lunch! Where are you going?"
"I'm....going to swim. And then a sandwich."
NONONONONO you have BLOWN YOUR COVER! Exit strategy commence!
"I mean I'm going to swim. Really. And then come back here and eat my sandwich."
*freshman look at each other quizzically*
"You're going to SWIM?"
Quick! ABORT CONVERSATION!
*one subject says to the other:*
"Dude, I don't think she ever stops."
Quickly grab Pig bag, while laughing at subject comment. Lock all items secure. Drive to prearranged location. Quick change back into TriSaraTops.
Execute 2500 yards. 500 warm up, 10 X 50 drills, 5X200 NS, 3X100 hard, 200 CD.
Examine clock. Just in time.
Quick change: grey pants, purple sweater, makeup. Back to "Mrs. Z." Report back to 221 for duty. Appear as if nothing happened.
"Hey, Mrs. Z...can I have some extra review?"
Outstanding. They bought it.